unfortunately, that fear is my life. it's not a fear for me. it's a reality.
every time I complain about this, people tell me that it's not a big deal and yeah they're probably right. but this kind of thing happens every school year in 99% of activities (not just science labs) where I had to choose a partner.
no hard feelings to the people who rejected me, of course. (especially the person in the first panel, who was my only friend in the class...) they certainly have no duty to always be there for me; I can't control their lives and I'm happy for them befriending more people than me lol.
but this kind of thing happens so many times that I'm starting to wonder if it's because of me. if it's because I'm just not a very good person. I'm never anyone's first choice, not even second or third. people find better people than me. i'm the leftovers.
I cannot count the number of times I had to shyly go up to the teacher and tell him/her that I don't have a lab partner because no one was willing to partner up with me.
I'm too sad to do any of my homework now. I just want to sleep and just get the year over with.
oh god this really strikes a chord. i feel bad offering advice for things like this when it's so hypocritical of me to say, but please keep telling yourself that it has nothing to do with you as a person--because it's true. Trust me.
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