He wakes up with a gasp, drenched in cold sweat. He sits up and blinks rapidly, vision blurry; when his vision refocuses, he glances around his room—except…it isn’t his room. It’s someone else’s. Certainly not his grandparents’ since he knows that room way too well. Confused, he swings his legs to the side of the bed, readying to get out but pauses when he’s overcome with nausea. He doesn’t remember what happened—no, that’s a lie. He knows exactly what happened, but doesn’t know how he came here. He was about to

[kill]

say goodbye to his life but something—someone—stopped him. Who? Why? When? How? Juni’s frustrated that someone had just got to interfere with his life. He was so close but clearly the universe wasn’t done fucking with him yet. No, the universe wanted him to suffer some more, to remind him that he was still alive but no one in his family was.

Sure, his maternal grandparents were alive, but he’s pretty sure his grandmother had a stroke or two already, causing her to wind up in the hospital, and his grandfather was a crackhead and alcoholic—to which he would smoke and drink simultaneously. They were old—practically dead on their feet. If they went out, Juni would truly be alone. He had no cousins, as both his parents were an only child, and as were their parents. So what was the purpose of him living life when his entire family was dead?

Exhaling sharply, he lifts himself off the bed, wincing as he does so, and strides to the door. As he opens it, he finds himself almost nose to nose with another man causing him to cry out in alarm, staggering backwards.

Ohmigosh, I’m so sorry! The man blurts out, looking panicked. Brows knitted, he asks, Are you okay? I’m sorry if I frightened you.

Who are you? Where am I? Did you save me? If you did, fuck you. Juni growls, now glaring at the man before him.

The man has a baffled look on his face. Did you…screw me? Wh-why? I just saved you. Sir—

It was the middle of the night at a beach. How the fuck did you spot me? Why were you at the beach in the first place? Who are you, playing hero like that? I didn’t want to be saved—didn’t need saving. Juni spits. He’s infuriated that this stranger has saved him. He doesn’t even know him, so why would he do as something as stupid as saving a

[suicidal]

hopeless person? It didn’t make any sense. None of it made sense.

I go to the beach at night often. Plus, my dog likes it. The man says.

Juni stares at him. Are you high? He asks him.

The man looks troubled, a weak laugh escaping his lips. No? I-I mean, sure, it sounds absurd, but…I’m not…high.

He doesn’t believe him. How can he? There’s no way someone at that precise moment could have been there when he tried to—it didn’t make sense. Why did that happen? Didn’t he suffer enough? Must he continue suffering?

Sir—The man starts, but Juni holds his hand up, silencing him.

Prove it. Juni says.

Prove…what? The man asks.

That you’d got a dog. Otherwise I’ll think you’re insane going to a beach at night. Juni says.

There’s a moment of pause before the man shrugs. Okay. He says. He then calls over his shoulder, Koda! Come here, girl! He looks at Juni who stares at him blankly.

It isn’t long before Juni hears the sound of something running upstairs and into him. He knocks to his ass, startled to find a large white dog putting her paws on his legs, panting, green eyes shimmering.

Koda! The man cries out, shocked. Gosh, she never does that! Koda, girlie! Hey! Get off! He grabs Koda’s dark red collar and pulls her off Juni. The man looks flustered. I’m so sorry. Ugh, this is embarrassing. I promise you, she’s a good dog. She’s not aggressive or anything. She’s just…He trails off, unsure what to say.

Juni looks at the dog—a Great Pyrenees, she appears to be—and he places his hand on top of her head. She looks at him with her green eyes, something intelligent and almost wise behind those eyes of hers, and she gives him a doggy smile.

I’ve always wanted a dog, Juni mumbles, stroking Koda’s ear.

They can be handfuls at times, the man says, now sitting down across from Juni. But sometimes you get lucky and they’re sweethearts and so, so smart like this girl here. He kisses the side of Koda’s face. He sighs then he goes stiff. Ah. Geez, what’s up with me today? I’m Aiki. Aiki Jeo. He sticks his hand out in front of Juni.

Juni stares at Aiki’s hand.

No? Aiki says, giving off a weak laugh. He tucks his hand into his pocket. He draws in a deep breath and says, Look. I don’t know what you’ve gone through or are going through. But I don’t think you should give up on your life. Even though you think you’ve hit the lowest of lows, I promise you, there is a way up.

I’ve got a shovel, Juni mutters, scowling at the ground.

You’ve got a shov—well, if you keep on digging, eventually you’ll dig right out of Earth and find yourself in space. Aiki says.

Juni looks sharply at Aiki. He notices that the other man has amber eyes—and they’re glowing. Aiki has a small, hesitant smile, and Juni realizes that, despite this situation, he’s trying to make light of it, make a joke, tease Juni around. Juni doesn't know what to feel.

You’re a kid, Juni says. You wouldn’t get what I’ve gone through—adult stuff.

Aiki tilts his head side to side and says, Hm, not necessarily. I’m not a kid. I can legally drink.

Juni feels like the other man keeps on surprising him. What? He says.

Aiki shrugs, giving a short nod. I’m twenty-one. He says. Uhh…recently turned.

How recent? Juni asks.

Uhh…a week ago? Aiki says. He suddenly grins bright when he notices Juni’s baffled expression. I look younger than I am, huh? Yeah, people still think I’m like sixteen or seventeen but I’m not. Must be the genes. He stands up and offers a hand to Juni but he refuses, standing on his own. Aiki seems to be hesitating for some reason since he keeps on biting his lower lip. When questioning him about what he wanted to say, Aiki says, I…don’t want to be weird or pushy or anything but…um. I get that you’re…hurting…but…is it…okay, say, if we get coffee or something? I can…we can talk. You can talk. I don’t…I’m sorry, this is weird. And awkward, so very awkward. But…I can lend you an ear. I don’t have a lot of friends, and I promise I won’t tell anyone whatever you say. Now, I get you must be wondering how you could trust me, just a college kid, a stranger, but…w-who knows? Maybe there’s a reason why our paths crossed as…cliché as that sounds.

Normally Juni would refuse company. He hated talking to people, especially when it came down to personal topics. But then again, they were strangers. What care did this man have for what Juni could say? It wouldn’t impact him, maybe subconsciously, but not entirely.

Fine, Juni says. When?

Aiki’s amber eyes light up and he looks…thrilled? Juni doesn’t get how someone can have so much happiness bubbling inside of them.

Then again, it’s been years since Juni has felt happy.

Okay, uh, can I have your number? I’ll tell you when I’m available ‘cause I got school. Aiki says.

Juni subconsciously reaches into his pockets only to find himself phoneless. Huh. He says. I think it’s still in my car. Yet the car’s at the beach—

I actually got it towed here, Aiki says.

Clearly this man was full of surprises.

Juni gives a slow nod and says, Lemme go to it…?

Aiki leads him downstairs and outside where indeed his car was parked there. Juni rushes to his car and opens it, finding his keys in the cup holder and his phone on the dashboard. He grabs his phone and checks it. He has ten missed calls from his grandmother and fifty-six texts from her as well. He has two missed calls from his boss—no, ex-boss Mr. Tzan—and a text from him reading, Are you okay? All this was from two days ago. So how long was he out?

Hey, man, you good? Aiki says from behind him.

Juni withdraws from his car, dazed. How long have I been out? He asks him.

Aiki blinks. Um. Today’s a Saturday…I found you Wednesday. Um, so Thursday, Friday— Three days. Uh—I-I promise I didn’t do anything to you. I just…kinda let you sleep. When you woke up several times, you were completely out of it but I still provided you with water and food.

Three…whole…days? Juni says, stunned. He has no recollection of waking up before today. Just how out of it was he? He feels shaky, a panic rising in his throat. Somehow losing remembrance of what happened over the past three days is scarier than actually trying to drown himself.

He must have been shaking violently because Aiki asks in an alarmed voice, Hey, are you cold? He approaches Juni then stops short, now almost toe to toe with him. Aiki crosses his arms over his chest and says, Why don’t you come inside for a moment before you go. Just…stay until you’re okay. You’re not going to bother me. Promise.

Juni tries to slow his breathing but finds it quickening instead. He hasn’t had a panic attack in a long time—he used to have it often when he was younger, but was forced to overcome it when his younger sister suddenly came into the picture. His head is spinning and his hands are clammy. He finds his world tilting and he grabs onto the car’s door handle to steady himself from tipping over.

Aiki responds. He immediately grabs Juni’s wrist and pulls him into a hug, murmuring in his ear, It’s fine, it’s fine, it’s okay, I’m here, I’m right here. Shh…breathe. In…and out. In…and out. It’s okay. I’m right here. I promise I can help you. It doesn’t matter that we’re strangers— there’s got to be a reason why our paths crossed. I believe that—you gotta believe that, too. Even though it’s childish, even though it’s cliché, even though it sounds so stupid, I promise you, everything happens for a reason. There’s no such thing as coincidences. Aiki pulls back, looking at Juni with his amber eyes.

like liquid gold—Juni realizes. His eyes looked like liquid gold. Juni draws in a shuddering breath, shocked that he’s crying. He’s a mess. He’s embarrassed that he’s crying and shaking and so out of it. His breathing has slowed down at least.

Aiki gives Juni a reassuring smile. Hey. That’s better. He pats Juni’s shoulder. That was a nasty shock you had. His smile is now crooked and amused. He says, Well, darn. I don’t know your name.

Juni realizes that he hasn’t told Aiki his name whereas Aiki told his. Juni chews the inside of his cheek before holding his hand out in front of him. I’m Juni Sato. He says. Twenty-three.

Aiki grins. Aiki Jeo. College student, majoring in criminology. Twenty-one looking sixteen. He shakes Juni’s hand. Nice to meet you, Mr. Sato.

Perhaps it’s Aiki’s affectionate, infectious smile, but whatever it is, Juni smiles.

The last time he’d smiled was the day before his sister died.

It’s been six years since he’s felt hopeful. Since he’s felt…at ease.

Maybe Aiki’s right: there is a reason why their paths have crossed.

Now here, in front of a man with eyes of amber and a golden smile, Juni feels all right.