Friday is Max and Zeke's birthday.

The week went by in a blur, mostly consisting of Barnes and Max bickering and his asshole friends making gay jokes.

But Friday is their birthday and after Zeke's game (which also went by in a blur, Max decided to actually take a nap, which he succeeded in) Gina picked them up and they went back to the apartment.

As soon as Max walks in, he sees a cake.

A chocolate cake.

"Wow." Max nods in approval at Gina, who smiles back at him.

Gina usually buys the cake, and Max and Zeke get gifts for each other. So, after they eat cake, Max gets Zeke's gift (a pair of new football gloves) from his side of the room and Zeke tells him that he will be right back and walks out of their fucking apartment.

What the fuck. Max is temporarily confused but decides that Zeke probably lost it or something, dumbass. Whatever, it's Max's turn to one-up him. Zeke always gets him a better gift and it pisses him off.

Like last year Zeke got him an assortment of markers. There were like a hundred of them, he still has them. It's awesome really.

Max is sitting on the bed, the box in his hands and a frown on his face as he waits for Zeke to fucking get back in here, which he eventually does. Good.

Zeke has a slightly larger box in his hands, and the lid is slidable, and is cracked, with a big bow on it.

They exchange presents and Zeke sits on his bed and Max sits on his and Zeke says, "Let me open mine first."

Max furrows his eyebrows, "Why?"

"Just trust me."

Because Max does, in fact, trust Zeke, he decides to let Zeke open his first even though the tradition is to open them at the same time. Zeke opens his, muttering an 'oh sweet, mine were falling apart' before literally getting up and walking to Max's bed. He sits down and criss-crosses his legs, before facing Max.

"Okay, open it."

Max is about to, when he hears shuffling inside of it. "The fuck..." he mutters, sliding the top open and almost dropping it in shock.

His amber eyes meet its mix-matched eyes. Seriously, they are two different colors, and he is immediately in love.

Zeke got him a kitten.

Max's eyes widen and he smiles the biggest smile probably ever. "Oh my..." he can't even speak.

He looks up at Zeke, who looks very proud of himself. "You've been asking for a cat for seventeen years"

Max looks down to see the black and white (two colors he's sure of) kitten with its paws on the side of the box and it's head peeping out. He slowly reaches in, very gently, and lets the small cat sniff his finger. It sits down and stares at him.

"Hey, buddy."

"It's a girl."

Max rolls his eyes. "She's stilll my buddy." He is eventually able to get the cat to sit on his palm. He slowly lifts her up and cradles her to his chest, then he has a minor freak out.

"Shit, Gina's gonna kill us!" Max looks at Zeke with a worried expression.

"I already know." He hears a voice from the doorway and whips his head around to see Gina standing there. He gives her a sheepish smile, "Thank you."

She smiles back, "What are you gonna name her?"

Max thinks for a moment, before his coloring page cat from last Friday pops up in his head. "Lawrence."

Gina gives him a look like he has lost his mind. He gets that look a lot, now that he thinks about it. He can't decide if that's good or bad.

"Dude, what the fuck?"

"Language!"

"But that's a guy's name!"

Max turns to glare at him. "Her name is Lawrence and you can suck my ass if you have a fucking problem with it."

He hears a mew from his chest and looks down to see the kitten staring up at him.

Max nods, looking up at Zeke. "Yeah, and you can suck her ass too."

Zeke rolls his eyes, "whatever. I'm tired."

Max rolls his eyes back.

Zeke had bought the kitten some litter and some kitten chow, along with two food bowls. Max tears the lid off of a small box and sets everything up, placing the cat inside.

He takes the litter and makes a small pile of it in the corner, hoping the cat would get the idea.

He's pretty sure he did something wrong but oh well, he usually does something wrong.

After he has gotten everything ready, he is eventually able to fall asleep.

-

The next day is very stressful.

Gina had work and Zeke had a Saturday practice and Max is left all alone, freaking out about Lawrence.

He's never had a cat before. He's always wanted one but he's never gotten one. And he is freaking out.

He's spent the whole day with the cat and it keeps on wandering off and almost falling off of things and just overall fucking shit up. He doesn't know what to do, he just knows that he has to keep a fucking eye on Lawrence or else she is gonna get injured. This is a problem, since he is already injured. He doesn't have the agility to be dealing with this.

Then he gets an idea.

Barnes has a cat.

Max doesn't know if he still does or what, all he knows is that he needs some legitimate help with this because he doesn't know what to do and he's freaking the fuck out. He definitely did not think this whole thing through.

But he doesn't even know if Barnes is working and the time is-

6:58

Shit.

His hand is on his phone and dialing the number before he even fully processes it.

"Marco's, what can I get you?"

Fuck. It's that lady again.

"Um, is Ba-" Max clear his throat. "I mean, is Lewis working?"

Max hears the woman yelling out something and before he knows it, Barnes is on the phone. "What do you want?"

Max takes a deep breath. Fuck this is going to be hard.

"I... I need your help." Max watches Lawrence walk towards the end of the coffee table and quickly picks her up, clutching her to his chest. She mews.

"Uh, is that a cat?" He hears Barnes' questioning tone.

"Yes- uh, you have a cat right?"

"Had one, yes."

Max nods to himself. "Okay, I know this is a lot to ask but I got a cat for our birthday-"

"You had a birthday?"

"Yeah. Yesterday. But I don't know how to treat her and she is walking around and  trying to get injured and I don't know what to do."

Max is seriously freaking the fuck out. He is already smitten with this cat.

"I have plans with Lauren."

Oh man. Oh fuck. This is not good, this is not a good fucking thing. He doesn't know anyone else who has a cat and he doesn't know what the fuck to do to keep Lawrence safe and holy shit this is not fucking good goddammit.

"I...uh," Max gulps. He feels like he might have a legit panic attack. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. "I- I understand, you have a life and occupations and a girlfriend and holy shit ow! What the fuck?!" Lawrence sinks her claws into his chest and begins trying to climb him.

"Wha- ow! I'm not a fucking ladder." Max sighs, half pained.

"Are you okay?" Max hears Barnes' exasperated voice through his phone.

"Yeah. Yeah I'm good I just- I'll go. Everything will work out, everything will work out, She is gonna be okay..." he chokes on his breath. "Oh, what the fuck am I doing? Why did I even want a cat..." Max is fucking panicking.

"I'll cancel."

...uh...

What? Max didn't hear that right, there's no way Barnes just said that. Cancel on his beautiful girlfriend that's perfect and could do no wrong? No. They are in love beyond human comprehension. Max is not worth it, Barnes has to want to be out with his girlfriend instead...

"You... you'll cancel?" Max hates how hopeful and how much calmer he sounds.

"I'll be over in about ten minutes."

Max doesn't have time to thank him multiple times because Barnes hangs up quickly after that.

Holy shit. Max can't believe this. There's no way Barnes just said that, he'd much rather hang out with Lauren than Max. Max knows that. Everyone knows that. Hell, Lawrence knows that.

He puts Lawrence on his palm and holds her up so that she is eye level with him.

"Help is on the way, you clumsy dork." He rubs his nose against hers.

The next ten minutes consist of exactly what was happening before. Trying to keep Lawrence from fucking shit up.

Eventually he hears a knock on the door and praises all of the gods above. However, he doesn't want to leave his station on the floor because fuck knows that he can't trust Lawrence by herself.

"Come in! I think it's unlocked!" He listens as the door opens and closes, and eventually he hears footsteps walk into the kitchen.

Afterwards, he  picks Lawrence up and sets her in his lap. He looks down at Lawrence who had begun kneading on his pajama pants. "Ow, shit!"

He hears the footsteps walk over beside him, and sit down. Max turns to face him, with Lawrence still kneading his pants. "I don't know what to do, she keeps almost hurting herself or fucking shit up. Or both."

He meets Barnes' eyes, which are filled with amusement. "You called me in a hysterical state of panic over a kitten?"

"Yes! I told you over the phone!" Max glares at him.

"What's her name?" He asks, staring at the kitten. A small smile forming on his lips.

"Lawrence."

He hears Barnes burst into laughter. "You named a female cat Lawrence?" He looks at Max in disbelief, who glares at him. "Yes. It fits her. Fuck off."

It is then that Max sees Barnes notice her eyes.

"Woah..." he leans forward, letting her sniff his hand. "Do you know how rare that is?" He raises his eyebrows at Max. Max is still focused on the fact that Lawrence is still on his lap and Barnes is reaching places Barnes doesn't need to be reaching.

"Uh... y-yeah, what colors are they?" He asks Barnes who still has his eyebrows raised at him.

"Your eye color and my eye color."

Max looks at him in shock, "what?"

"Gold and green."

They are still in an eye lock and Max quickly breaks it. "The exact shade?" He asks, smiling down at the kitten who is now just sitting on his leg and looking up at him.

"Pretty much."

It is then that Lawrence makes her way away from Max's leg and Max expects her to go get into some bullshit, but instead she walks over to Barnes and climbs his leg.

Barnes just smiles and she begins literally rubbing her face on his abdomen. He looks up at Max. "I think she likes me more."

Max frowns. "No she doesn't."

Max is proven considerably incorrect when she begins purring, before flopping down on his upper thigh. She then starts licking his shirt and curling up and eventually falls asleep.

Barnes smirks at him, giving him a smug look.

Max doesn't really care, he simply gives him a relieved smile, and flops back on his back. He spreads his limbs out and sighs, closing his eyes.

He realizes that that is probably the first time that he has smiled at Barnes in a way that isn't mocking or hysterical.

"I'm just glad she's not fucking shit up anymore."

He hears Barnes start laughing and he smiles, keeping his eyes closed.

"I'm just glad that you aren't freaking out over the phone while I'm about to get off work."

Max starts laughing, opening an eye. "I didn't think you'd be there, I mean, it was 6:58..." he closes his eyes again.

He hears Barnes stop laughing and decides that he doesn't care enough to open them again.

"You keep track of when I get off work?"

Max's eyes shoot open and he looks at Barnes as if he'd been caught.

"Well yeah... uh, 7 o'clock. The first time I called it was six fifty something and I did the whole common sense and process of elimination thing and..." he gathers his breath agin, and just gives up. Oh well.

"That's a little creepy."

Max sits up, criss-crossing his legs and facing Barnes. "You're a little creepy."

Barnes rolls his eyes, looking back down at Lawrence.

Max smiles, scooting closer to Barnes so that he can reach Lawrence easier and he pets her on her back. He then realizes that he is also reaching somewhere that he should never be reaching and he broke the two foot rule.

Oh well, Lawrence is adorable and as long as Barnes doesn't get mad and pin him on the floor or some shit then maybe he'll be okay.

Their legs are touching.

Shut the fuck up! It's perfectly normal for two guys to pet an animal and end up close together. She's a small cat, it takes a lot to reach her.

You just accidentally touched his abdomen.

Ignore it, ignore it, ignore it...

His crotch is three inches away from your hand.

Max's hand shoots back to his chest as he holds it. Fuck. That was uncalled for. He grasps his wrist tightly and and squeezes his eyes shut,

Fuck fuck fuck. This is not good.

What is happening to him?

He coughs into his shirt and opens his eyes, sending a very intense glare into the floor. He needs to seriously get over whatever is going on with him. He's probably sick, honestly.

"Are you okay?"

Max snaps his head up and locks eyes with Barnes.

"Uh- uh, yes! Yeah I'm good I just..." quick, think of something.

Their faces are six inches apart.

Max shakes his head. Stupid thoughts, this is why he has the two foot rule that keeps getting broken.

"She's right next to your- uh, I mean Lawrence is on your lap by... I don't want to pet her because..." fuck he is digging himself a grave. Barnes gives him a knowing smirk, his eyebrows raising.

"And I can't trust my depth perception! I don't want to... just ignore it, okay?!" Max winces at himself, closing his eyes.

When he opens them again, working up enough courage to meet Barnes' he almost falls back in shock. Barnes is now three inches away and the two feet rule is long broken and shit.

"You're scared because she's right next to my crotch?"

Max swears Barnes practically purred that. He seriously stops breathing, and gulps. This did not go as planned. And at first he's staring into Barnes' eyes until eventually they trail down to - of course - his lips.

Damn, his lips.

Max licks his teeth and he is again entranced by Barnes' lips. Seriously, Barnes has to notice. There's no way he doesn't. Max is too scared to look into his eyes and find out.

"Y- yeah..." Max gulps. "I can't trust my- my eyes usually and..."

He seriously can't breathe. He blinks multiple times and decides that to prove his point further, he's going to clean his glasses.

He somehow musters up the strength to take them off and use them as an excuse to look away from Barnes' lips and he feels down for the bottom of his shirt. He is eventually able to navigate through cleaning them and everything and when he puts them back on he looks back up to Barnes, who's still smirking.

"W- what?" Barnes is still looking at him like he knows something.

"Lawrence is walking away."

Max panics, looking around until he actually does spot her making her way towards the kitchen.

"No! Lawrence!" He scoots over to her and picks her up.

He levels her with his face and frowns. "Lawrence, you need to stop being a dumbass."

The cat mews, and presses her paw on Max's nose. He goes cross eyed to look at it. Giving a small nod he scoots back at a two feet distance in front of Barnes. He sets her in front of them.

He hears the door open. "Max! I got us Wendy's!"

Max's eyes widen as he looks towards the door.

Oh shit. Max is never gonna live this down. He can practically feel Zeke teasing him about needing help to babysit a kitten.

Shit.