Falling back onto my bed, I kicked up a cloud of dust that smelled distinctly of pizza and old leather. It was after midnight but I had trouble falling asleep. The last 3 hours of my life was playing like a broken record in my memory. And most of the time it stuttered at the scene of Rin dragging his lips back to Stephanie’s ear.

Was this going to be my life? Tagging along as Rin and Stephanie did coupley things? Or better yet, just staying home because he decided to hang out with her instead of me?

I couldn’t even enjoy a friday night at Colby’s house because the lovebirds were PDA-ing all over the place. 

The fact of the matter is, dating Stephanie isn’t just about Rin, it’s about all of us. And I was not signing up to have the rest of my high school years look like this.

Rin seemed happy enough but I know, now more than ever, that those two need to be split up. 

I rolled across the bed with the grace of a lyrical dancer, reaching for my bag that I’d thrown across the floor. The break up plan was a bit crumpled but still intact. I smoothed out the wrinkles to get a better look even though I already had the steps memorized.

According to Rin, Stephanie didn’t have flaws. But I didn’t need to get them from Rin specifically. What if, because of his love disease, Rin couldn’t even see Stephanie’s flaws? What if someone else could?

I tried to remember who Stephanie hung out with when she wasn’t in Rin’s arms. Those girls she brought tonight were probably close friends, right? But there was no way I could get those girls to serve me issues about their friend on a silver platter.

Unless . . .

What if Stephanie would? I was a master manipulator (kind of). Surely, with my expert control over language and emotions, I could get Stephanie to talk about what’s wrong with her relationship. 

Everyone needs counsel, someone to lend an ear in times of stress. If she was worried about her own friends judging Rin too hard, then I, as her boyfriend’s best friend, would be a great person to trust with such information.

An evil smile etched itself onto my face, my first smile in hours. 

—————

“ . . . so I’ll need you to pair up,” Mr Anderson sat back down with a grunt, a numbered set of questions now on the whiteboard beside him. “And you and your partner can answer the questions on the board about the reading.”

There was never a fear of being picked last when Rin and I were in the same class. The rest of the history class riff raff could scramble for a partner while Rin and I peacefully started the dull assignment. We would have done just that if James wasn’t to my left, a pitiful expression on his handsome face.

He looked around the classroom in apprehension. Then, when he processed all the kids sitting in the room, he looked down at his desk, his face dejected–the appearance of giving up. 

Now that simply will not do. Such regal British royalty should never be without a partner.

“You wanna partner up?” I asked after tapping his shoulder.

Before he could tamper down the emotion, James’s eyes lit up. 

“Are you sure? Would Rin be alright with it?”

“Of course he’s alright with it. We’re close but not crazy,” I laughed. My lengthy plan to break up my friend’s barely 2 month-long relationship seemed to contradict that but James didn’t need to know. “Plus he could get another partner in a heartbeat. Look.”

James and I both turned to see Rin calmly discussing the questions with one of the few seniors in the class. It was a known fact that the seniors intimidated every other grade group on campus but Rin looked unaffected around the older girl.

So James finally relaxed, leaning a bit closer.

“Good, because I was hoping we could partner up more often,” he smirked, focus shifting to each of my eyes. “You know, since you’re so good in this class.”

“I appreciate you appreciating my skills,” I joked. The ego stroke was completely appreciated even if unwarranted. It would be nice to get those types of compliments on a regular basis . . . 

“Okay, if this partnership goes well, maybe I’ll consider the proposition.” 

“I’m so glad your liege would consider me,” James chuckled, bowing slightly in his desk.

The two of us laughed so loud, Mr Anderson threatened to break us up. He didn’t follow through with it though. The man was notorious for empty threats and promises. 

Trying to contain my laughter along with James was fun, except for the fact that I kept feeling someone’s eyes on the back of my head. I knew it was Rin. I just didn’t know why he’d be staring. 

We did pair up with different people every once in a while. And Rin wasn’t the jealous type. 

And this wasn’t jealousy. It couldn’t be.

My curiosity got the best of me and before I knew it, I was shifting in my chair, trying to catch Rin’s eyes. But he wasn’t even looking at me. He was the picture of the perfect student, diligently reading without any stray looks my way. 

So it wasn’t jealousy. 

It wasn’t anything. 

Good. 

Now I just had to get my heart to believe that and stop thumping away. 

—————

Sitting next to Stephanie during lunch was the easy part. She welcomed my presence at her left side with a smile, starting up an easy conversation about the gray mush the school called broccoli. 

The harder task was keeping Rin, who sat on her other side, from listening in.

A loud clatter interrupted our conversation. All heads turned to the sound and found Colby saddling up next Rin, eyes alit with energy.

“Elly said you were thinking about watching Haikyuu?”

Rin gaped at the question, glancing at me before turning back to our overexcited friend.

“I guess. There were a couple of edits on Tik-”

“You’re making the right decision, man. I’m telling you this is one of the best shows in the world. There are actually teams of people that-”

And Rin became trapped in Colby’s fanboy bubble. 

A couple months ago, Haikyuu happened to come up when Colby and I were on a call before my shift. He only stopped yapping my ear off after a customer complained about me having my phone out on the job. 

Rin couldn’t know what I planned on asking Stephanie. If he did, it was inevitable what would happen next. He’d be overprotective over her, wanting to shield her from whatever the hell I was doing. Then, he’d notice the trend in my actions over the past week and grill me for the truth. But with Colby’s insane passion for anime, Rin’s ears won’t have the capacity to listen to anything Stephanie and I say.

I smirked seeing the constant movement of Colby’s mouth compared to Rin’s stunned expression. This plan was foolproof. 

“I always thought you guys looked close,” Stephanie said, her eyes also focused on Rin getting overwhelmed by words. “But you’re even closer than I thought. I’m glad Rin has such good friends.”

She made it sound like she was a relieved parent but I managed not to scowl while listening.

“I’m glad he found someone as great as you,” I said in return because that seemed like the right thing to do. Stephanie glowed at the compliment and guilt started some throbbing on the right side of my head.

“And you look so comfortable with each other already.”

The small dig was for my ego and my ego alone.

“Do you guys really not have any problems?” I pushed, smiling as I leaned in. “No disagreements? Issues? Icks?”

Stephanie’s laugh was angelic and after throwing her head back, the shorter sections at the front of her head glided down, framing her face effortlessly. How was this girl even real?

But while I pondered how hair could be so glossy and movie-like, her expression went thoughtful. Holy moly, she was actually thinking about it! Hope swelled in my heart like a clogged toilet and I couldn’t wait for what she’d say next.

“You know, I think we seem really different at first,” she hummed, smiling down at her food. “Rin’s reserved and calm while I’m always running around trying to meet everyone and see everything. I thought about that a lot on our first date, how two people so different could make a relationship work?”

I thought the exact same thing. Think is probably the right word since I’m still wondering.

“But that’s the thing. We have so much in common,” she grinned. “Unlike all those white guys I’d date whose families have been in Canada for generations, Rin understands what it’s like to be different.”

Different. I’d spent most of my life by Rin’s side. In my mind, we always went through things together. We were insecure together, we came into our own together. But I never thought that he might feel different from me.

“Both of our moms have accents that make us want to laugh when they’re lecturing us and sometimes, when we're in a group project or on a team, people underestimate us because somehow our lack of whiteness means we’re less capable.”

I tried to remember Rin telling me any of that and came up with nothing. Either I couldn’t remember, or he never thought to tell me.

“And it’s so nice that I never have to explain that to him. He just gets it,” her voice came down to whisper, the pleased words of someone who’s been completely understood. “In a way, we’re not different at all.”

I was fully gaping at Stephanie by this point. The short girl floated down from her happy place to notice my surprise and smiled in the gentle way a ghibli mother would. 

“So no, there are no icks,” she chuckled. Then, in her most devastating move yet, she wrapped my hands in both of hers, beautiful bright eyes focused solely on me. “I really like your friend, Elly.”

Shakily, I drew my lips up into a smile.

“I’m glad to hear it.”

I already knew what was coming. That afternoon, Rin would tell me for the umpteenth time that he’s going to Steph’s place instead of stopping by my work. On Tuesday, he might spend lunch with her friends to show that he’s committed. And on Friday, Colby will invite all 9 of us back to his place so the couple can enjoy how well their friends get along.

Because today, Stephanie interrupted Colby’s monologue to peck Rin’s cheek. It did nothing to stop the conversation. But it was just enough to remind him that she’s there, ready to support. And he didn’t even smile back, just let his eyes go soft at the sight of her.

Step 2: Use flaws to show Rin why they can’t work:

Failure! They’re perfect for one another!

The bell rang and hand in hand, the couple left the cafeteria. Everyone else went on with their lives but I sat there, watching them go. Rin’s smiling face slipped around the door and my heart clenched tightly. 

Too perfect.