As soon as we arrived home, I went and put on one of my sweat outfits and grabbed the new blanket Hunter had gotten me. Leaving my room, I found Hunter standing in the kitchen in a similar outfit, his deep blue where mine was mint green. He'd pulled his curls into a ponytail and was softly humming.

"Whatcha doin?" I called, coming over and poking him in the lower back.

"Makin' your hot chocolate," he smiled, turning around, "oh…"

"Hm?"

"I like this color on ya. That's all."

"You're embarrassing me," chewing my lip, I looked down at my feet, "your honesty is confusing sometimes."

"I don't mean to confuse ya. I'm sorry. I'm just tryin' to pay you a compliment. I mean it."

"I know," lifting my head, I laid a hand on his chest, "You're honest to a fault. I appreciate it about you."

"I'm glad," he covered my hand and squeezed softly, "can ya get the blankets we need and call the dogs in? I gotta finish this and get firewood together. Just wait for me on the deck."

"Mmkay."

I did as he asked, Bear and Moose wiggling excitedly before heading over to their beds, Hunter tossing them both treats. Taking a seat on the deck couch, I watched as he gathered up wood, starting a fire in the pit he had made and he pulled out two sleeping bags, laying them out first and zipping them together. He ran up and took 3 of the 4 blankets I had, laying one out, before rolling the other 2 as pillows.

"Alright. Come on," he came over to the deck, grabbing the tray that held the hot chocolate in a coffee pot, 2 mugs, and an entire jar of marshmallows.

I followed after, carrying my blanket, and sat on the makeshift bed, laying it out. Hunter joined me, sitting on my left, and set the tray next to him, before pulling the blanket onto his legs. He handed me a mug after pouring the hot chocolate and I leaned over him to grab a handful of marshmallows, dropping all but one into my mug. I tossed the final one into the air and caught it in my mouth, making Hunter laugh.

"Why are you laughing at me?"

"That was cute," he smiled, his cheeks red, as he took a sip of hot chocolate, watching the flames dance, "this was a good idea."

"I thought so too. Thank you for making it come true."

"It wasn't hard. Ya coulda asked for anythin' and I'd have made it happen."

"Little moments like this are more important to me."

"Me too. I wanted to ask ya somethin' that's been botherin' me since dinner."

"Is it about why I don't want to go to college?

"Mhm."

"It was never truly my dream," I whispered, "it was moms. She wanted to be a vet. But my mom had her life ruined. Not that I think I ruined her life. She loved being my mother, that was very clear. But my birth father destroyed any dreams she would have had. Her entire life changed to keep both of us fed and clothed. I have simple dreams. I want to get married someday. Use a surrogate to have a few babies. Take care of a house with my partner. Basically, just be a house husband. All I want from life is stability and true love. I have no need for lofty dreams. Well, I did have one. I wanted to write children’s books.”

Hunter was staring at the fire, clearly lost in thought before he sighed softly, "I'm sorry that happened. That she felt as though she lost out on her dreams. I like the sound of the life ya want. You should give writin’ a shot. You’re smart. I bet you could do it."

"I might. Anyway, I had a question for you too."

"What is it?"

"Hazel told me you shut yourself off from people on purpose. Why?"

"I… there was a boy. His name was Dakota. Mrs. Grady's grandson. We were close and I had a crush on him. I just didn't know what that meant at the time. I was 16. That was when I realized I was gay. He was the only friend I had. I told him that I wanted to try kissin' him. That I liked him. He laughed and called me a lot of really messed up shit. Spit in my face. I was already bigger than him. So I knocked 2 of his teeth out. Decided not to open up again. If that's how someone I thought liked me too would treat me… I felt so stupid. So I never let anyone close again. I'm scared to be close. Share how I'm feelin' and get laughed at again. Wasn't worth it to me. When I told ya I wouldn't go out of my way for anyone as I have for you, I meant that."

"So why are you doing it for me?" I whispered, looking down at my lap.

"I haven't figured it out yet. But I don’t think you'd turn your back on me, laugh at me. I guess… I trust you. That you clearly enjoy bein' at my side."

"Just because one dickhead treated you like that doesn't mean I will. You can tell me anything, ask me anything and I'll be honest and never judge you."

"Ya ever dated anyone?"

"No."

"Why?" He set his mug down and wrapped an arm around my shoulder, pulling me to his side.

"My mom told me to wait until I found someone who treated me with respect and kindness. Someone who was my best friend first. To build a relationship, not fall into things just to have company."

"That's good advice. I've never been with anyone either."

"I know. Hazel told me," I laughed, looking up at him.

"I'd kick her but she's pregnant so I'll wait," he smiled, touching my cheek gently, "your eyes are… wait do you see that?" He pointed off in front of us and I quickly turned my head.

There was a sudden warmth on my face, a bit of scruff and I realized he was kissing my cheek. My entire face flared and I gripped the blanket. The smell of his soap, raspberry and rum, mixed with the chocolate on his breath overwhelmed my senses and all I could focus on was the warmth of his lips on my cheek, the feeling of his beard against my skin.

"H… Hunter?" I stuttered as he pulled back.

"I'm sorry. I always feel like when I leave ya to go to work or when I come in for lunch or dinner, there's been somethin' missin'. A hug or… a soft kiss on your cheek. I was right but I'm bein' foolish, I know."

"What do you mean foolish?" I couldn't look at him, my heart was racing, warmth still flooding me.

"To think that after such a short period of time, you'd be interested in me. I'm so simple, Gray. Every touch makes me nervous. Even that… that little kiss took all of my bravery."

"Oh… but… Hunter, I had the same thoughts about you. How could someone like you ever be interested in me? I can't bring anything into a life together. With anyone."

"But why do ya have to bring anythin' but yourself?"

I finally turned to look at him, my eyes filling with tears, "but it's supposed to be equal… isn't it?"

"Grayson," he cupped my cheek gently, "no. Ideally, it should be 50/50. But that's unrealistic. Sometimes it's 80/20. If all you can give is a smile and kind words, that's more than nothin'. And on those days, the days you're only at 20 percent, I have to do 120 percent. To make up for it. And you know what? I would never complain about that. Because it would be my job. To make up for that missin' little bit. Because I know you'd do the same for me. It's not about bringin' anythin'. It's about bein' here for each other. That's all. Growin' together. Bein' happy."

"But… I want to be able to support you too. To help…"

"Ya do. Ya truly do. But you're so caught up in what you're not doin' right now, ya fail to see how happy I am that you're here. You don't see me, Gray. Ya just feel guilty. I don't know how to release you of that. I don't want you to feel guilty. I'm takin' care of ya because I want you here. Well no… that ain't it. I just want you. It's been a long time since I wanted someone around. All I've ever wanted was this. A best friend. Someone to spend every day with. But ya don't see that. And I don't know how to make you understand," he sighed gently, getting to his feet, "I… I think I need some space. I need to think."

"But… Hunter. You asked me to talk, didn't you? That you like to talk things through. If you leave, that's not talking… it doesn't solve anything."

"I don't want to talk anymore. I… I shared too much. It's okay."

"Goddammit! You're so fucking stubborn. Sit down," I yelled and he turned around, staring at me in shock, "I'm sorry for yelling but for fucks sake don't just leave me out here sitting in the cold. You don't get to say everything you just did and then fucking leave."

"Where the hell did that come from?" He sat down again, "Are you always this aggressive?"

"No. But you made me mad. That's so disrespectful. I understand needing your space, but not giving me my turn to share how I feel? That's not okay with me. I'm guessing you're embarrassed. Or worried I can't return those ideas. You're wrong though. I'm interested in you, Hunter. But it hasn't been long enough for us to decide if we will be good in a relationship. If we can build a life together. That's going to take time. I want… to see you. For who you are. Not just these little sides you show me. Why do you think I watch you when you work? It's the time I get to see the real you. The dedicated, powerful man you are. I love watching you read at night. I made a promise to Judah. That even if you're attracted to me right now, we'd wait until I was healed to have this conversation. We're breaking that but that's okay. I want to create a real bond with you. It's important to me that at the very least you become the best friend I have in this world. The truest person in my life. You can't hide things from me and I won't from you. Give me that, and I will never leave your side. I'll let go of my guilt, feeling so dependent on you, and just accept it as you showing me you care. Because it's clear that you do. For whatever reason, you give a shit about me. You didn't have to."

"Grayson…"

"Hush now. Let me finish. I loved the way your lips felt on my cheek. That was the first time someone's done that with a romantic intention, not familial. It was the best feeling I've had. I wouldn’t mind those little kisses," I ran my hand down his arm and laced our fingers together, "holding hands. But that's it for a while. I need to feel stable, healthy. I need to give back to the home, and the farm before anything else happens. I suppose I'd like to ask if you want to try dating me. Not boyfriends suddenly. But… these special moments can be dates. We don't have to go to fancy places, I don't want that. But dinners with candlelight. Hikes. All that can be dates. A little more romance is needed but I can figure out how to do that. We can get to know each other really well, and decide if we want to take the next step to be boyfriends. If you want."

"You… huh?"

I turned to look at him and his entire face had gone red, making me giggle, "You're hopeless," carefully getting onto my knees, I softly pressed a kiss to his cheek, his beard tickling my chin, "would you like to date me?"

"I…"

"Did I short-circuit your brain?"

"Yes."

"I swear Hunter," laughing, I hugged him around the neck, nuzzling his cheek with my nose, "I'm sorry I yelled at you."

"I'm sorry I started to leave. I thought you were goin' to tell me you weren't interested in me. Um… yes. I'd like that. To date each other. But, ya gotta understand one of my love languages is gift giving. Like little things. It makes me happy to see your face light up. Your eyes are beautiful. They sparkle like jasper gemstones in the right light. That's what I've been tryin' to tell ya for days now. They draw me in. Make me nervous."

"Would it be easier for you if I close my eyes?" I laughed softly, my arms still around his neck.

He wrapped his arms around me and carefully shifted me until I was sitting in his lap, facing the fire. He pulled the blanket over us and rested his chin on my shoulder, "don't close them. But I can speak my mind easier if I ain't lookin' at ya. I don't feel as nervous. I want to learn who you are Gray. When you're healthy. You're so much better than ya were when ya came here. But I know you're not fully better. We have to get you through the physical pain and then the mental. Ya haven't really processed bein' attacked and that worries me. I hover, fuss over ya because ya seem to be so acceptin' of the fact this happened."

"I was waiting for it," I started gently running my fingers along his arm, "I'm tiny, Hunter. It was a matter of time. I've had people steal from me so many times. My first backpack that had all my clothes. Then my entire car that had all of my stuff. Now, my newest bag, my blankets, and coats. Whatever happened to the clothes I was taken to the hospital in?"

"They were ruined," he sighed, nuzzling my shoulder, "soaked in blood. I took your shoes off because I needed to check and see if you were bleedin' anywhere else I hadn't noticed. But your thigh was my main concern. I'm so fuckin' glad I got there in time."

"Me too. How was my wallet okay?"

"You'd tucked it into a sock. They never checked there."

"Ah, that's right. An older guy I saw once in a while taught me that. Keep valuables in your socks if you can. They took my knife. I bet that's what they used."

"Gray… it scares me that you're so okay with this…"

"I was ready to die. I accepted it. I had nothing left, Hunter. No reason to live. I'd lost everything. But your dad told me something and it's helped. He told me I have purpose. That I lived because I was supposed to. Even if that purpose is just spending my days helping you here on the farm, giving you that companionship you've longed for. That still counts. If all I do for the rest of my life is help you out as the best farm hand I can be, and help take care of Hazel's babies… then that's a hell of a good life. You were right. You found me because you were the one who was supposed to."

Hunter sniffled and buried his forehead into my shoulder, his warm tears soaking my sweater and I reached back, rubbing the nape of his neck.

"I don't want to die," I whispered, "I just accepted that it would happen sooner rather than later. I'm not going to leave you alone in the world. You are too good of a man to spend the rest of your life alone. I want to be worthy of you. Let me show you the real Grayson okay? Be patient."

"I am," he pressed a gentle kiss to my shoulder, "I'll wait for you. As long as ya need me to."

"Not too long," I turned my head and pressed a soft kiss to his temple, "you won't have to wait forever."

"I believe you."

We sat there quietly, Hunter holding me close as we watched the fire flicker, the stars glittering high in the sky. It started to grow cold, even for Hunter, and he sent me inside so that I could rest as he cleaned up and put the fire out.

I cuddled into the couch, the dogs on the floor below me, and Hunter finally came in, laying one of the blankets over me before coming over and lifting my head, laying it in his lap.

After turning on a movie, Hunter began to play with my hair and I laid my arm over his leg, my eyes closed.

"Goodnight," he chuckled, bending down and kissing my cheek, "sleep well," he whispered against my skin.

Goodnight.

I'm so glad you found me.