Arc 1, Chapter 16

I woke covered in a cold sweat with my heart pounding and my mind empty. It took me a few long moments before my surroundings came into focus and my panic began to fade. I was alone in the tent – right, I was somewhere outside the temple. My racing heart calmed at the realization. I must have fallen asleep soon after the doctor had left.

I stretched, trying to ease the cramped sense of soreness in my spine. I felt good, better than I usually did so soon after a Ceremony. My fever was gone, and my mind was clear. The cot I was lying in suddenly felt unbearably stuffy. I eased my way out, trying to be quiet (why exactly, I had no idea), and smoothed the covers behind me. The bedding really was much more luxurious than anything I had had before, the blankets silky smooth and soft and the pillows stuffed with down. A strange emotion caught in my throat and it took a moment for me to swallow it back down.

Alright, so I was in unfamiliar territory, and if I had learned anything from the adventure novels I had read before, the first thing to do in this situation was to take stock of my surroundings. The tent was quite large, slightly larger than my room back at the temple. The bedding was not the only thing that was high quality – everything in the tent was simple, yes, but clearly well-made and presumably quite expensive. The rug was thick and clearly made of high-quality wool, and the desk and chairs were carved from a reddish, lacquered wood that might have been mahogany. I was no merchant, of course, and book learning could only get one so far when it came to appraising items, but I also had plenty of visions to supplement my theoretical knowledge. I was confident that my assessment was correct – I was surrounded by treasures.

I looked down at myself, and realized I was wearing an unfamiliar gown too, also of much higher quality than my own clothes. It was a deep green color, much like the princess’s eyes. It was also a big too big, and the fabric felt like silk – wait. Was this actually the princess’s? Had they given me her clothes, of all things?

So, I’m being treated well, but we are in a hurry?

They were giving me the best they had, which presumably were things usually used by Princess Rhiannon. Second-hand clothing from a candidate for the imperial throne. Bizarre.

I recalled Captain Oesten’s explanation from when I had first awoken up.

"You are with the entourage and guards of Princess Rhiannon, including myself and the rest of the Second Company. We are two days ride outside of the temple, on the road towards the northern border. Your prophecy did not give a date, so a decision was made to travel immediately and join the rest of the Second Company on the way. Princess Rhiannon will depart with her attendants for the Capital when we reach –"

Sighing, I moved over to a chair near the desk and sat down heavily, my knees feeling a bit weak. Everything here was incredibly unfamiliar, and I did not know what to make of these people’s careful and seemingly caring treatment of me. Honestly speaking, I had no reason to assume Captain Oesten and Princess Rhiannon even shared all the same goals. I got precious little gossip about imperial politics inside the temple, and I did not even know exactly who the captain was within the aristocracy.

Sitting in this very comfortable tent somewhere miles and miles from everything familiar, it struck me how powerless I still was. I had gotten my dearest wish by leaving the temple. Of course, I had only done so by gambling on these mysterious people, and I still did not know exactly what they wanted from me. They could send me back at any moment. The fact remained that I was still not strong enough to run away if I wanted or needed to.

I put my head between my knees, breathing slowly in and out. I was not completely powerless. They still needed me for something. I was still useful. That meant I could bargain with them.

I should focus on what they need. I’ll keep acting as the Saintess and eventually help them find the real one on the condition they help me stay safe afterwards. Maybe I can destroy Kielan and the temple in the process… really, the true Saintess doesn’t need a temple to protect the empire, right? And these two clearly hate the temple too…

I was a bit shocked by my own thoughts. I had only recently been able to truly admit to myself that I hated Kielan and the Temple, but it still felt wrong. I was the real problem, after all. It was all because I was a fake.

Nevertheless, I knew in my bones that I wanted to see the Grand Temple fall. It had felt so good watching the captain and the princess verbally trample on Kielan and the High Priest.

How could I feel both things? If I deserved what they had done to me, then I should not want to see them brought down; if they truly deserved retribution, then I should… what, exactly? What should I do?

There was something about the conversation I had had with the doctor that had loosened up my twisted heart. It was not exactly a relief though. Rather, I could now sense a vast sea of rage and grief under the surface. If I untwisted everything completely, would it swallow me?

I sighed deeply. Resolving this internal conflict of mine would take time and information. I was not going to get anywhere by hiding in this tent. It was time to learn all the things the priests had hidden from me. I was good at that, after all; all those years trapped in the temple, I had been powerless except for my ability to collect information from my visions and the library. Outside the temple I would need to use new methods to gather knowledge, but my overall strategy would be the same.

I stood up quickly, disregarding the head rush as I stumbled and grabbed the robe folded on the bedside table. It was also made of green silk. Shrugging it on, I glanced at the similarly beautiful slippers sitting neatly by the cot. It was probably muddy outside after all the rain.

In the end, I left the slippers, unable to accept the thought of them soaked in mud. I could always just wash my feet, but I knew from experience how much harder it was to clean stained fabric than it was to wipe mud off skin.

Taking a deep breath, I poked my head out the tent flaps. It was cloudy and drizzling, but it seemed the worst of the rain had stopped. It was impossible for me to tell exactly how long I had slept with the overcast sky, but at the very least it was not night yet.

The camp was full of noise and activity. Knights with the emblem of the Second Company rushed around between uniformed imperial guards. There was an open space with flattened grass where at least one tent had been dismantled, and a small group made up of a few riders and a carriage were gathered on the outskirts of the camp.

There was an element of chaos in the activity; I had seen a fair number of military encampments in my visions over the years, and I could tell something had disrupted the planned operation here. I could not sense any panic or danger though, so I went ahead and started walking around, trying to keep to the sides of the paths so as to be out of the way.

I moved slowly, trying to stay unnoticeable for as long as I could. The cold grass and mud felt soothing on my bare feet and the light rain cooled my face. It was refreshing. A shout from the vicinity of the carriage drew my attention, and I saw a slender figure in the purple and green vestments of the imperial guards running toward an ornate tent.

“Your Highness, we are ready!”

I ducked behind the corner of a stack of crates on impulse, then immediately felt like a fool. What was I doing? Was skulking crouched in bushes and behind corners a new habit of mine?

The tent flapped open, and out strode the princess, looking as regal and self-assured as ever. Pretty much the exact opposite of how I felt, muddy and dressed in oversized clothes as I hid from everyone. She took control of the situation without skipping a beat, the imperial guards moving quickly to load items onto the horses and wagons standing outside the camp.

So she was leaving, then? There were a few people from the Second Company moving around as well, but none of them seemed to be readying anything to leave. That was not exactly what the Captain had said would happen. Had I been asleep too long, or had something happened? I thought Princess Rhiannon needed something from me before she left. I had not exactly been eager to talk to her about all that but now that my head felt clearer I was certain that avoiding the conversation was not going to help anyone.

Just as I was considering running over to offer whatever it Her Highness needed from me, someone grabbed my shoulder.

“And what exactly are you doing here?”