Through the early mornings, Fuxiao and Topan travelled quickly on foot, further away from the barracks but not towards the Capital. Instead, the back alley town of Pure Dormants, Suar. It was instincts that pulled him towards the shadows, but Fuxiao found reprise in being with the thrown and forgotten.

Faced with the sudden bustle of the marketplace, Topan stood frozen. For ten years, he had been trapped alone in a nightmare and then detained in prison. The only people he had come into contact with were the Lord’s lackeys and the doctor who cut him up, so seeing a whole group of people who had no intentions of hurting or even acknowledging him threw him off. Perhaps they would scream and run if they knew who he truly was, but standing still, he was simply a lost traveller. He stood in a blind stupor, unable to breathe, with his instincts to kill barely suppressed.

“Come on.” Fuxiao appeared by his side and tugged on his arm. “Let’s get something to eat.”

Now that he was holding himself back from another rampage, Topan could only trust in Fuxiao. And he didn’t hesitate to do that. Fuxiao was the one who saved him, the one light in his world of darkness. If he had to, he would break his body for him.

“Don’t worry. I’m right here beside you. Being in a crowded place after so long is daunting, I know. But we will be fine together.”

The slender fingers intertwined with his thick rough ones, keeping their hands locked together so that neither of them could separate. Fuxiao navigated them through the crowds and reached a tavern. The atmosphere inside was as busy as outside. Loud chatterings, mugs clinking, the sound of living. They settled at the end of a long table and Fuxiao placed an order with the waitress.

Topan appeared perplexed when Fuxiao pulled out a small coin pocket.

“Those coins, where did you get them?” Topan said.

“A little sleight of hand.” Fuxiao hid the pocket back into his cloak.

“You’re quite brave, aren’t you?”

“It’s nothing, but more importantly…” The waitress placed a plate of meat skewers on their table. Fuxiao handed the meat skewers to Topan. “Here. You’re gonna try real meat, not hudoq meat.”

Topan stared at the rich brown colour. The smell of roast wafted in the air. A familiar smell. A smell he had long forgotten. That’s right. He used to be human. Even though he was a war orphan, he grew up in a village similar to this town. There were people, markets, good food, music, and so much life. Until everything was destroyed by the war and the plague.

The first bite blew his mind. It was a different taste to how they did it in his village but the rich juice of fresh meat was something his body relished in. For a split second, he felt like a human again. Like one of these people. Not a monster.

If he hadn’t run into Fuxiao, would he still be wandering the lands alone? With his eyes set on the ruined kingdom from which the plague originated from? Would he live with only the rage and hatred inside, fighting and killing everyday? And if the Cahayaranga Kingdom captured him again, would he just repeat his life as a prisoner and attempt to break free only to run into another bloodbath?

No.

Fuxiao took his hand.

Fuxiao walked alongside him.

Fuxiao gave him the chance to wake up and live.

Not as a monster, but as himself.

Topan gazed at his rough hands. No indications of the black stripes that came with his Bloodrush. His instincts weren’t on alert anymore. He didn’t have to protect himself from danger. Despite being surrounded by so many strangers, his Bloodline didn’t need to fight. It gave him a moment to feel like a human. A normal human.

“Ya think the army’s done with whatever happened?” The men at their table started a discussion.

“They should. They’re all Bloodliners, they can easily kill those hudoqs.”

“Yeah, yeah, let the monsters fight each other as long as they don’t come near us.”

Fuxiao carefully got their attention, “Excuse me. May I know more about that?”

The sudden question jolted Topan more than the men. “Why are you asking them?!” Topan whispered.

“Oh,” one of the men turned his attention to them. “You don’t look from around here.”

“Travellers.” Fuxiao simply said.

“Welcome to our humble town of Suar. We’re the chopped liver of the Cahayaranga Kingdom.” The men broke into a sarcastic jest. “The Royal Family and its surroundings are all Bloodliners who go to war against the other neighbouring Kingdoms while we Dormants are just here living our lives. Not like we’ll be any help against other Bloodliners in a battle.”

“They’ve been at war with the Central and West Kingdom since my grandfather’s days. Killing, dying… is winning the war worth that many lives lost?”

“Isn’t that mainly why the Bloodliners are decreasing in number? My uncle who works at the barracks heard them talk about it, how the inherited Bloodlines will soon disappear if they keep dying in battles.”

“Well… humans gotta survive, and fighting in wars isn’t it.”

“Anyway, the Bloodliners are naturally stronger than Dormants, so they're at the forefront of the defence against the hudoqs. We just sit back and keep the town running.”

“In a way, they’re not like us. Not normal. Like monsters.”

Topan paused eating, dark eyes glancing at the men warily. Monsters? Why did these men consider the soldiers monsters? Wasn’t Topan and the hudoqs the monster?

Under the table, Fuxiao’s hand gripped his.

To these people, the soldiers were monsters. To the soldiers, Topan was a monster. To Topan, the hudoqs were monsters. A cycle of madness that no one understood.

“What about you?” The men directed the question at Fuxiao. “You’re a traveller from the East, right? How is it there?”

The question took Fuxiao aback but he didn’t show it on his face. “I’m not sure. I don’t meddle with them much.” The lie slipped out of his lips without a second thought.

Topan’s dark eyes glanced at Fuxiao briefly before returning to the men. Throughout the ordeal, he realised how calm Fuxiao was, like a person who was used to the not so honest life. Topan may be a monster, but he remembered being human once. A long time ago. He was an honest man, dreaming of becoming a knight and protecting the people. He turned into a monster to protect them. But look where he ended up at.

“The people here don’t seem to favour the Royal Army, the Bloodliners.” Fuxiao commented.

The men shrugged. “Their business won’t affect us much aside from laws related to trading. They’re more interested in venturing out to fight and conquer. And they only enlist Bloodliners. So we’re out of the picture. There’s no reason for us to favour them in particular.”

“In fact, it would be better if we continue to live separately. They’re the army in charge of fighting the hudoqs and keeping us safe, but who knows when they might turn their fangs at us?”

“Exactly. We’ve had many rogue Bloodliners run rampage in towns before and to us, they’re just like a beast. What can we do?”

“Oh but don’t think we’ll just sit here and let them walk all over us! We may not have Bloodline powers, but we’ve got our own ways to stand up.”

“What do you mean?” Fuxiao asked.

“Not all of us agree with it, but there is a group who takes down any rogue Bloodliners.”

“Hey, hey, you shouldn’t be talking about that to travellers. What if they don’t come back here?”

“But that’s something interesting about our town. Unlike others, we’ve got the resistance group The Night Komodos who take down rogue Bloodliners to protect us. That’s something to talk about.”

Komodo. The same name as the person who chased after Yuda in town. The man with the burn marks and crossbow. Fuxiao wondered if that person was part of this resistance group who showed hostility towards Bloodliners. It made sense now why he hunted Yuda.

Topan studied the men talking. Humans who stood up against predators. Just like how he stood up against the hudoqs that destroyed his village. The Bloodrush turned him into a monster so that he could kill monsters. And now these Dormants took up arms against the Bloodliners. It was a vicious cycle of fighting with no end in sight.

After they finished their meal, Fuxiao and Topan went back out to the markets. It’s a surreal feeling, to Topan, because all he knew was fight and survive. 

Fuxiao laced their hands together. “You alright?”

“Yeah…” Topan said hesitantly, “Just… isn’t something I’m used to. Even before I was trapped in the Bloodrush, I was a knight fighting in many wars. Peace was a luxury I never imagined. A town of people living with no reason to hide or fight… it’s a life I never had. In fact, it’s the life I was tasked to protect. It’s the life we wished to have in Lekasi.”

Topan stopped in the middle of the street, eyes darkening.

“But we could never have it with how much Cahayaranga attacked us.”

“We will return to your homeland,” Fuxiao whispered.

“If there is anything left of it.”

“We will go,” Fuxiao squeezed Topan’s hand. “Tomorrow, once you are well rested. We will head off again. Leave this place behind and go back to your home.”

Topan returned the gesture. He leaned down, ignoring that they were in public, and kissed Fuxiao on the lips. “Thank you for saving my life.”

Two lost souls with no memories but hands stained with blood. For the first time since Fuxiao woke up, he didn’t feel the need to run or survive.

“So for today, shall we pretend that we’re normal humans?” Fuxiao tugged at Topan’s hand.

“Hah,” Topan allowed himself to be dragged around, “How could I ever say ‘no’ to you?”