“Well… guess it's time to go home tomorrow,” I sighed happily as I lay in bed, looking down at Beau who was fiddling with his phone, “what are you doing?”

“Texting my mama to let her know we'll be back in two days. They watched your last competition and the ceremony to get your medals. We've all been doing it after all. I just got to see it in person again. I love watching you vault,” he smiled at me and I reached down. Beau immediately pressed his palm to mine when I did and we sat there quietly. We had done this every night for the last three days and I found it relaxing, knowing he wouldn't say anything if I pulled away quickly.

“You have really soft hands for someone who does jiu-jitsu,” I whispered.

“I wrap my hands,” he whispered back, “no surprise yours are so calloused.”

“I suppose vaulting for ten years left them that way.”

“Are you going to continue after the Olympics are over?”

“No,” I laughed softly, hooking my index finger around his to practice what it would be like to hold his hand without my gloves, “I have to focus on being a pediatrician after all. School is going to be my priority for the next 8 years.”

“Hey?” He chewed his lip and I nodded, “When I'm ready to graduate and go to university with you, can I move into your apartment?”

“I thought that was implied. I'm already intending to get an extra bed to replace the couch so you can have that space.”

“Wait,” Beau sat up on the futon, his blanket slipping to his waist and revealing the fact he was shirtless, making my heart race, “I didn't need to ask?”

“Nope. Never. I want you there, Beau.”

“Well I feel stupid now for assuming you wouldn't,” he sighed, still letting me hold his finger and I laughed softly, “You're my best friend. I should have known you'd never turn me away.”

“You could skip university and still live with me. I'll take care of you. No different than you take care of me.”

“Really?”

“Mhm. But you want to help me run a clinic so you'll have to go to university to be a nurse.”

“Ah! Right,” he laid back down and I did the same, holding my extra pillow close, “Koa?”

“Hm?” I yawned loudly, my exhaustion from all of the interaction I'd been forced into today overwhelming.

“Never mind. I'll ask when we get home. You're crashing on me right now.”

“Can I keep holding your hand?”

“Absolutely.”

We reached Christchurch two days later, my parents groaning the entire time about how uncomfortable sleeping in tiny beds had been for them. I couldn't relate to this as I had never slept. Beau was right about us having just enough room that if he moved in his sleep he wouldn't accidentally touch me but having him that close, sleeping soundly in one of my sweaters had been more than my heart could handle and I found myself watching him, hoping he was sleeping well instead of resting myself.

“I have never been happier to be back home,” I grumbled, climbing into Alexander’s truck.

“We’re happy you’re back,” Erica smiled, “were you good for them Beau?”

“Yeah. Of course I was,” Beau snorted, poking his mom on the shoulder as she sat in the back seat with us, “is Mama back?”

“Tomorrow,” she nodded as I leaned against the window, putting my headphones on and closing my eyes, “didn’t sleep, Koa?”

“No,” I shook my head, “I haven’t slept in two days.”

“But… I made sure there was room for you,” Beau gasped.

“Just couldn’t fall asleep. Don’t worry about it.”

“Okay.”

We rode back home, Erica and Beau talking with my parents the entire time and I was grateful to have my headphones as I was doing my best to fall asleep. The house appeared twenty minutes later and as soon as the truck was parked, I climbed out and headed inside after saying goodbye to Beau. My parents watched me confused but didn’t try to stop me and I climbed into my bed, finally settled enough to sleep.

“Koa?” a soft knock came on my door and I sat up, wiping drool from my cheek, “Hey. It’s Dad.”

“Oh,” I yawned, stumbling over to open it, “what is it?”

“Just worried. You’ve been asleep for a day and a half. I made dinner. Do you want to come down and eat?”

My stomach growled and I snorted before nodding and following him downstairs, “Thanks, Dad.”

“Always. Your apartment is ready by the way.”

“Thanks. That means the world to…”

My voice died as I found Beau sitting at the dining table, happily eating chicken and rice as he talked to Alexander. I took a seat next to Beau and he wiggled, smiling at me.

“Hey, sleepy head.”

“Hi Beau,” I smiled, grabbing my plate when Caelan set it in front of me, “Dad?”

“Yeah?”

“It’s touching,” I pointed at my food and he sighed, making me chew my lip, “never mind. I’ll eat it.”

“Koa… I didn’t mean.”

“It’s fine. I’m sorry for being difficult.”

I left the plate and went upstairs to change my clothes and grab my keys and camera. Caelan had followed me, waiting outside my room and I headed to the entryway, wanting to leave for a while.

“Where are you going?” Caelan gasped.

“Beach.”

“But… Koa you haven’t eaten…”

“I’ll get myself something. Thanks,” nodding, I fixed my jacket and Beau came running over to me.

“Can I come with you?”

“Sure.”

Beau left the house with me, Caelan staring at us and I waved, hoping this would dispel his concern or possible anger at me for wasting food. I rarely ate anything if it touched and he was aware of this. I hadn’t meant to be rude about it, but his reaction to it had hurt my feelings.

“Koa?” Beau whispered as I pulled away, “Why are we leaving?”

“My feelings are hurt and I didn’t want to retreat to my room. I know I’m difficult. It’s hard on my parents to have two such different kids. Kaia is perfect. Then you have me. I can’t touch them after a while and Alexi loves to hug. I can’t talk to them for long without the sound bothering me. Every time Caelan cooks he has to be thoughtful and make me something separate. I’m not easy and I know that. I don’t want to fucking be this way,” I slammed my palm against the steering wheel, “I just want to be normal!”

“Koa,” Beau looked at me confused and I wiped my eyes quickly as I crossed through a green light, “look out!” he shouted and I turned my head, unable to react in time when another car plowed into the driver's side of my car, flipping us, and the world went dark for a while as I lost consciousness.

The smell of burning rubber woke me up and I groaned, trying my best to right myself but my head was screaming, blood blocking one of my eyes.

“B-Beau? Beau, are you okay?” I stuttered out, trying to sit up, “Beau!”

“I’m here,” he called and I turned my head to find him lying 20 feet to my left and I realized we had both been tossed from my car, “I can’t move, Koa. My leg is broken. It’s okay!”

“I-I don’t feel super good, Beau,” my voice shook as I looked around and realized why. I was losing blood at a rapid rate from my shoulder. Or what had been my shoulder. Instead, I followed the trail of blood and found my right arm pinned under the hood of my car but I was no longer attached to it, “wh-what?”

“Sir,” a soft voice called and I turned to see a beautiful older woman, her hair greying, eyes as green as a forest as she kneeled next to me, throwing a medical bag onto the ground, “What’s your name?”

“K-Koa,” I stuttered out, “I’m so cold…”

“It’s going to be okay. Do your best to not panic and stay awake.”

“Beau!” I cried out.

“I’m okay! I’ll see you later okay?”

“Beau,” I kept crying as I watched the ambulance leave with him, “tell me he’s okay. Please!"

“His leg is broken and he has a deep cut on his chest but he’s okay,” the paramedic smiled at me, “my name is Ruth.”

“Oh,” laughing, my tears continued to burn as they mixed with blood from my eye, “that was my grandma’s name. You’re going to save me, right Ruth?”

“I am. Stay awake. How old are you, Koa?”

“18. I just made the Olympics team for vaulting. But… I guess not anymore. You can’t reattach my arm, can you?”

“I’m not a doctor,” she kept working on me as more paramedics joined, “I need you to try not to move.”

“I have a sensory processing… p-processing… thing. Your touch is scaring me. It feels wrong.”

“I’m sorry but I have to or you’re going to bleed out.”

“I know. I’m fighting it down. Someone… someone needs to call my dads,” my vision blurred and I felt bile rise in my throat, “I’m going to vomit.”

“Shit,” she immediately jumped over me and another paramedic helped Ruth roll me onto my side as I started throwing up, “alright. We can’t leave him here. That’s a lot of blood. Load him up, we’re three minutes from Christchurch Hospital. Koa?” she shook me gently and I found myself unable to reply as I stared at an older man, his appearance the same as my father Alexander. He waved at me, coming closer and I smiled before shutting my eyes and falling asleep.

“What the hell do you mean you can’t reattach it!”

Shouting roused me and I opened my eyes, trying to look around the room but without my glasses, I was thoroughly confused, unable to understand where I even was.

“I keep telling you this! The damage to the arm itself was too extensive. It’s simply not possible. We closed up the area. Luckily, he has his shoulder cap so we’ll find a prosthetic that works well for him and allows Koa to keep living his life. Prosthetics have advanced tremendously in the last twenty years. Most are capable of feeling now and we use nodules for this that are surgically implanted under the skin. It reacts no differently than his true arm, but you can tell it’s a prosthetic as he’ll be able to remove it when he wishes by deactivating the magnets. It’s far better than what we used to rely on.”

“Where is Beau?” I croaked out, my voice hoarse as I squinted against the harsh lights, “is Beau alive?”

“K-Koa?” Caelan finally came into my eye line and I tried to smile, “Oh hi, baby,” he sniffled, pushing my hair from my forehead, “sorry.”

“Wait,” stuttering, I tried to grab my father before I remembered that I had truly lost my arm, “D-do that again.”

Caelan smiled, rubbing my forehead gently and I started to cry, “Koa?”

“Did I hit my head?”

“Yes,” another voice came close and I turned as best I could to find a doctor I recognized as he worked with my father Alexander on a regular basis.

“Hi, Dr. Miller,” I smiled, “you still work here?”

“I do,” he laughed softly, “why did you ask if you hit your head?”

“Because I don’t mind the sounds or my father touching me. Can hitting my head cause me to lose a disorder such as issues with processing my senses?”

“Mhm. We see it from time to time. The brain is odd. Even a small amount of trauma can change everything. The swelling has gone down, so I wouldn’t be surprised if you see changes. Your liver was lacerated, your arm was crushed and torn from your body when you were thrown from the vehicle, and you have severe road rash on your back and legs. You’ll be here for a few weeks. Then physical therapy once we do the surgery for your prosthetic.”

“Okay,” I relaxed again and Dr. Miller left the room once he checked my medication levels and entered something into my chart, “Dad?”

“Yes?” Caelan had never stopped playing with my hair or rubbing my forehead and I closed my eyes.

“I didn’t cause the accident.”

“We know. You’ve been in a medically induced coma for two weeks, Koa. The police already gave us the reports, you’re in the clear. Alexi has yelled at Luke every day about your arm.”

“You can’t vault anymore,” Alexander whispered, “you lost… your spot on the Olympic team.”

“Oh, I don’t care. I’m alive. Beau is alive. That’s what I care about. I don’t think I can be a pediatrician anymore, but I’ll figure something out. Tell me you gave up my apartment. Please. I can’t live alone for a while, I don’t want you paying for it.”

“We did,” Alexander came over and sat on my hospital bed before carefully putting my glasses on me, “we have to be careful, you have stitches under your right eye until tomorrow.”

“Is Beau… as bad?”

“Nope,” a familiar voice called and I looked over to the door to find Beau coming into the room on crutches, his left leg in a cast as Erica and Brooklyn followed after him, “my leg is shattered but with the surgery I already had and then physical therapy when I get my cast off, I’ll be fine. Your Dad is going to do it for me so we don’t need to pay. He’s still licensed after all.”

“You’re alive,” I whispered and Beau giggled, coming to stand by the bed, “thank God. I was so scared. I remember lying there after they took you away. I started throwing up blood and it got really cold. There was a man… he was so warm. He looked like you, Matua, but he was covered in scars. All over his face.”

“My Dad,” Alexander whispered, his eyes wide, “did you see Jacob?”

“Must have. Also, my paramedic, the lady who stopped me from dying of blood loss… her name was Ruth.”

“Oh,” he sniffled, kissing my forehead softly, “thank you, Lord. He sent my parents to you in some way. I prayed. For hours I sat here and prayed that God wouldn’t take you from us.”

“It wasn’t time yet. That’s all,” I shrugged, laughing at how odd it felt, “well… what does this mean?”

“We get you stable and healthy. Then go from there, figure out the future. Your family is here,” Brooklyn called and I smiled at her, “Kaia is pacing the waiting room like a beast.”

“I want to see them.”

She nodded and left with Erica, my parents following them as Beau finally sat down, his cast clanking loudly against the bed.

“Oh, I am so sorry! Is that too much?” he panicked and I reached over, grabbing his hand and squeezing as tightly as I could.

“It doesn’t bother me anymore. Dr. Miller said I hit my head and it could have changed me some. The sounds don’t bother me. This,” I lifted his hand for a moment, “doesn’t make me feel panicked. Come closer.”

Beau leaned over and I used my arm to pull him into a hug, “Koa!”

“I am so sorry but so glad you’re okay,” I whispered in his ear, “that was the only thing I cared about. If you had made it. Beau, will you keep being my friend? Even if I can’t take care of you in the future? I won’t be a doctor anymore, I’ll need to find a new career. Will you still stay at my side, even if it means things are changing?”

“Of course. You never had to ask. It was implied,” he laughed quietly, laying his head on my chest and making me hiss, “Ah! I forgot we have matching chest stitches. We got cut in the same spot from the glass, I am so sorry.”

“It’s okay,” I rubbed his back as he sat up, staring into my eyes, “your face is still so bruised…”

“Yeah. I hit it on the asphalt. Broke my nose. But it’s okay,” he pushed my hair away from my cheek and I turned my head to kiss his palm, “K-Koa?”

“When I’m… stable and home… can we talk?”

“Absolutely.”