Bad Elf's eyes darken in rage and lust. He looks like he could be turned on and homicidal just now, and Bad Cop is wearing a devious smirk across his face—he knows he won.

I started mumbling against the gag, trying to indicate my desire to speak. Maybe I can role-play my way out of this, change the mood?

Bad Cop "Bradley" sat up, and I didn't miss the unnatural way his body moved as he did so. He hadn't used his hands or anything, it's like his body just...moved but not by the power of muscle contracting or nerves firing. A shiver runs down my spine as he leans over me to pull the gag from my mouth, icy fingers brush my face while he unties it.

"The human female screams like a banshee," bad elf grumbles, pulling on a pair of shorts. "It made my ears hurt."

"I'm sure she'll stay quiet out of respect for your stupid elf ears," bad cop snips sarcastically, black pools centered on my face.

I coughed a bit, swallowing spit that had pooled in my mouth, and wished I could wipe my face off some. Both my captors watch me expectantly, Bad Elf leaning casually against the wall. Bad Cop says nothing, eyes still fixed on me, and I've taken note of the fact he's not blinked once.

Very convincing.

I forced an awkward smile.

"Uh...so you guys into D&D too?" I mumble uncomfortably, not sure whether to laugh, cry, or scream at my predicament. Not sure what I'm even trying to do with my statement.
Bad Elf tilts his head in question at Bad Cop, raising a perfect silver eyebrow. Bad Cop cracks his neck, providing a brief explanation, "human game about magic and fantasy, heavy in role-play. Uses dice. You imagine and build your own character on paper, fight, and your success or failure is determined by your dice roll. Pretty fun to be honest."

I swallowed hard in anxiety, eyes darting between them. Bad Elf furrows his brow and narrows his eyes, "she is about to be eaten, for what purpose does she ask this? I hoped there would be some pleading, begging...bargaining, suffering!"

Oh my god.

"W-well, uhm, I like cosplaying too! You look very convincing, may I add, your ears especially! Hard not to notice the effort put into it. You know, I cosplayed Eowyn at Sakura-con last year. Why don't you untie me and I'll show you my cosplay." spit out stupidly, not sure where I'm going with this, why I'm even trying. Bad elf can't be serious! I don't want to be eaten! Please let this be fucked up role-play, please! Can we all just bond over cosplay and they let me go?

Bad Elf's eyes widened in curiosity, amusement on his face. "Fascinating, she knows of The History too, with desire to discuss it even in the face of death. How curious."

The "history"? In the face of death? Is he talking about Lord of the Rings..? My mind is racing, I have to find a way to buy more time. I've got to play along. But before I can think of what else to say, bad cop interjects.

He clears his throat at me, and I watch him make a subtle "cut it out" gesture with his hand. "Yep, they all know," he says flatly, changing the subject immediately. "Now to business, where do you live?" He asks, unblinking black orbs trained on my face.

Thank sky daddy, is he going to let me leave now?

"...I'm uh, your neighbor, next door? Moved in a few weeks ago..." I mumble hesitantly, not sure whether this is a good or bad sign, but hoping it's the former. Bad Cop shoots a disapproving glare at Bad Elf snapping, "we don't shit where we eat, remember?" he then glances back at me exhaling tiredly, fidgeting with his radio a bit. "So, I regret to inform you that I'll be having you for breakfast. However, I'll do my best to have you back in the comfort of your own bed in about a hour or so. You'll wake with no memory of these events.." His voice is even, no readable expression apparent.

This cannot be happening.

"Eat me? You're real funny; but going home does sound nice. Promise I'll say nothing." I laugh awkwardly, glancing between the two hopelessly, anxiety reaching critical mass. Bad Elf is wearing a twisted look of excitement, Bad Cop looks...legitimately hungry, and at the end of his rope with exasperation.
"I do apologize for my shitty roommate, he shouldn't have taken you in the first place. But you are here now, and quite frankly I'm starving. Hard to turn down an easy meal." Bad Cop shrugs, his tone dry and matter-of-fact.

"...a-are you serious?" I stutter, dread filling my gut, searching his handsome face for any sign of sarcasm.

"Dead serious," Bad Elf croons smugly.
I give Bad Cop a pleading look, only to see some amusement sprinkle across his face, eyes now on Bad Elf, and it's almost as if he's pleased with him. "Pun intended?" He questions, smirk at the corner of his lips.

"Indeed, vampire." Bad Elf flashes a white, toothy grin, wholly impressed with himself. Bad Cop actually laughs, "Hah! So you are catching on."

What the fuck is happening? My head is spinning looking at both incredulously. "This isn't funny," I start to cry. Bad Elf cocks his head at me, as Bad Cop's snickering fades.

"Get it, female? Because he's dead!" The dark one laughs cruelly, twirling a loose silky strand around his long finger. My heart drops, panic consuming me all over again. They're literally insane! Vampire? Elf? Nope, nope, nope.

"S-so order take out, you cannibalistic freak!" I blurt out in horror, watching Bad Elf's face twist into a wicked grin at my distress. "And you, y-you douchey purple bottom, you're not funny either!" I snap, glaring at him.

"Oh but you are the take-out, human. Can't you see? It's very funny." He sneers, voice dark and mocking. It's then I feel the dense, cold weight of bad cop settling over me. I feel paralyzed, mind unable to process what's happening. Muscular, pale forearms set on either side of my head.

This isn't happening, it can't be.

"It's just so much fun when it's not me!" Bad Elf croons gleefully with a clap of his slender hands, stalking over to the bed to get a better view.
"Say, Bradley...what is a 'bottom'?" he adds in curiosity, red eyes studying me.

Bad Cop chuckles, "essentially Nal, you've got serious bottom energy despite the show you put on, and she picked up on it. I'm the one that fuck's you—not the other way around, and she knows it." He says lightly, enjoying the effect his words seem to have on Bad Elf.

Bad Elf hisses, narrowing his eyes at Bad Cop, huffing out, "I allow you fuck me. There's a difference, and I will not be swallowing tonight." He tilts his head in defiance, smug expression on his face. Bad cop shakes his head, a knowing look on his face as he leans down to whisper in my ear; "Don't let him fool you, he can be a total pillow princess."

I watch Bad Elf's red orbs burn in irritation, as if he actually heard what Bad Cop whispered to me. In fact, I'm sure he did. Because it's now that I know for sure this is real, and I'm not getting out.

"Now, you'll be a good girl for me and stay silent," Bad Cop murmurs darkly. Black pools drawing me in, serene look on his face, as he runs a cool finger tip over my lips. It's like my body and mind are forced to comply, no matter the inner protest nor adrenaline response surging through me. It's then that a deathly cold hand grips me by the throat. He dips his head down soft, cold lips running over my neck causing me to shudder. My limbs are aching from the discomfort of my position in these bindings, and I want to scream but can't. What I'd akin to a hungry growl comes from deep within the vampire's throat, and a white-hot, searing pain hits me as he sinks his fangs into my neck. My body goes limp, vision starting to blur as my life force dissipates with each fleeting moment.

I'm going to die here.