I swept into history class with eye bags the size of craters. Turns out that deciding you were going to ruin your best friend's relationship didn’t help you sleep well at night. 

I kept tossing and turning, confused as to how I’d split them up. And even though I’d spent 60 long minutes on that facetime trying to get Tyler and Colby to agree, I still wasn’t sure if it was the right thing to do.

Maybe I should just let time run its course and watch them split on their own. It sure would ease the guilt.

I was still going back and forth on the decision when I walked up to my favorite desk. It was my most familiar, consistent, beloved chair in the whole classroom and I found it stolen. That ugly, crinkly, glorious chair was stolen by a random stranger.

Frowning, I slipped into the desk to the left of my usual seat. It was further from the fan than I’d like, and now the random stranger was sitting between Rin and I. 

“Good morning,” random stranger smiled, politely stretching a hand out. “My name’s James.”

Scratch that, handsome stranger. Handsome and British. My brain latched onto the accent like an octopus and I struggled to keep my expression normal as I shook his hand.

“I’m Elliot but everyone calls me Elly,” I replied. 

Since we were now in a mutual conversation, I could stare freely. In seconds, I took in his short blond hair, round jaw, and crooked smile. James shifted back, seeming ready to end the conversation there, but I was too curious. It wasn’t every day I met a UK man. 

“You new here?”

“Is it that obvious?” he chuckled.

“Kind of. We’re almost at the end of the semester and I think I would have heard about a British guy in my class.”

That set him off laughing and god, even his laugh was British. It was posh and lively with a deep base that carried across the room. 

“My mom got a promotion she couldn’t pass up so here I am,” he shrugged. Then, his expression grew mischievous, a teasing look appearing. “I just hope North American high schools aren’t as horrible as they seem in the movies.”

“Oh no, they’re way worse,” I laughed. After a moment of adorable confusion where he wasn’t sure if I was telling the truth or not, James laughed along. Maybe it was just me babying the foreign student, but there was something endearing about the new guy. I felt the urge to take him under my wing. 

“But, having friends can help.”

James quirked a brow but I just kept grinning in his face. I would know by the end of this conversation if the two of us would actually make good friends. It all came down to if he could tolerate my brand of humor. 

“Is that an offer?” he asked.

“Yeah, why not?” 

From the way he was smiling, it seemed like British James was ready to accept.

“So exactly where’d you use to live . . . ” 

The words faded out, my brain hung up on the new presence behind James’s head. With his arms crossed and eyes impossibly dark, Rin stared James down.

“You’re in his seat.”

When James flapped his mouth open and closed like a fish, utterly confused, Rin nodded to me. 

“Oh, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize-”

“It’s all good. You can switch now.”

The occasional sound of desks dragging across the floor was the only thing filling the silence. I felt bad that James had to deal with Rin’s random mean streak. I also felt horrible for not noticing when Rin entered the room in the first place. If I did, I could have prevented the awkward meeting. I also might have eased the scowl that’s now become stuck to Rin’s lips.

I tried to introduce them once we switched seats. 

Usually, smiling and laughing while you did something almost forced the people around you to smile along. But James’s smile was tense. And Rin wasn’t smiling at all. After a quick nod of acknowledgement, he essentially ignored James.

If it was any other day, I would have taken Rin outside to figure out what was wrong. But James was new to the school and the country. So I turned to who I hoped would be a new friend. Any thoughts of Rin, his feelings, or his dating life would have to wait.

—————

“What’s wrong, Rin?”

When Rin sighed, he pushed his hair back, the black strands stubbornly falling back into place. The guy was surprisingly good-looking while sad, but I didn’t want him to be sad. 

I thought his listlessness from this morning would pass after an hour or so but for the entire day, he’d moped around like a stubborn chihuahua. He’d probably appreciate being compared to a golden retriever or pitbull more but chihuahua was the only correct answer.

He’d barely said a word during history and when I dragged James along to join us for lunch, anything he did say came with a permanent pout. Not even Stephanie, with her ceaseless positivity and gorgeous smile, could brighten his mood.

“I don’t know,” he shrugged. “I guess I’m just tired.”

The wind picked up, a whistling sound carrying cold air across my feet and past our bodies. We tugged our jackets tighter around us, but it did little to help. Somehow, Rin’s hood smacked over his face and he tripped, stumbling closer to me. 

That’s why, when he turned to look at me, his shoulder brushed against mine. This close, I could tell he was more than tired. 

“Seriously, Rin. What’s wrong?”

He was still bumping into my shoulder with every other step, but Rin had never felt so far away. Knowing that something  is wrong is completely different from knowing what that thing is. 

Then Rin looked into my eyes and for one moment, I wondered if it was about James. Did seeing me close with someone else, someone new, make him this upset?

“Stephanie and I had a little argument,” he finally said, looking at my face but not into my eyes. “It was nothing but I guess I’m still hung up on it.”

The wording of I guess stuck out like the wrong note in a song. And while Rin was brooding like a basketball dad who refused to give up on the Spurs, Stephanie was all smiles and laughs today. It didn’t look like they’d had a fight, but it was the only explanation that made sense.

Rin being jealous of James was a stupid idea.

And really, this is what I already predicted, Rin becoming a shell of himself because of this relationship.

My best friend’s eyes went back to the ground, clouded and conflicted once again. But this time, I knew why. This was like a sign from the heavens. Rin and Stephanie needed to break up. 

And I was the person who was going to make that happen.

—————

Mooove Over Ice Cream Parlor had a crown in its logo as a clear nod to one of the biggest ice cream chains in Canada. Within minutes of starting my training, I found out that the company motto is to always be better than Dairy Queen. 

The store was built based on pettiness. And I absolutely loved that. 

The pettiness was folded into every element of the shop. Like the cute cows stomping out crowns that were printed onto the corners of our napkins. Or the fact that we had a poster of the old Dairy Queen mascot, a smiling ice cream cone, in the staff quarters. Only the happy little cone had red X’s drawn over its eyes and devil horns added to the top of its head. 

Petty people didn’t yell at you for calling out too much within the month. They just passive-aggressively commented on how well rested you looked. And petty people didn’t stop you from working on math homework when shop traffic was slow. They only teased you for struggling to give out change without the help of the cash register calculator.

The fact that Mooove Over was so petty gave me the time to finalize the breakup plan. I was almost at the end of my 3 hour shift but finally, I had it. It wasn’t super impressive, just a list scrawled onto a random sheet of lined paper I pulled from my English folder. 

But I was confident that with this simple, 5-step plan, I could split up any pair of love birds.

Titling my plan Break Up Stephanie and Rin!!! was a bit on the nose but I couldn’t waste time on fancy titles. The steps were the only thing that mattered, anyway.

Step 1: Find out Stephanie’s flaws.

The little I knew about Stephanie Huarez made her seem like a saint. If I was going to convince Rin that a relationship wasn’t a good idea, I’d have to prove that Stephanie wasn’t a good idea.

Step 2: Use flaws to show Rin why they can’t work. 

Once I knew how Stephanie isn’t perfect, then I’d know what arguments to use to prove that they don’t work as a couple.

Step 3: Remind Rin that friends are way better ;)

When Rin is forced to acknowledge how the relationship is harming his life, he might feel lonely. He might be scared to be single. And that’s when I’ll remind him that his friends are way better than any little girlfriend. Then he’ll be confident that single life would be totally awesome.

Step 4: Suggest that they break up

Since I can’t actually break them up myself, I’ll use the momentum to get Rin to do it. All of my arguments would get him thinking about breaking up with her. All I’d need to do is say the actual words and Rin would be chomping at the bit to be single again.

Step 5: Bask in your success!!!

Four turned out to be enough so I added this last one to celebrate. 5 steps are way cooler than four.

A group of niners barged into the shop minutes before closing and I was so tempted to tell them we closed early. But even 7 freshmen who giggled more than they talked while ordering couldn’t dampen my spirits. The break up plan burned a hole into my back pocket, waiting to be used.

I couldn’t wait for my shift to be over. I couldn’t wait for tomorrow to come. Because tomorrow, I’d set my plan into motion.