Miavel

It seemed the potential ‘no king’ sanctuary was now gone. Right out the window. Never to be seen from again. I wasn’t going to back down on my words, though. Holding my head higher, I looked him right in the eyes, determined to feel and seem calm.

Even if this was a terrible idea.

“I… Yes. You have my permission.”

It was at the moment I finished my words that I noticed it. Just the slightest change in his expression. The tiniest twitch at the corner of his mouth as if he was holding back from smiling. The way his eyes seemed to be more rounded all of a sudden, softening.

He started to reach a hand up to my face and I couldn’t help my own reaction. From years of being around my family, years of dealing with fast hands and flying objects…

I flinched. It was barely anything. I hadn’t even moved a half inch, but just as I noticed the changes in his face, he noticed me.

His expression hardened again, and I felt the loss of it pang in my chest.

“Your eyes…” he whispered, “are just like the irises.”

Irises.

My gaze drew off to the side, to the very flowers he was speaking of. Was it his favorite flower? Maybe he likes the color of them?

But why would he compare my eyes to them?

In just a split second, the most horrifying thought crossed my mind. My eyes widened as I had forgotten where I was and who I was with.

He’s not going to steal my eyeballs, right?

I stared at the irises, willing my thought to be wrong. My focus was so intense that I didn’t notice him lean closer until I heard him chuckle lightly.

“Since you are my legal wife, consider your eyeballs spared.” He leaned back just enough to catch my gaze. “I don’t steal eyeballs, Miavel.” And then he took a step back with a tiny amused smile on his face. “Until you figure out what you were going to say last night, I’ll be waiting.”

I stared at the spot he had been in for several minutes.

The eyeball comment.

I said my thoughts out loud, didn’t I? How much exactly did I say aloud? Why was he laughing at it?

Why was it a great sound to hear?

He… he said my name. He said Miavel.

Why did I like it when he said my name?

Was… was he making a joke? To me?

Had I made him smile... just that little bit?

And did he know what I was going to ask him last night? Did Rogers tell him?

He’ll be waiting.

For me.

Waiting for me.

As if he was still there, my mouth was opening and closing all on its own, but nothing was coming out.

I stood there for so long, stunned, that it took Lilia and Rogers appearing in front of me to break out of it. But some part of my mind was still there, seeing that small smile on his face, hearing that light chuckle, seeing the change in his eyes when I gave him permission.

Talyn Thera.

I’d been referring to him, in my mind and out loud, as His Majesty, the King, or as my husband, but he had a name.

Talyn Raima Thera.

“Talyn.”

Somehow, saying his name suddenly didn’t feel so strange. The eyes were supposedly the windows to the soul. Maybe seeing his eyes change, become soft and gentle, made all the difference.

Maybe I unexpectedly caught a glimpse of his soul, a glimpse of something nobody else got to see.

In my mind, I recalled the most memorable moments I’d had with him so far. One was of the encounter with the door. The moment that had just happened now popped right back up. The walk and conversation we had going down the corridors to the audience room. Most of the rest were of him seemingly threatening me.

Well, they’d felt like threats at the time, but as I went over his words in my mind, I realized how many gaps I’d filled in, making those words seem worse.

When I’d asked him if I was already in danger, I recalled the look in his eyes, how sure he’d been in his response, how he’d quickly uttered those words.

“No. I’ve made sure of that.”

He was being gentle to me. He was letting me have my own room, telling me it was alright to spend money. He was letting me do the duties of a real queen. He’d personally handed me, figuratively, a room he’d constructed with care, just because I liked it.

Was he putting up a front in order to protect me?

I nearly laughed at my own thoughts. I was probably just being ridiculous and overthinking it all.

Though, I supposed, he didn’t really seem like a monster, not like what everyone claimed he was. Maybe on the battlefield he was different, but here, somehow, I felt as though I could trust him.

If I didn’t trust him, who could I trust?

When it came time to turn in for the night, the day having been quite successful despite the constant distraction of Talyn Thera in my head. His eyes, his voice, his, well, his body too. All of it kept appearing randomly within my mind.

After Lilia left for the night, I worked up the courage to knock on the door again. I held my breath, waiting.

A click, and he was there. This time, at least, he hadn’t just gotten done bathing. This time, he was still fully dressed.

“Have you figured out what to say?” he asked, adding the most adorable tilt of his head with his words.

Adorable?

I nearly lost track of what I had been about to say. Closing my mouth for a moment, I found the words back.

“Yes.”

“Go ahead.”

“I’d like to go on an outing.”

He was silent for a moment. “An outing? As in?”

I took a deep breath before reaching to grab the documents for Lord Malin’s Dukedom application. I’d marked the lines that had problems. Essentially, most of it had marks. I held it out to him quietly for a moment. Only when he grabbed the file did I explain.

“There are some potentially major discrepancies in his ledger. I’d like to see the state of his land and people myself to confirm if these mistakes were just that, mistakes.”

“And if they aren’t?”

“I’d like to see and speak with his people.” I bowed my head. “I cannot make a decision on who to recommend for Dukedom while this remains unseen with my own eyes. I’d like to go there in the next week.”

I heard him flip through the pages for a while.

“Lift your head.”

When I did, he nodded to me.

“I’ll approve of it. Let me know the day you choose.” His head, which moved ever so slightly at the end of his sentence, clued me in.

“However?”

He couldn’t hide his quick smile fast enough. Somehow, I felt lucky for seeing it in time, for catching on to what he was going to say next. A kind of bubbly giddy feeling rose in my chest.

“However, you should go discreetly. No announcing arrivals and departures. Don’t be noticed.” He handed the papers back to me. “You’ll need to take a few guards with you.”

I nodded.

“Thank you, Your Majesty.”

It was when the door was quite nearly closed that I heard it. The words were so strange, though, that I wasn’t sure I’d heard him right.

“You can just call me Talyn…”

Click.

I stared at the door.

What?

What did he just say?

Call him… Talyn?

He wants me to call him Talyn?

Talyn

I leaned my back against the wall.

Did I just – did I really say that? Did she hear it?

I refrained from making any noise as I made my way to the bed. Sitting down, I stared at the door that connected our rooms, one that I had sworn to myself that I wouldn’t open unless it was necessary.

Lately, it was as if I couldn’t keep a handle on myself. Seeing her holding a child during our audiences, and feeling that desperate and sudden longing for a family with her. I couldn’t help but watch her leave the room that day, even though I knew others were present. I went to see the blooming irises, as per my normal, despite knowing she regularly went to that room, and then just gave the whole room to her. I knew, deep down, if she got too close to me, or if I got too close to her, then the amount of danger she’d be in would be exponentially greater. I’d grown used to it, grown accustomed to assassins and rumors.

Miavel wasn’t me.

She’d get hurt and claim she was fine.

She’d claim things were her duty, even if it meant sacrificing a bit of herself.

I closed my eyes and fell back onto the bed, weary.

How could I ask such a thing? For her to call me by name. That was the same as getting close to me.

And I knew that when those words came out.

But I couldn’t help it.

Miavel…

What I wanted and what I could have were different things.

It didn’t matter if I wanted to tell her, to let her know the real reason I gifted her the whole of the Emerald Room.

She couldn’t know, in fact, nobody knew. All they knew was that it was on a whim, a hunting trip turned into a room full of plants.

She couldn’t know that the reason I had those flowers planted, the reason I visited those deep blue irises every single time they bloomed, was all her to begin with.

Those irises were the closest color to her eyes, and whenever I came close to forgetting the color within my memory, the flowers bloomed again to remind me.

I stared up at the ceiling of my room.

If I could protect you easily by keeping you close, then I would, Miavel.

I would.

The only reason I’m still here is because of you.