“They’re packing up my dorm.” Terrance said in a curt, polite tone. “When they bring my things here, I’ll be giving them my uniform.”

Roman nodded. “Then I’ll leave you two to rest – I’ll have my FAN come by in a couple hours with comm for you.” he held out his hand and Terrance held out his hand, Roman taking a bracelet out of his hand to put it on Terrance’s wrist. “You are to keep this on you at all times so I can see where you are. If that come’s off, so does your head.”

I shivered, Terrance nodding.

Roman nodded a little as he looked between us. “Welcome to Greater Lakes.” He said then with a little sweep of his hand.

Terrance thank him but I just stared at Roman with a slack jaw, scratching my head as Terrance led me into the hotel.

“If I wasn’t a homosexual before, I’m really, really a homosexual now.” I said firmly, Terrance letting out a little laugh, pinching me before he pulled me against him, wrapping an arm around my shoulders.

Terrance spoke to the clerk before we went up a couple flights of stairs to our room, and I took a moment to look around it.

It was big.

Nice.

I silently took off my jacket and dropped it to the floor as Terrance closed the room’s door and locked it, sighing loudly and mumbling to himself.

I toed off my shoes, going over to the bed to sit on the bottom listlessly, my stomach heavy. I looked toward the window to stare out at the lake. Terrance came toward me and I stood then, walking by him to stare out the window at the waters, boats cutting through the gentle waves. I thought about the ocean not far form Liliport, the waters of the river that the city sat on.

This was much prettier. There were boats all decked out for Easter, and it looked like they were having a race as well.

It was just...so serene.

“I never realized Campora was so beautiful.” I said quietly.

“Parts are, I guess.” Terrance mumbled as he came up behind me, wrapping his arms around me to kiss my cheek, then my neck. “How are you?” He whispered in my ear.

“Sad.” I said without missing a beat, my gaze following a small ship as it moved on the waves. “Very sad.”

“What can I do for you?” He asked gently, his arms tightening around me. “Tell me what I can do to make you feel better.”

I shrugged my shoulders as I leaned back, my eyes fluttering closed as I felt tears well up again. “I’m just tired.” I croaked, my throat feeling raw. “How long can we stay here?”

“Weeks. Months.” He mumbled. “I spoke with the Campora matriarch briefly on the way up. She’ll cover the bill in exchange for me training her grandsons for the juvenile summer games.” I sniffled, frowning. “I won them when I was a kid.”

“Won them,” I mocked, sneering “There are over two hundred games. What the fuck did you win?”

“Um, the throwing ones. All of the throwing ones.” A pause. “Yeah. The throwing ones.”

I let out a bark of laughter, Terrance’s chest rumbling against my back as he chuckled. “Thank you for not elaborating. I would have been in great pain had you of said the specific games you had one.” I said sarcastically.

“I had a feeling you would be,” He purred, kissing my ear before he sucked lightly on my earlobe. It felt nice, but it was a poor distraction from the hole in my chest and the rock in my gut. “Come cuddle with me and I’ll tell you my master plan to fix things for us.”

I sighed hard at that, screwing my eyes closed before I nodded, turning to wrap my arms around him then to embrace him tightly. He held me back, his strong arms wrapped tightly around me. Occasionally he’d shuffle back and I’d shuffle after him, the two of us very, very slowly making our way to the bed.

When we got there I finally dropped my arms away, Terrance still holding onto me as I struggled to summon the energy to unbutton my shirt, dropping it down between us. I rested my cheek on his shoulder as I undid my pants, pushing them down and stepping out of them before I leaned heavily against him.

My forehead touched the cross and moon pendant he wore, and I broke.

I cried hard then as he stripped down to just his boxers, Terrance dragging me under the covers to hold me as I sobbed.

I don’t know how long I cried, but I cried until it hurt, my stomach ached from it and my lungs burning terribly. When I settled, he went and got my necklace, having fished it out of the trash when we were at the colony station.

I stayed in bed for a long time, watching the waters.

When the sun came up on Easter, the windows protected so the light wouldn’t hurt Terrance, Terrance turned on the television and we sat and watched the Easter service for Campora, the sapien matriarch giving a special sermon with the Victorian sapien matriarch about peace, celebrating the start of the new Christian colony – the River Colony.

The matriarch herself came with Roman the next day with paperwork for us to sign.

She had spoken with both our clan leaders and swore them both to secrecy so no one knew I didn’t join the colony, and they had agreed to our marriage, but because Terrance was leaving Victoria for Campora, they agreed it would just be better if we were to leave both clans and start our own, something that the matriarch supported, having us technically be a new branch of hers. She told us to take our time, and once we were done, we would go over any other details pertaining to our residency in Campora.

Mainly it was just a lot of stupid stuff that Terrance most filled out, leaving just one single thing left.

“What do you want our names to be?” I asked as we were laying in bed together.

“You pick.” He said quietly, turning to lay his legs across my thighs. “I want you to pick our family name. Make it cute.” He said around his cigarette, the first one he had smoked in months because I told him I thought they were gross.

Roman had offered him a pack as a peace offering, and Terrance had accepted it, so I told him it was okay to smoke this last one as my own peace offering for...all of his life to join me in Campora. The peacekeepers understood, and the official story was that he was devastated of his mate joining the colony and had to be admitted to a long term clinic in Campora for now, but…

Anyone that needed to know the truth, knew.

I stared at him, watching as he puffed and tried to make rings with his smoke. “I can’t decide that. It’s to important.” I said then. He gave me a curious look. I blinked at him. “I want you to do it.” I swallowed thickly. “I think that’d make it easier for me.”

He pulled a face, shrugging a shoulder. “Then…” He sighed, scooting down a little so his thighs were on mine, his hand reaching down to scratch idly at my lower back. “How about...Abbott?” I frowned, looking at him. “You’re a pastor. Abbott means ‘priest’. Ford and Terrance Abbott.” He said around his cigarette.

I thought on that for a minute, thinking it over. “Isiah Abbott.” I said then, smiling a little. When Terrance gave a crabby ‘who?’ I smiled at him, laughing a little. “I always wanted a son named Isiah. And a daughter named Anna.”

“Anna Abbott. I like that.” He said with a crooked smile. “I rather us just have girls, though. I don’t get along so well with little boys.” He said with a tight look. “I only know how to smack little boys, and I’d rather not be a Dad that just...smacks their kids all the time...and little novus boys need to be smacked. A lot.” He said flatly. He grinned up at me, saying with his cigarette clenched between his teeth. “I’d rather be the only novus in our household getting smacked.”

I frowned, thinking on that. “Isa Abbott….Izzy and Annie Abbott.” I said with a little more confidence. Terrance grinned wide and I grinned as well, my eyes watering. “Yeah. I think that would be nice.” I nodded, clearing my throat. “Abbott will do just fine.”

“Alright. I’ll put it in for us.” He said, rolling a little to grab the papers, setting them on his stomach to pat around for the pen. I watched as he wrote out our new names and I smiled as I lifted my gaze to smile at the window.

Abbott.

Not bad at all.

I looked at where our names were together and I felt my heart soar.

I felt...very safe, sharing his name.

Being a pair.

I didn’t realize until now that I hadn’t ever felt safe before – not in the basement of our church while we waited for the world to end, not in my mother’s arms while we listened to sermons about God punishing sinners, and not even when I was with my family.

Not once.

But I did now, and what was so sinful about that?