Dakota's pov

It's Monday today and it started miserably but everything changed with everything that happened earlier.

It wasn't the best but I got to see my love even if it was in secret. Which teenager doesn't like being with their love? It's so rare to see them I swear.

Regardless, my love is far from what I do overall in life, unfortunately. I only see them once every blue mood. I'm exaggerating but yeah. We're dating in secret. No one knows and no one knows we know each other. It hurts but I have to accept my love's decision.

So, what kind of life do I have when I'm not with them? Lots! Ok, I'm kidding.

I have no friends unfortunately but that's normal.

No one understands me anyway. I'm so different. It's not my looks or what I identify as. It's what I like and where I come from.

I'm a nerd but not a nerd, nerd, oddly enough. I love learning new stuff and books, oh books! I like drama.

Ok, ok who I am really? Who's this crazy alien psycho? Well, I'm not known exactly but my name is Dakota Koval and I'm mostly kkoke for being the transfer girl aka Ukrainian girl.

Yes, Ukraine. I come from Ukraine. Last year, I had to flee Ukraine with my family due to the war.

It still hunts me and it's traumatizing but I've been coping. It's been a year. I miss home but after a year being here in America, I actually enjoy it.

I grew to enjoy America. America is so interesting and people from here too. It's such a different lifestyle from home but I like it. It's interesting and different.

There's so much knowledge here to learn and it's so cool. Even though it seems like new people aren't welcome here or LGBTQ+ friendly here, it's way better than back home. I feel safe here which is important.

Through, I prefer talking about the teenage part. Being a teenager in America is way better and filled with drama! It's crazy, back home everything was so dull.

Even though I experimented with stuff since I moved here last year, I haven't had the full experience. I have no friends. 

They can't say it's because I only talk Ukrainian. Yeah, no I'm good at English. Back home we learned English and I watched Metube videos in English. So, I speak well in English despite my accent.

I'll admit that it was quite a cultural shock when I first came and had to learn the slang and get used to the American accent but it's fine overall.

I mentioned I was a nerd. It's true but not the nerd the others see me as. It's not my fault I'm so much better in school because the school system in America is mediocre. The academic side. It's inferior compared to Ukraine.

We learn so much more stuff for instance, how on earth Americans are so bad at Geography. It's easy! Even if it is, they don't even know where Ukraine is. Sad, very pathetic.

Ok, ok now I sound mean. I criticize others but in reality, I wish I could make friends. I have Kilian but they don't want to be near me in public. Ok, I have a twin sister too, Emily but she would rather not be near me either. She already made her American friends and she has a boyfriend.

I could try to make some friends but the truth is that the others are so different. They wouldn't get me as Kilian does.

There are multiple reasons for that. For instance, I've been recently diagnosed with ADHD. It has definitely been affecting me a lot. I'm always hyperactive, but sometimes I lack attention and lose focus. That's why I say I'm not the typical nerd but I'm sure I'm smart regardless.

Then, there's my gender identity. I always knew I was different, especially in the last few years but I couldn't pinpoint why as it wasn't accepted in Ukraine.

So, ever since I moved here, I got the chance to learn the real terms and I'm glad I did. I got the chance to learn the spectrum of gender and I figured out that I was gender-fluid.

Yeah, my gender is pretty fluid, it's never the same thing. Sometimes I feel feminine, sometimes masculine or other times just non-binary. It depends and fluctuates.

As for the case for my name, my name isn't actually Dakota, that's my preferred name which no one uses except Kilian. My birth name is Dixie Koval. Strangely enough, it's that but I guess my parents wanted my sister and me to have American names. Maybe we were destined to move here.

I prefer Dakota through as it's gender-neutral and Dixie is just wack. Yes, I am biologically a woman as everyone sees me as but that's just a word. It's not the rules of biology that will rule my gender.

So yeah, there are not a lot of LGBTQ+ people in this school or they are all closeted. Most people accept gay people but not gender talk.

Ugh, enough about that, it's too boring to talk about that. In fact, I get brought back to reality once I notice Kilian with their friend Charlie sitting together at a table. Oh, how I wish I could go talk to him and them. It's heartbreaking that I have to pretend I don't know my own lover Kilian.

Charlie seems so sweet and based on my own research, he's a nice guy and he respects Kilian's gender. He's gay too I believe. Oh, now I badly want to talk to Kilian.

It's sad to know that I just saw them this morning and right now it's only lunchtime. I know that means I don't know when will be the next time I get to see them and talk to them.

I could text them I know but the thing is, I don't have their contact information.

Yeah, apparently we'll play I don't know when video games together but that's all I know.

Ugh, I need to find a way to talk to Kilian.

Anyways, my thoughts get interrupted by something interesting.

The one and only basketball captain Maverick Campbell is just now joining them at their table and he's not with his top cheerleading girlfriend, Makayla Shewell.

That's so interesting and strange at the same time. Why would such a guy join the table of almost nobodies? Kilian and Charlie are far from popular. What would attract him?

Hmm...oh, he's talking to Charlie. Thank goodness he's not talking to my boo. I don't need to be even more jealous and envious than I already am.

Why would Maverick of all people talk to Charlie? Charlie is indeed good in arts but that doesn't interest Maverick in the slightest bit. Oh! They are laughing now!

That's some juicy drama there. I really want to know what's going on there! Kilian is so lucky to be at the same table as Maverick Campbell! Now I really wish I could talk to Kilian. I really need to find out how!

———————

Lunchtime is now over and it's now English. Luckily enough I'm in the same class as Makayla Shewell the top cheerleader, Emery Blackwell the best soccer player and even Maverick Campbell. I really wish Kilian would be in my English class but let's face it they are in almost none of my classes.

I sit down in the back as I usually do. As soon as I sit down, Emery comes in with her dominating aura and her blond ponytail, she sits down not too far from me, then a way too happy Makala sits down right in front of her.

This is like the third time this has happened strangely enough. I thought it wouldn't last but I guess she really doesn't want to sit next to her boyfriend anymore.

Just like last time Makayla starts talking to Emery who shuts her down. Wow, this is so interesting to watch. Now I wish we were allowed to have popcorn in here. There's so much juicy drama here.

Seriously at this rate, I'll start thinking Maverick and Makayla broke up and now they are both gay. Why is Makayla of all people talking to Emery the legendary girl? Emery doesn't like her.

Damn, this is what I mean when I say there's full of drama in American high schools.

Ms McLeod starts her class and everyone stops talking. She starts explaining a group project we have to do about a book in a group of two. Apparently, we are free to make our groups.

So, as soon she's done explaining, everyone gathers in teams. Makayla surprisglynl doesn't team up with Maverick and instead somehow manages to team up with Emery.

Her boyfriend, the basketball player immediately gets paired up with one of his friends. Awh, why did I think I could actually pair up with him? I must be crazy.

So, that leaves me with no teammate. I check around to see who doesn't have a teammate and funny enough it's only Ethan who isn't paired up.

Gosh, Ethan how is he here? He usually skips English class. Oh well, I'm not surprised no one wants to pair up with him, he's the school bad boy.

So, this automatically means I have to ask him
to pair up with me.

He's not that bad, it's just I fear he won't want to work on this. Oh, screw it, I can't miss my only chance to pair up with a bad boy. Another high school experience.

I get up and go to his desk. He looks at me confused.

"Hey, want to pair up? I've got no partner."

"Sure" He finally starts smiling. Well, that's good I guess?

"Come to my desk."

"Yeah, we might as well do that."

We go to my desk and sit down.

"So, I figure you don't want to work on this book?" He laughs.

"Yeah, you figured me out. Books aren't my thing."

"I have bad news for you, books are my favourite." He looks at me disappointed.

"Ugh, you're not gonna force me to work on this, are you?"

"It's only for this period."

"You're accent is nice. You're from...?" Oh, so he's changing the topic. How nice. I laugh.

"Why're you laughing? I said something dumb didn't I?"

"No, it's just that you changed the topic but it's cool. I'm from Ukraine by the way." He suddenly seems really interested.

"Ukraine? You came here from the war?"

"I'm impressed that you know about the Ukrainian war." He seems offended.

"Hey! I'm not that dumb! I'm just a bad boy that's all." I laugh and he ends up laughing too.

Ok, ok am I seriously getting along with a bad boy? Is it a dumb thing to think he could be my friend?

"We should work on the book unless you want to talk about Ukraine all class long."

"I'll be cool but maybe you're right."

———————

For the rest of the class, we ended up working well together and doing a decent job. He isn't nearly as I thought he was. I don't know why he skips English Class but I guess that's a mystery.

Through, I think it is too far-fetched to say he might be my first friend. He's still the number one bad boy. If the rumours are true he sells drugs so yeah, I should be still weary.

Regardless, English class is over and I yet again notice Kilian as though they are alone. They are about to go to the washroom. This is the perfect opportunity to talk to them!

I follow them and end up surprising myself by going to the boy's washroom. Luckily no one is there other than Kilian.

"Kilian."

They turn around abruptly and look at me shocked.

"Dakota! What are you doing in the boy's washroom?"

"I wanted to talk to you."

"Can't you see you're not allowed in here?"

"Well...I am gender-fluid so..."

"Ok, ok I get your point but why are you here? I thought I made it clear to not talk to me at school?"

"As I said I wanted to talk to you."

"You won't budge, will you?" They say frustrated. Why is Kilian frustrated? They are supposed to be happy to see me!

"No...actually to avoid such a thing, I would like to get your phone number."

"My phone number?" They say surprised and confused.

"Yeah, that way I can talk to you, text you and call you when I want to."

"Why are you asking for that now?"

"I think it's unfair I never get to know when I'll see you next time or get to talk to you again. Do you keep forgetting we're dating?" They look
at me shocked and instantly panicking.

"Shh! Don't ever say that out loud like that."

"But it's the truth."

"I know, now come. I'll give you my number to make sure this never happens again." It's harsh the way they talk to me but I guess I have to get used to it...

I come closed and they give me their contact.

"There, are you happy?" I am but...that isn't enough. I don't want to say goodbye just yet...

An idea comes to mind and I insanely do it without thinking. I kiss them and they instantly push me away.

"What are you doing?! We're at school!"

"Why are you so afraid to talk to me at school?! I'm your boo! You should respect me more than that!" They get silent.

Ugh...I hate it when they do that. It means they won't follow through with what I say.

"Why do you demand so many things all of a sudden? Where is this coming from?"

"I'm simply growing bold. I've thought those things from the very start."

"Wow...ok. I get you want to talk to me at school but I like how things are right now." That hurts...My heart breaks into million pieces but I remain strong.

"What about seeing me out of school...?"

"Out of school? Geez, Dakota you want to see me often, huh? Quite clingy."

"Why does Charlie get to be with you all the time?" They get caught off guard by that.

"So...you're jealous of Charlie? Charlie has feelings for Maverick, I have no feelings of that sort for him. Quit being jealous." Interesting?

"I wasn't hinting at that but ok."

"About what you asked, are you asking to see each other at our secret place or...somewhere else?" Why is that making me have pervy thoughts?

"I wouldn't mind seeing each other more often in our secret place but are you suggesting to see each other at our houses?" He gets taken off guard by that.

"Oh...you want that?"

"Is that not an option?"

"I just...didn't think about it but...yeah, I'm not sure I'm comfortable with that..."

"Why is that?"

"I don't want my parents to ask questions and start thinking I'm back to normal." Oh...that's sad Kilian never told me that before.

"Are your parents against your gender identity?"

"Yeah..."

"Oh, you could come to mine." They look at me surprised.

"Really? Your parents wouldn't mind?"

"Nope, in fact, you could come tonight."

"Tonight? It's a Monday..."

"My sister will be at her boyfriend's and my parents are going to marriage therapy."

"Oh..." Awkward...

"Yeah..."

"Ok...but I want to be in peace...no crazy stuff. Do you have a console or something?" Omg! They said yes!!!!

"Yeah, my sister has one because she likes it for some reason since we moved here."

Suddenly, a guy gets in.

"What's a girl doing here."

"Oops sorry. I guess it's my cue to leave." I smile one last time at Kilian and leave.

It's time to go to class but right now I couldn't be any happier!

—————-

Yesterday was perfect and special! I not only invited someone over for the first time since moving here but Kilian my love was in my house! I'm so happy!

I feel like the fact we got to see each other out of school and way more often, helps a lot.

As happy as I am, I am forced to go back to school but finally today it's History, one of my favourites.

I get in and sit down in the back. Not many people I know are in this class, though this is the only class where Kilian and Charlie are both in my class.

Gosh, I wish I could sit down next to them but I can't.

Regardless, Mr. Washington starts the class.

"Good morning students, we have a new transfer student, please welcome them." Huh? A transfer student?!

As if on cue, a tall shy Latina girl gets in the class. Wow, she's pretty. She has long curly hair with some bangs too.

Wait..is it me or does she seem...trans? Omg! I want to become friends with her!

Wow, it's strange we have a transfer student in mid-March on a Tuesday but it's perfect, it's some new drama that will change everything.