An Insincere Idol’s Blank Slate

Chapter 5

“They’ll be performing for Arario TV and Showdown soon, too.”

“See you at the local Bokbunja* Festival, pfft!”

(*a type of fruit wine)

“Ah, you crazy kid. You crack me up.”

Before I could even exit the waiting room, I heard someone snickering behind me. I saw Yehyun clench his fists in front of me. Dobin was also next to me biting his lip.

But instead of frowning, I flashed a kind smile.

You foolish mortals are unaware of your own future.

In three years, the pair who mocked us would face criminal charges for driving under the influence and marijuana possession. One of them received a one-year jail term for a DUI while still on probation. The other got a ten-month sentence with two years of probation for smoking marijuana.

I’ll see you guys in the newspaper.

In fact, before the regression, I had performed for Arario TV, Showdown, the local Bokbunja Festival, the chili pepper festival, the Korean beef festival, and a variety of special product festival stages, so their taunting had no impact on me.

Surely, anything is preferable to being incarcerated, isn’t it?

“Hey, have you guys lost your mind?” said the mid-career group’s manager, but the two soon-to-be prisoners couldn't stop giggling and exchanging sarcastic remarks.

“What? It’s just so obvious.”

“He’s right, it’s not like we haven’t seen rookies before.”

The leader quickly ushered us out of the waiting room and then followed us to express regret on behalf of his group. “I’m sorry, they’re still immature.”

“Hmm, it appears that they are well beyond the age of maturity... If they’re still behaving like children, they should seek psychiatric help—agh!”

The leader’s demeanor shifted in response to what I said as Hajoon gave me a shove and made me bid farewell. Then he pulled me to our designated meeting area with Yehyun. When we reached the communal idols waiting area, I noticed the somber expressions of the rest of our group members.

If it had just been us, we would have motivated each other to succeed and trample those other guys later, but showing disrespect to senior colleagues in front of other groups was a fast track to becoming professional pariahs. Particularly if those cursed (literally) seniors were going to stick around for another three years.

I silently patted the back of our youngest member, who was grumbling.

“We’re not really going to have to perform on Arario TV, are we…?” muttered Dobin in a voice so small that the other teams couldn’t hear.

Before my regression, our second album had failed and we’d headed to Arario TV. That had given me plenty of time to focus on composing and producing.

“We’re not. Don’t worry, we’re not going to,” I assured them.

The destiny of the unsuccessful idol ahead was about to take a different course, thanks to the return of talented composer Yoon Eden. And in order to end the regression, we couldn’t be failed idols.

“Really? The next song will be better than this one, right?” Dobin asked sincerely.

Before I could confirm, it was our turn to go onstage. While executing the familiar choreography onstage, I pondered our future as Dobin’s part played in the background.

The stars in the universe are twinkling

The eyes in front of me are twinkling too

Even to my ears, it sounded like we were bound for Arario TV.

Upon completing our performance and heading back to the dorm, I was met with a shower of praise and congratulatory gestures. “Eden, you showed great restraint.”

“Yeah, nice job, Eden. You maintained your composure. I was worried about you causing a scene in the waiting area.”

I just blinked at them. I had planned to offer solace to the hurt members as their group leader, so why were they praising me instead? I suspected that the event had taken place in the past, before the regression...

“Who the f*ck are those bastards?”

“Agh, Eden! Watch your mouth!”

There was a specific explanation for why, among all the various incidents and accidents, I distinctly remembered the destiny of those two guys. Prior to the regression, and unaware of their destiny, I had been unable to tolerate their presence and ended up swearing at them in the waiting room. That had resulted in ongoing issues with anyone who knew about the situation.

Even after we rose to fame, thanks to a fan recording, those guys who harassed us went ahead... to prison.

I had avoided cursing in the waiting room this time, so those prison-bound bastards wouldn’t cause any more trouble for us.

***

“What if only sixty-two people show up at our fan meet-and-greet?” asked Yehyun, reclined on a mattress with his face covered in a sheet mask, as usual.

His comment came from seeing the disappointing number of voters participating in the fan-club name poll on the official fan blog. Despite having 172 fan club members, his anxiety spiked as only sixty-two individuals cast their votes.

“We’d be lucky if a total of sixty-two fans actually showed up,” I replied.

I was busy entering the fan blog to vote for Daydream (the name used by the fandom before the regression). The group’s nickname was Ilmong, which was the last two letters of the Korean word meaning “daydream.” Ilmong didn’t feel familiar to me, possibly because I had always referred to them as Daydream. Naturally, I had no intention of using their nickname when they had a perfectly good name, so the unfamiliarity of the nickname was no reason to worry.

“‘Nikes’ is nice too, no?”

“Ohh, Goddess of Fandom Nicknames.”

Hajoon decided to abandon “Nikes” and support “Daydream” when I showed him identical comments on the fan blog that echoed his own words. After that, I racked my brain to create a two-line post with persuasive language and uploaded it to the fan blog. It was the fourth post I had uploaded that week.

[- Upload selfies and posts to the fan blog FROM’s bulletin board at least 4x a week (4/4)]

[Sincerity Level +2]

Out of nowhere, Jaehee barged in with Dobin, hollering at full volume. “Guys! Vote for ‘Nikes’!”

“Jaehee, how many times do I have to tell you to knock before entering someone else’s room?” scolded Yehyun, the oldest member of the team and secretly a bit of an old fart.

I rolled over on the bed and asked, “Dobi, did you vote? You didn’t vote for ‘Nikes,’ did you?”

“Can you please say my name correctly?” he grumbled.

Meanwhile, Hajoon seized Jaehee and attempted to persuade him that if “Nikes” was picked, the fan community should be dubbed goddesses. Of course, his persuasion didn’t work at all.

“What’s wrong with the nickname ‘goddesses’? Our Goddesses—” Jaehee continued.

“The fans would probably freak out because it’s a bit much,” I said.

I shook my head while watching Jaehee repeat a fandom nickname that likely wouldn’t catch on over and over while resting his head on his hands. After plopping down on the bed and checking the fan blog for votes, Jaehee looked at me with surprise written all over his face, as though he had noticed my posts.

“Eden, what’s up with you posting on the fan blog so consistently? It seems out of character.”

Oh, that’s the way it went down.

I needed to restore my Sincerity Level. I nodded casually as I secretly confirmed that two sincerity points had been added to my Sincerity Level. At the stroke of midnight, the clock switched from 11:59 P.M. to 12:00 A.M., and the status window popped up in front of me.

[*Starting weekly quest evaluation…]

[Penalties will be imposed because you failed to complete two weekly quests]

Wait, did I forget to check fan reactions today…?

It had completely slipped my mind. I was about to relax, thinking that the penalties wouldn’t be a big deal, when…

“Ooof!”

I covered my mouth as an intense heat rose inside me, and something fishy-smelling rushed up my throat, but I couldn’t avoid letting it out. A crimson liquid trickled between my fingers.

The moment I realized what I had vomited, my face went pale, and my hands started shaking.

This is unbelievable.

“Aagh! Blood! I vomited blood!” I shouted, raising my bloodstained hands.

Every members’ attention shifted towards me at once. They stared blankly at me, as if it didn’t feel real to them.

Hajoon came to his senses first. “Are you sure you didn’t bite your tongue by accident?” he asked. “Or did you regurgitate blood from a nosebleed?”

Seemingly in direct response to his question, blood surged up my throat once more, and the fishy smell of blood filled my mouth.

Is this system evil?

I never imagined it would have an impact on my health, but here it was making me vomit blood?

Oh my, the system is trying to kill me! It’s killing me just because I forgot to check fan reactions one time!

“911! Hurry and dial 911! I’m dying! If I don’t receive treatment on time, I’ll die!”

While I writhed on the ground and caused a commotion, Jaehee used his mobile phone to make the call. “Manager, Eden suddenly vomited blood! What? He’s freaking out, so I don’t think he’s going to pass out...”

The rest of the guys were trying to relax me by offering water and passing me wet towels.

“Hey, Eden, calm down! If you keep moving like that, the blood could block your airway and put you in even greater danger!”

“Stop telling me to relax and call 911! We’re losing precious minutes here!”

“No, you need to calm down first. Eden, let’s get you off the floor and get you into a seated position.”

“I looked it up on the internet and it says hemoptysis can be a symptom of gastritis. It could just be gastritis, Eden. Other possibilities are pulmonary tuberculosis or necrotizing pneumonia...”

After looking up symptoms of hemoptysis on his smartphone and rattling off a list of diseases, Dobin paused and awkwardly turned toward me. “But c-come on. I don’t think you’re dealing with any of those issues because your lung capacity is good.”

“‘Tuberculosis’? ‘Necrotizing pneumonia’? Call 911!” I cried.

Within seven minutes, the manager threw open the dormitory door and rushed in. “Eden, are you suffering from health issues?”

“No! That’s why this is even more concerning! Symptoms with unknown causes pose a greater risk!”

Our manager took me straight to the ER, where I debated whether I should be thankful that no one recognized me as an idol. The system must have found it unbearable to witness me trembling, causing a scene, and asserting that I was near death.

[The hemoptysis penalty doesn’t result in any physical issues]

Bullsh*t, damn it. How could vomiting blood not cause any physical harm?

***

The in-depth health assessment revealed everything was in order. Their findings did not justify a hospital admission. Despite that, I was skeptical about the results, so I arranged for a full checkup and was released the same day.

“Ugh, my throat hurts.” I grumbled, rubbing my neck every time I swallowed.

Hajoon handed me some warm water and asked, “Is it because you vomited blood?”

“No, it’s because I screamed so much. But how can I be fine when I vomited a bucket of blood?”

“Come on, it wasn’t a bucketful…” he said softly.

It was strange. It had seemed like a large amount to me. Despite the damn system’s assurance that it wouldn’t harm my body, continuously vomiting blood was bound to impact my health.

I had to complete at least two weekly quests from then on.

Jaehee was seated beside me as I added vitamins and supplements to my online shopping cart. “Eden, did you vomit blood after seeing the first impression of our album?” he asked cautiously.

“What?! Why would I vomit blood over something like that? Am I some fictional character in a novel or a comic strip?”

He grumbled and I paused as I brushed back my messy bangs.

Wait. Now that I think about it, how many copies have been sold? Is it at least over 1,000?

The “first impression” referred to the sales volume for the first week after the release of an album. Before the regression, I remembered having first impressions in the tens of thousands. I tried to prepare myself for the number a failed idol group would have before I glanced at Jaehee’s phone screen.

I saw the first impression with the last two digits marked with asterisks. The first impression of Reve’s debut album was… 1,0**.

1,000 copies. What the heck?

Even on a second look, the number was still shocking enough to cause my blood to rush into my throat once more. In the beginning, we were such a disappointment.

With our initial album confirmed a complete disaster, it didn’t feel right to sit back and do nothing.