Ah, Twilight. The "iconic" fanfiction-esque vampire stalker romance novel and movie series. It blows me away that this was written by a woman! Usually, these weird, supernatural stalker romance stories are written by men because presumably, women usually know what other women enjoy reading. Or maybe she does know, since its' managed to attract young women like myself, and lonely housewives in their 40s. Mostly tween girls, though. However many people love to claim it's not just for young girls, who the actual corn nuts is over fifteen reading this crap? I'm not even over fifteen, and I've never been interested in this shiny, cringe-inducing, stalker vampire mess of a "romance" series! Now, enough of me. What is the plot of Twilight?

SORT OF OK PLOTLINE

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According to Wikipedia, "It is the first book in the Twilight series and introduces seventeen-year-old Isabella 'Bella' Swan, who moves from Phoenix, Arizona, to Forks, Washington. She is endangered after falling in love with Edward Cullen, a 103-year-old vampire frozen in his 17-year-old body.". The plot is ok, I guess? It's definitely a cheesy romance novel for thirteen-year-old girls to fawn over, but there's nothing wrong with that! But, the worst is yet to come. There are multiple scenes of creepy moments between Edward and Bella, such as Edward watching her sleep and trying to make her scared of him, and Bella isn't innocent either! She took his efforts to distance himself from her as a joke and used her eventual pregnancy by Edward against him. He tells her that having a vampire baby when she isn't a vampire would kill her. Which makes sense, and it almost does kill her. However, she decides to keep their baby and stays around her werewolf love interest, Jacob, so she can have the baby with him and his pack. Neither are good people, and they should not be together. Overall, it's just not a good series. Sorry if this didn't seem in-depth enough, but I desperately don't want to read or watch it. I think I would need chocolate milk and holy water just to get through five minutes of the movie or book.