On the drive there I listen to music; upbeat, pop tunes. The music would usually bring me joy, but right now I can't help but feel like I'm forgetting something and I'm fixating on that. Going over lists in my head. 

Watch. Keys. Wallet. Purse. Lunch. Scrubs. Coffee. Water. Nope. I got all that.

A car zooming across shocks me into reality just in time to notice the red light directly above. I stop extremely short on the brakes. Cars beep behind me and pure adrenaline runs in my veins. Just how dazed was I?

When the light turns green I decide to use it as a metaphor to change the day's tone and get out of this funk. I shake my upper body and roll off the tension in my shoulders. I'm going to be there soon. 

Turning down a few side streets, a welcoming feeling comes as I put my sights on the place. Mayfaire Hospital. It looks like a huge old Victorian house. It's more gorgeous in person than the photos on the internet. Never been inside since my interview was via a video call. It's surprising that this is a psych hospital and not a vintage hotel or something. It seems like a really high quality place. 

Finally that bubbling excitement I've been looking for all morning arrives. I park in the designated reserved spot I was told on the phone, number 138. Not too far away, not too close, but I'm glad it isn't further. Turning the keys out of the ignition the music stops abruptly.

Getting out of the car into the cold breeze is already numbing my face. I check my watch, 9:43.

Approaching the entrance, the automatic doors slide open. I’m hit by the smell of cleaner and view of a janitor mopping the wooden floor in the main entrance lobby. It truly looks like an old fashion hotel. A beautiful reddish persian rug in the middle of the room. There's a few people in scrubs walking in and out of the lobby from hall to hall, already so much hustle and bustle, which elates me more.

I walk over to the receptionist's desk in the left hand corner of the room and wait for the woman to get off the phone. She’s a middle aged lady with light blonde streaks in her dirty blond bob styled hair.  

“Okay, okay, no problem, hold on one moment.” She covers the bottom of the phone and turns her attention “Who are you?” she asks, looking above her slid down glasses. Her eyes are a piercing bright blue.

“I’m Elle---Ellette, I’m one of the new hires.” I reply with a smile and the woman's face brightens with recognition but puts finger up to motion to wait a second.

“Yes, yes, but it’s not my problem. That has to do with Jackie, not me.” She says in a huff. "Okay, alright, bye." She hangs up. She has an accent, Boston maybe? Yet it's high pitched and light, motherly even.

She finally hangs up and smiles. “Aaannnyway! Hello, I’m Annalise. I'm the main receptionist here, so I’ll be seeing you a lot! After these set of doors, you’ll head to the recreation room. You just need to follow the signs on the ceiling to meet up with everyone!” She smiles brightly, and I can't help but think she seems really kind. I can recognise her voice as the person on the phone explaining the tour and training.

“Thank you!” I curtly smile back at her and go to head off when I remember, “Oh! Is there any place I can put my lunch?” I lift my little lunch box sheepishly. The woman laughs.

“People typically eat here in the cafeteria, we’re super lucky it's actually good food here. But it’s okay, I can take it off your hands and bring it to the break room fridge for ya!” She grabs it and puts it down on her desk.

“Really? Thank you so much!” 

“Okay. I'm just going to buzz you in. Head in right through those doors in the middle. Good luck today!” 

“Oh, thank you once again!”

The double doors in the middle have a red light above turn green and buzzes. They swing open slowly. It's met with a small room with another pair of doors and some gruff guy (seems to be wearing a security outfit) sitting in the small room between the doors buzzes me in again after the first set of doors close.

 Finally out into the other side, I see three paths of hallways I can take. There's signs above in fancy lettering. Left says in different rows 'cafeteria’ ‘patient rooms’ ‘bathrooms’ middle hall says ‘art room’ ‘group rooms’ ‘trauma unit’ ‘out patient’ ‘seclusion rooms’ and the right says  ‘outside’ ‘theater’ and finally ‘recreation room.’