*BONUS CHAPTER
Rewarded as an exclusive release on Tapas for 10k Ink donated during the Inktober event November 2019. This bonus chapter is not intended to be part of the main story!

The flames danced with grace in the fireplace. It was so cold outside that Eyre pulled the thick blanket up under her chin. She looked out the window and saw how the snow had covered everything and how the frost was biting so hard that it formed ice crystals on the glass.

She was able to remain warm with a pair of knitted socks and a large sweater. There were plenty of winter clothes hidden in the old wooden chest in her parent’s bedroom, but it was not the only thing that her mother left behind. In the same chest, she had discovered her mother’s old journal that held onto memories from when she was still a child. However, she did not know why Kai would hide such precious memories from her.

She stroked the front cover with a gentle hand and felt a sharp pain in her chest at the thought of her mother. Kai had left her oblivious to her childhood life up until a month ago. A bitter aftertaste still lingered in her mouth when she thought back on the day he confessed.

She put the journal back on the coffee table next to her. In truth, she could only smile knowing that he had been part of her life from the beginning. No one could ever take his place or even compare. Kai was the reason she wanted a long life.

The back door went up with force and Kai stomped in with dry wood for the fire. He kicked the door shut, waltzed over to the fireplace, and dropped off the dry wood in a basket. He wiped off the damp temples with the back of his hand and then turned towards Eyre with no hesitation. In a matter of seconds, he knelt and scooped his arms under the blanket just so he could hug her legs.

Eyre jumped in surprise when a sudden chill hit the back of her knees.

“Oh my lord that’s cold!” she exclaimed.

Kai looked up at her with a bold smirk that made her heart skip a beat. The heat rushed to her cheeks and forced her to avoid his gaze out of embarrassment.

“Why do you have to keep using me as your heat source?” she asked.

Kai smirked with a soft sigh before he pulled her down from the chair and onto his lap.

“The fire won’t warm me the same way you do,” he said with a straight face.

Pinned between the armchair and him, Eyre remained speechless. His choice of words made her cover his mouth with her hand out of pure instinct. He looked her in the eye for a while, admiring her spirit and energy despite what she had gone through. He then closed his eyes and pressed his lips against the palm of her hand.

His soft and gentle touch sent shivers down her spine and her cheeks blushed in an instant. It was nothing new, but it always surprised her. She moved her hand from his mouth and let it rest against his cheek. Her thumb moved in light strokes while her heart jumped for joy.

Kai looked up and found himself lost in her eyes.

"I want-" he hesitated.

Eyre blinked and tilted her head in confusion. He swallowed and felt his body tense up.

"I want you to be happy," he said while trying to suppress an overwhelming desire to embrace her.

Though to his surprise, Eyre leaned in and hugged him.

A warm smile surfaced on her lips.

"As long as you are here, I'll be happy every day," she whispered.

With a clenched jaw and squinted eyes, his heart soared in bliss and he felt his way along the curves over her back as he pulled her in close. Eyre pulled him in even further with a deep breath. It was the way she reacted to his touch that fueled his desire even further. He leaned in, nuzzled her neck, and did not realize that he lost himself in her scent and that the addiction drove him into a corner. It was dangerous for him to be this close to her, but there was nothing that could prevent his burning desire from escalating.

Love held no significance to Kai. It was all but a notion created by humans. The thing he believed in was the will and desire to protect. Although he found himself bound to Eyre in ways he never could have imagined. People would say that he had fallen in love, but he did not understand such human emotion.

He pulled her down on the longhaired rug in front of the fireplace and kept her pinned under him. Shocked by the drastic change in their position Eyre placed her hands on his chest to support him. Her heart fluttered with excitement, but her sense of reason knew that something was off.

"Kai," she panted and tried to get his attention.

However, he took her words the wrong way and let his hand trail along her body. With a solid grip on her thigh, he managed to position himself between her legs.

Eyre blushed out of embarrassment although fully dressed.

"Kai, please…!" she begged and ended up pinching both of his cheeks with force to get his attention.

His face was on fire when he pulled back and their eyes met. He sighed in defeat and got up on his knees.

Eyre shielded her face with her hands in shame.

“I'm sorry,” she said while her heart fluttered with a lingering hunger.

Kai did his best to stay calm and collected, but when she tried to hide away he reached out for her shoulders and pulled her in until she sat up straight,

"Don't fall for it," he warned.

She froze on the spot aware of what he meant, but she pretended not to know and would never admit it. With hands placed on his chest, she thoughtlessly fiddled with the loose fabric. There was no denying the fact that she yearned for his embrace.

Kai threw his gaze into the dancing flames right next to them and took a deep breath. Her wandering fingers let his mind drift off. It provoked and left a tingling sensation that reached down to his thighs. He knew Eyre was nervous about what he might do and thus had to keep her at a distance.

However, he was too paralyzed and before he could react, Eyre managed to speak up.

“I’m tired… I want to get some rest,” she said, with a lingering shiver in her voice.

She knew from experience that Kai would not lay a hand on her, but she was also aware of the fact that he affected her. The superficial desires of lust and hunger always pinned her down with no way out. It was not always like this, but she felt bad for him whenever it happened.

Eyre pulled herself together and got up on her feet. He did nothing to hold her back and only watched her with regret. He watched her leave the living room with gritted teeth. Anger crawled up his spine, but not because she left him. On the contrary, he was relieved that she did not allow him to take it further. Yet, it was still painful, the chains that tamed him. At this point, it was like a never-ending war between nature and principles.

When Eyre reached the bedroom, she sat down on the bed. Her heart still fluttered in vain and her knuckles turned white from the firm grasp on the bedding. Since long ago, she had come to realize that the desires she felt in his embrace were not just his fault. It had taken months for it to even get to this point. They had been alone since late spring and his behaviour had only taken a turn after he confessed.

She looked out the window and tried to control her breathing to calm down. The moonlight bathed her in a pale light and she raised a knotted fist to her chest but jumped as soon as Kai knocked on the doorframe.

“I brought you some tea,” he said and avoided eye contact.

The scent of fresh mint filled the room in a matter of seconds. It took away any leftover tension and made her shoulders return to a relaxed position.

“Thank you,” she said and let her gaze fall into her lap.

Kai stepped in and placed the cup on the night table. She listened to the sound of his footsteps as he got closer. Yet, instead of sitting down on the bed, she felt a hand stroke her over the head, followed by a gentle kiss near her forehead.

A tear fell from her eye.

“Eyre?” he called, worried that he had done something wrong again.

“I’m so confused,” she wept.

However, Kai understood her struggle and sat down next to her. There were no words that could offer the comfort she needed.

“I know what you struggle with and that I’m of no help to you-,” she continued before an unexpected peck on the cheek cut her off.

“Get some rest,” he whispered.

Kai had a soft spot for Eyre. Regardless of what notion it belonged to, he never ceased to crave her presence. Her smile, her laughter, and the energy that surrounded her personality cast a spell on him and made him long for her touch, but it also forced him to be cautious around her. He feared that she would break if he got too close. That he would destroy her innocence by drowning her in the lust for flesh.

Even if he had to ache and suffer in her presence, he would never complain about it. Being next to her and keeping her safe was all that mattered. He wished to nurture and care for her the way he used to when her mother was still alive. He laid an arm around her shoulders and patted her with a gentle hand. At least this was still enough to quench just a part of his everlasting hunger.