Yuko hadn’t been planning to push things in that direction, she just wanted both of them to be on the same page in case things naturally went in that direction. She realized in that moment, though, that Hell, yes she was going to let them handle her body if they wanted to. She had a feeling that Raph knew their way around a human body.
“Maybe? If the hike goes well and, uh, handling me is something that interests you, we could disc—”
“I’m interested.”
“Oh. Ok, duly noted.”
“What about you, Yuko? Are you interested?”
Well, damn. Raph didn’t beat around the bush. “I… I mean… Yeah, I am, I think.”
Raph looked at her calmly, holding her gaze.
“I am,” she corrected almost involuntarily, the words pulled out of her by the tractor beam of their New Age riz.
“Is that all you’re interested in?”
Were they asking about an ongoing relationship of some kind? Raph, the hippie rock lover and yoga instructor to whom all of the retreat’s MILFs sent DTF stares? What kind of “free love” was that? Shouldn’t Raph already be pushing for an acrobatic tantric threesome or something? What weird alternate universe had she stepped into? She dodged by answering a question with a question. “What if I say I don’t know?”
“Then I’ll think that you haven’t figured out what you want yet or that you’re hesitant to tell me what you want. Either way it’s alright. I’ll wait until you know one way or the other.”
Were they not going to touch her if she was only in it for sex? No way. No way in hell that’s what they meant.
“What if I tell you it’s both of those and it may be a while before I know,” she mumbled half-audibly, intently examining the forest. For bears. Safety first.
“What if you ask me some questions, then? You feel like someone who’s more comfortable when they’re in control of things. Get to know me better— you can ask me anything. I’ll be completely honest with you.”
She was vastly more comfortable when in control, as a matter of fact. Raph didn’t really need to reassure her about their honesty, though. She didn’t know all the things they were, but she was pretty confident that honest was one of those things. Apparently painfully so. So she asked them the question that was, honestly, foremost in her mind. “What answer were you hoping for when you asked if I was only interested in sex?”
“Well, primarily I was hoping for the truth, whatever it is, rather than a particular answer, but I think what you’re really asking is whether I am interested in you for reasons other than sex. The answer is yes. I find you fascinating, and while I would love to have sex with you, that would probably not satisfy my desire to spend time with you and learn more about you.”
‘Well, damn’ again. “Oh.”
“You don’t have any follow up questions about that? Or me?” Raph asked, not letting her hide at all.
Yuko’s hand flew up to fidget nervously with the hair at the nape of her neck. “No…That’s not…accurate. I have so many that I don’t know where to start.”
“That’s a relief.”
Why a relief? Who wanted to sit around answering questions about themselves, other than narcissists? But Raph didn’t strike her as a narcissist. She took the matter to an expert.
“Why is it a relief?”
“Because it makes it sound like you’re interested in me for more than sex as well.”
“You want me to be?”
“Yes.”
“Oh.” She felt like she’d stumbled onto some kind of nude beach for emotions. Who in the hell just said everything they thought and felt with no flirting and no games, though? What kind of crystal enables that? Crystal meth? Raph did the calm waiting thing again. Tractor beam engaged. Target acquired. In ten more seconds of peaceful silence, another big question was drawn out of her.
“You didn’t seem surprised when I told you about my transition. Did you already know?”
“No.”
“Have you dated or had sex with a trans person before?”
“Yes and no. I have dated and had sex with a man who did not identify as a man while we were dating but who has since transitioned.”
Interesting. Ok. More information needed. “Now that you know, how would that affect your likeliness to date him in the future?”
“It wouldn’t, but the fact that he is poly and I am not does. It had something to do with why we stopped seeing each other, actually. We’re still friends, though. He’s also my mechanic, and you should never give up a good mechanic if you can help it.”
Of course Raph stayed friendly with their exes. It was a skill that Yuko had not managed to acquire because her Qi was too blocked with pettiness or something, but she was happy for them. “I live in Manhattan, so I don’t drive, but I can imagine that’s true. So, you’re not poly. Ok. I’m not, either. I take it that means you are completely single?” Yuko reflected that this should probably have been her first question and not her tenth, or however many it had been.
“Correct. I am not in any kind of romantic relationship right now. When I’m looking for one, I do not really limit myself on who I date in terms of gender or trait or other identity categories. I do prefer to feel a strong connection with the people I date.”
“You feel one with me?”
Was it her imagination or did they just subtly snort? “I do. You could say that, yes.”
“Do you have kids? Pets?”
“No kids. As for pets, I travel too much for workshops and for concierge clients. It wouldn’t be fair. If I ever settle down in one place, though, I will probably have more than one.”
“Kids or pets?”
“Both. Either. I’m not picky. I just like a little chaos in my life. Blame it on my family.”
Yuko decided to hit them with both barrels. She half-wanted to scare them, because they were scaring her with all of their openness. “I am also completely single, and I also have no kids and no pets. I’d like a rabbit or two, though. I’m going to have two kids, I’ve got it all planned. One when I’m thirty-two and one when I’m thirty-four. Via surrogate. Using a donor egg. I froze sperm before my transition. If that doesn’t work out, I have a back-up plan—foster to adopt. Sometimes you gotta fight biology with science, you know what I mean? Or with the law…and money, to pay for all of it, obviously, which is why I work my ass off. So what about me is so fascinating to you?”
Raph mulled that over for a moment. “You’re kidding, right? Well, I saw you before anything else, and you’re absolutely beautiful, obviously. When you were talking with your friend, I thought you were very honest and funny. Now that you’re talking to me, I think that you are smart and unbelievably gutsy and passionate and hilarious and your energy is completely unlike that of anyone I’ve ever met. I’m... very... drawn to it.”
“What’s it like? The energy, I mean.”
“Energy's hard to describe, obviously, but yours makes me think of whitewater.”
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