Elinora hesitated for a moment. Her heart was beating so hard, she was afraid. She didn't know what was happening and what the consequences of her actions would be, but she was determined to help Alaric no matter what.
"I'm sorry, Your Grace, but I can't leave you like this. I'm coming in," she told her Duke Alaric and opened the door.
The room was dark with the only light coming in through the door she had just opened. Alaric lay on the floor, hunched over and with his eyes closed, covering his ears with his hands. Cold sweat was drenching him and he looked like he was in pain.
Elinora ran to him and leaned over him.
"Are you all right?" she asked him.
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She called him two or three more times but he did not answer her. Until his face calmed, though it didn't stop looking like it hurt, and he looked at her. He was exhausted and his breathing was unsteady.
"I told you to leave," he said, his voice barely coming out.
But Elinora didn't hear him. She got up and turned on the two lamps she found in the room to provide light.
She then tried to lift him on her shoulders and carry him to the bed at the far end of the room. She grabbed his arm and put it around her shoulders to support him against her.
"You don't have to..." he whispered, but his voice trailed off before he could finish his sentence.
However, Elinora once again ignored him and continued with all her strength to try and carry him to the bed. She carefully laid him down and covered him with the blanket. Then she went to the desk and took the jug of water.
"I'll be right back," he said and left, leaving Alaric alone.
She ran as fast as she could to the kitchen. She got a tray and after pouring water from the tap into the pitcher she placed it on the tray. Then she took a small basin and a glass and put them on the tray as well.
When he returned to the room nothing had changed. Alaric was lying on the bed and, though he seemed to have calmed down more, he was pale.
Elinora went to turn on the one lamp that had gone out, when suddenly Alaric grunted and covered his ears with his hands.
She immediately approached him and tried to talk to him.
"Your Grace, what is the matter with you? Do you hear something?" she asked him anxiously.
"I hear whispers, there are whispers everywhere," he said, and cold sweat washed over him again.
Then Elinora grabbed his hands and pulled them out of his ears. She turned his head toward her so he could look at her.
She remembered the nights when she had nightmares. Edmund was always by her side, comforting her just like that. He would turn her head to look at him and say beautiful and comforting words to them. That was what she intended to do to the man in front of her, it was all she could do.
"Listen to me. Focus on my voice, block everything else out., she said quietly but firmly.
"No, they never go away no matter what I do," Alaric replied, looking away.
"You know, I had a brother."
"You had a brother?"
"Yeah, and when we were little, every time I had nightmares he would tell me to look at him and just focus on him. Then I would forget about the nightmares and talking to him for a while would put me to sleep peacefully and calmly. So I may not know what is happening to you but if you want we can talk until you are calm."
Alaric hesitated a moment but finally turned his gaze back to her.
"Tell me about him," he said calmly.
"He was... my best friend," said Elinora hesitating a little.
She hadn't realized how difficult it was for her to talk about Edmund, perhaps because she hadn't been given the opportunity to do so before.
But for some reason she wanted to talk about him. She had taken his place and pretended to be him so she had to hide the fact that he was dead. Her parents seemed to have forgotten about him since the fatality happened.
No one seemed to remember him except her.
But there, in the North, no one knew them. She could talk about him all she wanted, so that someone other than herself could remember him.
"We were twins, but we were different characters..." she felt a weight on her chest.
She took a deep breath, preparing to finally say the words she had kept locked away for so long.
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