Part 1: Denial - Episode 11

The door opened loudly, its brass doorknob shimmered brilliantly in the warm light of the cabin. Hesitantly, Lloyd’s gaze slowly progressed upwards; Elias stood in the kitchen doorway, nonchalantly leaning against the doorframe, indignation was painfully present on his expression. “I have a question, Lloyd.” Elias spoke flatly. He took a step closer. “What?” Lloyd replied snarkily. Letting out an audible sigh, Elias straightened his back, “Why can we not kill Thy Bad Habits?” Groaning, Lloyd began, “You know we can’t; we do not know how, it’s actually fucking invincible.”

“There must be a way!” Elias exclaimed desperately, “Everything has to die somehow!” At this, Lloyd murmured, “If God didn’t make it, it cannot die. Thy Bad Habits is not from this world, and I don’t know how the fuck it got here, but it isn’t leaving,” he spat, crossing his arms. Letting out an exasperated grunt, Elias covered his eyes. “We need to kill Thy Bad Habits! We’ll be stuck rotting in this forest for the rest of our lives – I’m going to get out of here . . .”

“I wouldn’t be so hasty,” William began suddenly from behind Elias. “You are being naive,” William sighed, a chill going down Elias’ spine from the biting cold suddenly creeping through the cabin. “You’re aware of how dangerous it is to travel to Hope’s cabin as often as you do. Which,” William paused, eyeing Lloyd angrily, “is a lot more often than you ever sent me out. Or Abel, for that matter.”

There it was again. Abel. Elias shook his head, plunging uncontrollably into suffocating thought as if it were a thick, deep, dark ocean. Yet as the light seemed to dissipate; a voice vibrated harshly throughout the water. “Hypothetically,” William began, “If you were able to kill Thy Bad Habits . . . How would you do it?” Thinking for a moment, Elias’ mouth opened slightly – though left ajar as his thoughts lingered. “I think I’d try to blind it. Permanently. And deafen it,” Elias breathed almost inaudibly. “Make it feel so much pain, to the point where it is completely unable to feel anything apart from agony. Make your escape to The City District.” 

Taken aback, surprised by Elias’ response, Lloyd exhaled. “That would be hard.”

“Does it look like I give a shit?!” Elias choked, a harsh tone of tragic despair shifted in his head. “That thing kept me from going back. I don’t want to be here! I want to go home!”

“Elias, think rationally. You’re an adult, you need to deal with this.” As the cold words slipped quietly from Lloyd’s lips, Elias flinched. “I want to go home.”

“Elias, I built this cabin from nothing. It was two fucking concrete steps and half of a floor. Look at it now, electricity, lights, beds . . . Be grateful. This place is better than the city could ever be. That place was cold and lonely.” Shifting his feet; taking a step closer to Elias, Lloyd continued, his voice got increasingly more aggressive. “The City District had a side to it that will make you realise that place is not adequate for human life.” Looking up at Elias, Lloyd took yet another step, his jaw open, ready to lecture him. “You need to get used to this. You’re here now, Elias,” Lloyd’s voice grew slightly tender – sympathy almost echoed quietly in his voice. “So what if I’m here now?” Elias croaked. “I’m scared, Lloyd. This place scares me. I didn’t know what I was getting into-”

“Yeah? None of us did, Elias! We all came here expecting a jovial little camping trip.”

A tear – alone – trickled slowly down Elias’ cheek, leaving a small droplet on his hoodie. Angered, in one go, Elias pushed Lloyd. Hitting the wall, Lloyd grunted silently, his left eye twitched with riled up rage. “Grow up!” He yelled, reaching his hand to Elias. Taking a step back, Elias’ jaw shivered; his voice wavered as he squeaked, “Lloyd, you don’t understand!” Feeling a brief shuffle from behind him, Elias turned, as he did, William pushed through gently. “Lloyd, lay off him. It isn’t his fault.”

“William, you don’t have to-” Elias began sympathetically, reaching out to him hesitantly, though withdrawing his hand.

. . .

The dust had settled outside; the small, golden orbs of light were pure, for they too had settled, shifting among themselves excitedly as Elias walked past tiredly, climbing into bed, the ladder creaking as it always did. “Thank you for standing up for me,” Elias whispered. From below, William audibly closed the book, placing it onto the wooden nightstand beside his bed. “Neither of you should have said those things, but he didn’t understand.” Sheepishly smiling; a nervous laugh escaped Elias’ lips. “I just miss home . . .” Elias began. Half-listening, William hummed a single note as a cold sign of his attention. “I don’t know why I ran away. It was to find my cousin, I was so intent on finding him . . . I’d assumed he’d come here. Everyone says he died.”

“Did he?”

“I’m not sure. I hope he’s alive. He wouldn’t just die on me,” he sighed, sniffling slightly, coughing once. 

“I was thinking,” Elias began heartily, though his tone faded quickly, “What would I even do if I got out?” He paused.

“What do you mean?” William asked, flatly.

“I didn’t tell anyone where I was going. I left most of my stuff back home… I don’t know how we’d get back to the city.”

“We?”

“....” Elias paused. “You wouldn’t come with me if I left?” At this, William sighed.

“I guess that was a silly assumption,” Elias chuckled shamefully.

“I might never go back, then.” 

. . .

“That’s so dumb.” Lloyd spat. “Why would you assume William’s coming with you? We’re not all in the same boat.”

“I can’t do it alone!?” Elias whined. Lloyd clenched his fist and put it firmly on the table. “I’m tired of hearing about all of this ‘getting out’ shit! You can’t! You came here! I’m actually surprised you made it here with how naive and dumb you’re being!”

“Just because I’m ten years younger than you doesn’t mean I’m an idiot.”

“I’ve met plenty of stupid people over the age of 60, Elias.”

“Whatever! We’re,” Elias said, gesturing to himself, Lloyd, and William in the next room, “---Not all in the same boat! You wanna rot here, and I wanna get out!” Having the same thing used against him, Lloyd rolled his eyes and clicked his tongue. “You’re getting absolutely nowhere.”