I woke up to Viktor shaking me. I grunted at him, and he stopped. 

“Sorry, you were thrashing around in your sleep and I was worried you might hurt yourself,” he said softly and relaxed back into the bed beside me. 

“Sorry, I’ll move to the other—-”

“No. Stay here, where I can wake you if you have another nightmare,” he said, cutting me off and wrapping his arms around me so I couldn’t leave the bed. 

“Fine. But it’s your sleep that will suffer.” I muttered before closing my eyes again and relaxing. Viktor was warm, pressed against me, and it was easy to fall asleep again. But all good things must come to an end, and I woke up to him shaking me again. 

“You don’t have to leave, so don’t bother. I only woke you this time because you were panting and you looked to be distressed.”

I groaned, and focused on staying awake, until he went back to sleep. I felt terrible that I kept waking him up when he was sleeping. He was the one with the job and family to run. He couldn’t give up restful sleeping for me. It just wasn’t fair to him to have to. Rolling over, I watched him while he slept. I felt guilty for keeping him awake and for making his life more difficult. I wished I had the complete courage to tell him the truth about how I was feeling, but I couldn’t bring myself to do it. 

Slipping out of the bed, I turned and looked at Viktor again, making sure he was still asleep before leaving the bedroom. It felt strange to wander these halls now, in the dark. I crept down the stairs and into the kitchen. I knew that if I wanted a bit of sleep tonight that there had to be some kind of alcohol in the kitchen to help with that.

Digging through the cupboards, I finally found the alcohol stash and was looking at them all. I pulled out a few bottles and set them on the counter, not really sure what one was going to be the best for this. It had been a fairly long time since I had last done something like this.

“Pick this one. It helps me sleep when I can’t,” Viktor said, and pointed to a bottle before pulling it closer. I nodded and grabbed the bottle.

“Thanks, Viktor——-” I stopped and spun around, bottle in my hand, and Viktor was still in the clothing he wore to bed. What the hell was he doing awake?

He moved away from me, grabbing a glass and setting it down on the counter. “Want to tell me why you’re not in bed?”

“No?” I said questionably, and inched closer to the counter, where the glass sat. I opened the bottle and paused. “I couldn’t sleep. Not without waking you up repeatedly, and that’s not fair to you.” Pouring myself half a glass, I screwed the lid back on and Viktor took it back to the cupboard and put it away.

“This is the only time I’ll allow you to treat your problem this way, Nikita. I have to schedule a meeting with Alessio shortly, and you’re coming. We are going to deal with this before it gets any worse.”

“Did I ask for your help?” I snapped, feeling attacked.

“You don’t have to ask for my help, and I don’t care if you want it or not. Be glad I’m not taking you all over the countryside looking for a doctor or a handful of doctors to help you.”

“I’m fine.” I muttered, before tossing back the drink and screwing my face up as it burned the entire way down. Viktor took the glass and put it in the sink.

“Come on, we are going back to bed.”

“Viktor I’ll just——-”

“Nikita. I’m not giving you an option here. Please don’t make me have to use force to take you back to our room.”

Letting out a deep sigh, I started off towards the bedroom, Viktor on my ass the entire way. He closed the door behind us and waited for me to get into the bed, before he did. He turned off the light with his phone and I felt him staring at me in the dark.

“What?” I muttered.

“I wish you wouldn’t use alcohol as a coping mechanism. That’s how it becomes dangerous.”

“What else would you have me do? There are far worse things, Viktor.”

“I told you to use me, Nikita.”

I snorted, thinking that this was another pass of his on me, but quickly I realized he was being serious. I sat up and looked at him in the dark. I really couldn’t see that much, but I knew he had to be making some stupidly serious face.

“You cannot actually have said that right now and meant it seriously.”

“What if I did?” he replied, and I sighed. “You can’t ask me to do something like that.”

“We are married. I would like it if you needed me, Nikita.” He muttered, before turning in the bed, and I knew he was going back to sleep and ending that conversation there. I laid back down and rolled away from him, turning the pillow sideways. I wrapped my arms around it and laid my head down. I could feel his heat against my back as he rolled over again and scooted closer to me, his arm slipping around my waist under the blanket. Closing my eyes, I let myself drift off to sleep as the comfort of the alcohol slipped in. Hopefully, I would be able to sleep now, peacefully, and relaxed. 

Later on, I felt the bed move and my warmth leave as the blanket was lifted and settled back down. I reached out for Viktor, and he whispered. “Go back to sleep, Nikita. I just need to use the restroom.”

“Hurry.” I mumbled and rolled onto my back, waiting for him to come back. When he finally did, he climbed back into the bed. I gave him a moment to get settled before I crawled back over for his warmth. He wrapped his arm around me and pulled me even closer. I rested my head on his chest, feeling the beat of his heart and the warmth of his body. I let myself drift off to sleep again, feeling safe and secure in his arms. The sound of my phone ringing woke me up sometime later, and Viktor was quick to answer it. 

“Lev, he’s sleeping.”

I listened to Viktor talking, his chest vibrating with his speech. He seemed content with me pressed against him. The sun was up, and I could feel the warmth on my back, and he was still here in bed with me. 

“I’ll have him call you when he is awake.” I heard him set my phone back down, and he sighed. “I don’t want to have to wake you up just yet, Nikita. For once, you look comfortable and at peace.” 

His fingers brushed my cheek, and I accidentally let a smile break out because his fingertips were tickling my skin. “Mmm, how long have you been awake?”

“Minute or so.” I muttered, turning my face into his chest. His fingers slipped into my hair, and it felt nice. “Don’t stop.”

“Lev wants you to call him once you’re fully awake. He said your sister is on her way for a visit and she demanded that we, as in you and your husband, make ourselves known.”

“I’ll think about it.” 

“Nikita, look at me,” Viktor asked, and I looked up and he pulled me closer to him. He pressed his lips to my forehead, and I frowned. 

“If you’re going to make moves on me this early, Viktor, at least make them count.”

“Would you have preferred I kiss your lips?” He asked, and I actually had to pause and think about it. Would I have actually preferred his lips against mine? Using his upper body to lift myself up a little more, I pressed my lips to his, and he remained still. Not even kissing me back. 

“Kiss me back. If you want me to kiss you again, Viktor.” I sighed. 

 He kissed me back, and I could feel my heart pounding in my chest. His hands moved down to my waist, and he pulled me closer. I melted into his arms, and I could feel myself getting lost in the moment. I reached for his cock, which was actually hard underneath me, but he stopped me. “Please don’t. I have shitty self control when you’re involved, and I don’t want to do anything to upset this. Since you’re willingly touching me right now.”

I felt slightly embarrassed that Viktor stopped me. I knew how badly he wanted to touch me, so this was an entirely new level of odd from him. It was like he was actually being respectful of how I might feel, and for Viktor, that was actually a new thing. He didn’t do that. 

“I was trying to keep this going.” 

“You don’t have to keep anything going, Nikita. A kiss was enough.” 

“You’ve never turned me down for sex before, Viktor.” 

“Things are different now, Nikita.” He muttered. 

I rolled my hips against his erection and sighed. He grabbed my hips and lowered his voice as he spoke. “I thought you would not use me this way?”

“You’re the one who wanted me to need you, Viktor. Though right now, it seems you need me, or at least your cock does.” 

He picked me up, untangling us both, and setting me beside him. He got out of the bed and leant over. “Call your brother back, Amore. I have work to do. I’ll see you for lunch.”

He got dressed, and left the bedroom, and I let out a groan. He totally ignored my sexual advances towards him. For once I wanted to actually touch him, and he just brushed me away because he didn’t want to ruin this? What the hell… That was not the Viktor that kept me locked up in a room. I didn’t know this mellowed down, slightly tamed Viktor.