Why Are You Sorry, Darling?

Chapter 4

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A few days later, a special guest came to DeLov Manor: Mendrea Ru Amanta, the woman generally referred to as Countess Amanta. The unusual thing about her was that the “Amanta” wasn’t her husband’s name, but her father’s.

“It’s an honor to meet you, Your Grace.”

“I’m pleased to meet you, Countess.”

The kind-faced countess bowed politely. The gold pin in her elegantly twisted bun splendidly matched her brown hair.

“You must have been surprised by the sudden invitation. I know it sounds shameless, but please make yourself at home.”

“Please don’t say that. I’m honored.”

I took her to the tearoom. The tearoom in the greenhouse was the pride of DeLov Manor, and it was one of the thousands of good things about the place. In other words, it was perfect to capture the heart of Countess Amanta, who was in her mid-thirties.

To gain someone’s trust, you needed to invest either a lot of time or a lot of effort. But it was sometimes possible in the right circumstances to soften someone’s heart for just a little bit to get them to open up. All that was required was warm afternoon sunshine, an elegant and unique tea set, and a good conversation partner who subtly made you feel good about yourself. Lastly, if there was a dessert delicious enough to melt a person’s heart, they’d share stories that they would usually never reveal… Just like this.

“Oh, then you and your previous husband...?”

“Yes. We have completely split up.” The countess shook her head as she waved her fan. I could relate. A jaded expression that even her refined manners couldn’t hide flashed across her face. "And for a shameful reason too.” She put a piece of the freshly made wheat cake in her mouth, her expression softening with joy.

"You don’t have to tell me if it’s uncomfortable.”

“No, it’s fine. I’m sure you’ve heard it through the grapevine already.”

Countess Amanta used her father’s surname. In the empire, this indicated that she was a divorcée. And on top of that, she’d even had her right of succession restored after the divorce. Cases like hers were rare, but did exist.

“Goodness... Although I’m about to tell you now, it’s not an easy thing to bring up. My word. It’s vulgar, but I’ll be honest. We got divorced due to sexual dysfunction. Oh, heavens.”

I gasped, “Oh my!” and then covered my mouth, but my ears perked up. “You asked the empress personally for a favor, and she responded, is that right?”

“Yes. That’s correct. I couldn’t take it any longer. As you know, the imperial family handles the jurisdiction of marriage between aristocrats.”

“Then that was the reason for your divorce?”

“Yes. It was actually accepted.”

As soon as the delicious dessert softened her heart, she’d let her guard down and disclosed information more generously. Basically, she started oversharing. The things she revealed were very helpful.

“Everyone mocked me, but it was possible to get a divorce because of it. Though of course, I did have to prove it.” She chuckled.

Perhaps it was because she was in such high spirits that she started to divulge unnecessary information, even including things I didn’t want to know.

She held up a small cracker and said, “My ex-husband’s pecker would shrink to this size in bed.” She laughed again. “It’s ridiculous.”

At the end of our tea party, the countess’s expression shifted to show signs of worry over all she’d spilled, but her mood improved in an instant at my reply.

“I had a lovely time today, my lady.”

“No, Countess, the pleasure was all mine.”

From her point of view, it didn’t matter what she’d told me. She was pleased as long as I, who was of higher rank than her, was in a good mood.

"If you don’t mind, could I invite you again another time?"

“Yes, of course.”

The countess brightened even more at my words. People in my position didn’t usually speak in vain, so she was likely to come back again. And of course I had to invite her back after she’d given me such precious information.

“Thank you, Your Grace!”

With that, Countess Amanta of the entertaining conversation and useful information took her leave. I was exhausted, perhaps because I had humored her as a listener for what felt like quite a long time, but I couldn’t rest.

I headed for the office. Fortunately, I’d given orders to the servants before seeing off the countess to set out parchment and pen, so they were already arranged on the desk. Now that I’d received this information, all I needed to do was use it wisely. Moistening the ink on the pen, I pondered our conversation. “I knew it. The key is the imperial family.” I sat down and organized a few things, drawing lines until the pen wrote smoothly. Then I got to work.

What did I need? A divorce. In order to do that, I was pushing Seira and my husband together, but it would take a long time for those two to cause an unforgivable incident. Frankly, it could take ages to engineer a situation where the blame for divorce rested on my husband, but I couldn’t just sit here and do nothing about it. So, I’d decided to speed things up a little bit.

With firm determination, I picked up my pen and began to write in plain handwriting.

—This unfortunate woman humbly writes to His Honorable Imperial Majesty.

Nice. That should catch his interest.

—...My young maiden’s heart fell deeply in love with my husband, and I strove always to be a good wife. I kept myself well-groomed and attended faithfully to my marital duties, but I never once was able to spend the night with my husband. And I do not believe I ever will. Your Majesty...

I was tattling to the emperor. Of course, the played-out story of the wife heartbroken over her husband’s affair would be useless, so common as to be boring. What good would that do me, when even the emperor had courtesans of his own? So I took a different approach.

—In terms of appearance, the duke I married is the most graceful and handsome man after Your Majesty and His Highness the Crown Prince. Any woman in the empire would covet him. His body is flawless and perfect... and no different from the other men of the empire in most aspects... But as shameful as it is to admit, when it comes to matters of the bedroom, though his form is upright and of considerable bulk... It must be known that he mimics a beast that trembles in place, too weak to leap to attention.

Your Majesty... The truth is, my husband is impotent.

—For a married couple, is not the love exchanged under the moonlight just as important as that in the sunlight? At night I lie awake tossing and turning, feeling hollow in my heart. When I see His Grace’s back turned on me, I constantly sigh, and my mind and body are restless. The reason my heart is so empty is that there is something else of mine that will never be filled. My biggest wish is to make love to my husband... Yet that has proven impossible.

In other words: my husband can’t get it up, so let me out of here.

—Finally, I believe that a beautiful commoner would be more suitable for my husband Duke DeLov than myself, a woman lacking in so many ways. I beg you tearfully...

I’m returning this cheating bastard. Give me a divorce so that he can be happy with his mistress!

—There is no one else I can ask for help, so I turn in desperation to Your Majesty. A loveless marriage has no meaning, and it would be impossible for us to have a child. This miserable woman hopes that His Majesty, who has the eyes of a hawk and the heart of a dragon, will come to a wise conclusion. And so...

You’ll make the wise choice, right? You think this is funny too, don’t you? I thought, adding the final period. “Whew, I’m done.”

I threw down the pen that I had been pressing to the paper, dipped my fingers in my teacup, and dropped a couple of drops of liquid on the parchment. Round stains that looked like tears appeared on my letter. I looked it over while waiting for the drops to dry, and once the parchment was ready, I rolled it up. I had written it myself, but I had to admit that it was a very provocative divorce petition. But it was no big deal. In fact, some wives of nobles did write petitions like this, although it was uncommon.

Besides, what I wanted wasn’t a divorce that would happen just because of this one petition. After all, it was related to House DeLov, so the imperial family wouldn’t be so quick to agree to our separation. Simply put, this petition alone wasn’t going to get our divorce approved. In the end, it was just a piece of parchment with no power. But did that mean it was meaningless? Absolutely not. It’d catch the emperor’s interest at the very least. He’d wonder what was wrong with the impeccable and magnificent Duke DeLov.

In my previous life—that was, before I woke up as the duchess, there was a concept known as the “human wave attack.” You couldn’t go wrong when you attacked with an overwhelming number of people. I planned to make allies. To be precise, I’d create an audience who were in favor of a perfect divorce that helped me exit the marriage unscathed, leaving the two cheaters to be in love.

“Is anyone out there?”

“Yes, my lady!”

Smiling, I handed my letter to the servant who rushed in. “Send this to the imperial palace as quickly as possible.”

Compared to the great duke, I had nothing. But as the saying went, “When you’re in a bind, make use of the public mind.”

In one stroke, I’d turned my husband into a limp-dick in the eyes of the public. What bliss.