3. Soul
Mar 02, 2025
Eldritch Troubadour
Top comment
The premisse looks interesting and I see you went through great lengths to think about all the characters and make them unique.
But I feel like the pacing is too fast, with Mia accepting everything way too quickly, not to mention a lot of exposition in very little time.
I think with a slower pace and letting the audience breath and get to know these characters just a bit more could help immensely. But what you do already have is intriguing enough for me to keep following.
And remember, this is just my opinion. Hope you keep writing and continuing to improve.
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For years, the rebel faction *Stellar* has waged war against *Starcity*, a powerful robotic syndicate that has destroyed humanity. But despite their relentless efforts, *Stellar* has never stood a chance. Outmatched in strength, strategy, and technology, their resistance is on the brink of collapse.
In a desperate bid to change the course of history, *Stellar* sends one of their best fighters, Mike, back in time. His mission: find Mia—a girl believed to be able to save humanity —and train her before *Starcity* can tighten its grip on the world. However, the Mia he meets is far from the warrior they need. She is young, untrained, and unaware of the fate that awaits her.
With *Stellar* on the verge of annihilation, this is their last chance. Can Mia become the savior the rebels believe her to be, or is humanity doomed to fall under *Starcity’s* rule forever?
In a desperate bid to change the course of history, *Stellar* sends one of their best fighters, Mike, back in time. His mission: find Mia—a girl believed to be able to save humanity —and train her before *Starcity* can tighten its grip on the world. However, the Mia he meets is far from the warrior they need. She is young, untrained, and unaware of the fate that awaits her.
With *Stellar* on the verge of annihilation, this is their last chance. Can Mia become the savior the rebels believe her to be, or is humanity doomed to fall under *Starcity’s* rule forever?
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