Letter 1.

No sender.

Dying inside your ocean…

I don't think I have my feet centered on the ground, sometimes I just want to live inside a painting because I feel bad inside my own skin, however, the world makes me feel my heart in my throat and that even when it is beautiful on the outside, it is totally rotten inside...

I have confused time and it seems that for many years I have only been living because I am breathing; Even when I sleep I feel something whispering in my ear what I should do, where I should look: up, down, but it won't let me sleep, it's a ghost, a succubus or a spectre... I'd like to know so I can ask it why it takes so long to let me cross, it seems I can't win the lottery of time...

In the field of love I lost, I have lead in my soul, so much so that if there is someone who is chosen correctly it's not me, so that feeling that there is someone else inside my own skin sometimes becomes so unbearable, that if I ask the stars:  ¿is this other person that I carry inside as beautiful as you?

I want you to lend me your eyes because mine have exhausted all their tears; There are things that time cannot erase, and as much as I do not wish for it, that stone with which I have been hit before reappears from time to time to show me that I will not be free from its bonds…

I don't know, my heart keeps pumping, so I hope that if one day I die they hide my corpse because I don't want to be found, I don't want to be linked to anything or anyone, I just want to be able to live in the memory of time even if it is not within one of the three kingdoms; I want to ask myself in the reflection of the river of the Immortals…

¿ Why do I live, why do I laugh, why do I cry and why is it so painful to breathe and have this memory…?

It seems that I have come from another world and every night the voice that does not allow me to fall asleep makes me put my feet on the ground as if the other side of the bed was full, but or just me occupying it..

I'm worried, not because of the external beauty, but because I think I've lost a little of my sanity and my connection with reality feels fragmented, and because of that…

 I can't see everything with the same eyes anymore because they're not children sleeping in the stars, but devourers who are following my steps and rummaging through my thoughts, so I've closed the door and I've been left with my own echo inside my mind…

In my dreams I've traveled to reality a thousand times, as if I could kiss your lips, as if everything were real… maybe, I should walk outside your door, but I wonder if when I touch the sound in your heart it will be too late, or maybe you'll ask me,...¿ am I the one you're looking for?

I wish I could hug you to make myself believe that you're real and it's not a delirium that in the middle of the night confuses my soul, distorts my mind and disturbs my heart…

Maybe, I have to admit that you're everything I've wanted Sky; My arms remain open because you know how to make me cry with so much feeling because it feels like our souls dance to the same rhythm of a single melody…

While I sleep it seems like even the moon itself mentions you in a whisper: Zhuhang, like the comfort of a candle in the ocean, but at the same time I know that time for me this season will pass as if we were running slowly, as if I were frozen without being able to doubt that you are the ocean in which I want to die...

I want to say so many things at once, but the truth is that the only thing I can sum it all up with is a simple…I love you…

With love;

Who is still waiting for you…