Benjamin

A small wolf is running in the woods.

Suddenly, it's surrounded by other bigger wolves with nowhere to run, no one to turn to.

Frightened, it whines and submits to the larger wolves, hoping to escape their wrath. And while they bare their teeth at it threateningly, the small wolf cowers and whimpers.

One of the larger wolves takes a step towards it, salivating already at the small, easy prey. It takes a swing at it, hitting his fur.

The other wolves see this as a sign to attack and darted at the small wolf, biting its body as if it was a deer.

Bloodied, bruised and whining, the small wolf knows it's about to die. There's nothing it can do to prevent it.

It's just waiting for the final blow to be given by the apparent leader. It sees a large tooth approaching its neck, a vision of hell.

I woke up from yet another nightmare.

Tears are escaping my eyes as if I just witnessed my mate being brutally murdered. The mate I'm yet to meet.

I can't stop the tears from flowing. I feel a desperation pouring out of me, as if my own life was in danger.

Well, in some ways, it is.

All I know is that it's not looking good.

Since my birthday last month, I've been scrambling to get by. I have scoured everywhere I could think of to find my mate.

Even among the human population. You name it, I went over there. Aside from looking for him at the state prison, I've searched it all.

My father has sent me throughout the State on short trips to allied packs, hoping that I'd find him somewhere else.

In just a few weeks, I traveled more than the last two years combined. It's good to strengthen our alliance and all, but I want my mate.

There's only one thing worse than having these nightmares where my mate dies. Not knowing who he is.

This is the true nightmare.

The despair over not knowing is consuming me with each passing day as if a cruel truth was yet to be revealed to me.

Also, there's the pity stares I get from every pack member as I walk by. Especially at school, which is where I spend most of my time.

But not only there, at the training center warriors keep pitying me whenever I enter like I have some sort of scarlet letter stamped all over my face.

I'm not the only unmated werewolf in town, not by a long shot. But no one expected ME to not find my mate.

It's not like this town lacks wolves to choose from. We have the second largest pack in the entire country.

Come on, Goddess! Your move.

"Have you been crying, sweetie?" - Mom asked me as soon as I sat down for breakfast, worriedly.

"I just had a bad dream, that's all." - I replied in a dismissive tone. At this point, I need not say anything else.

"My Goddess, this is torture! What the hell!" - Dad exclaimed, clearly bothered by this.

"It's fine, dad. There's literally nothing I can do about it. I don't even know who I am supposed to protect." - I told him in a defeated tone.

"I'm so sorry, Ben. You don't deserve this. You should be trying to complete the bond by now, not still trying to discover who your mate is." - Sasha comforted me and I smiled at her choice of words.

"Thanks, little sister." - I smiled weakly at her.

She's not wrong there, that's what I should be doing at this point. It's been almost 3 weeks since my birthday. Come on...

"Stay strong, son. Your mate will turn up when you least expect it." - Dad tried to cheer me up. I can't help but laugh at his words.

"There's nothing else I expect at this point, dad. It's what I want the most." - I told him, trying to sound optimistic.

Mom and dad hugged me before I left the table. I grabbed my bag and got into my car with Sasha heading to school.

Another week of people pitying me. Just great.

Funny, sometimes I fantasize about being human and not having to deal with any of this. Maybe then, I'd be happy with Teddy by my side.

For the past weeks, he has been my rock throughout this whole ordeal. Holding my hand to give me encouragement or hugging me when I need to cry about it.

Honestly, he's the only good thing to come out of it, so supportive of me and my needs. He never complained about my brooding mood, asked me to let it go or whatever.

He has simply been there for me and I couldn't be happier that he's in my life.

Of course, Lex is supporting me as well but I expected nothing different from him. Even if he's so busy getting together with his rogue, however, that only happens in the late afternoon.

"Good morning, bitch. How are you doing?" - Lex greeted me with his signature bitchy attitude.

"Aside from being plagued by nightmares where my mate dies, I'm fabulous." - I replied in a dry tone.

Lex grimaced at this, then he hugged me for a moment.

"It'll be alright. I'm sure you're just processing the trauma because of your brother." - He spoke in an uplifting tone.

"Sure. Whatever. Anyway, what's the tea?" - I asked him, not wanting to dwell on this anymore.

"Lisa showed a picture of Christian to some of the girls and now everyone wants to meet him." - He informed me, giggling.

"Wow. Was he in a speedo?" - I questioned him, intrigued.

"No, he wasn't. Not even shirtless, but I guess we have some thirsty hoes in this school." - He snickered as we walked towards the classroom.

I wholeheartedly laughed at this.

"We do, starting with you." - I provoked him, though he doesn't deny the title. He laughed at this.

I greet my classmates as we walk inside, including Teddy who I kiss on the lips. He smiles at my sight and it always warms my heart.

"Lisa, come on. When are you bringing him here for us to meet?" - A female student asked her, pouting.

"Never. He can't come here. His family is nomadic as I've already told you." - She rebuked, regretting her decision of showing his picture.

"That doesn't mean he can't come into town. If he's spending the winter here, he can totally visit us. I mean, you." - She insisted, practically drooling at the possibility.

"I'm sorry, Mena. I'll ask, but don't get your hopes up. His parents are really strict." - Lisa tried to throw her a bone so she would stop insisting. I giggled at this.

"All this and they haven't seen him in a bathing suit. The kid looks like a model." - I commented, getting the girls all riled up.

"Oh my goodness, Ben! Shut up!" - Lisa reprimanded, glaring at me from her seat. I gulped awkwardly. Lex laughed at us.

"See Lex, be glad no one cares about your hot latin boy. Especially one who's undated." - I teased him. I couldn't say 'unmated' because of the humans present.

Lex practically fulminated me with his death stare.

"What's undated? Do you mean he never dated anyone before?" - Mena asked in a curious tone. Of course she's human.

"Yes, but now he's dating ME." - Lex asserted with conviction and a 'back off, bitch' look.

Of course, the wolves present got the reference. And it peaked their interest.

"Wait, you're seeing an 18 year old who's undated?" - Evan inquired with curious eyes.

"Thanks, Ben. Thank you very much!" - Lex glared at me. Oh boy.

"Bitch, relax. Do you think high and mighty Evan is gonna want anything to do with nomads? I doubt he even stepped foot in the woods." - I dismissed, receiving a death stare from him.

"Maybe if he shows me a picture." - He teased Lex with a mischievous grin.

"Dream on, bitch! Go back to sucking off jocks on the DL." - Lex snapped at him. At this, people broke out in laughter at the exchange.

"That's your thing, Lex. Not mine. I wasn't the one being carried out of Teddy's party before I made a fool of myself with two football players." - Evan jabbed at him and we all gasped at this. Damn! He wasn't even at the party, how does he know?

Lex had to put on his sunglasses to conceal his eyes shining in rage right now.

"OK, you made your point, Evan. Leave him alone, please." - I asked though my tone broke no argument. Fortunately, the teacher entered and started the class.

Damn, that was awkward. Yes, both the football players in question are in the same class. We're all seniors, so our classes overlap a lot of times.

After this heated morning, classes went by like usual. Though the girls are not giving up on meeting Christian, I think.

And now Lex may have some competition for Tristan. And I'm not talking about the omega back at rogue camp.

After school, I take my frustrations training with the warriors. If there's one silver lining in this compulsory training, it is that I can take all my pent up frustrations and apply over there.

I'm showering at the locker room when my head gets invaded by Lex mind linking me.

"I need you to come to the waterfalls."

"What? When? Why?" - I'm baffled at this surprise summon.

"Now, Ben. I need you to come right away." - He insisted in a stern tone.

"Why? Did something happen? Are you alright?" - I asked him, worriedly.

"I'll explain it when you get here. Hurry!"

What the fuck! Why would he summon me to the waterfalls?

From his tone in the mind link, I can tell it's something serious otherwise he wouldn't bother me.

I guess there's no choice to be made, I need to find out what it is that he wants. So I hushed out of the shower, threw on some clean clothes and drove to the outskirts of town.

There's a trail to walk towards the waterfalls. Everybody who lives here knows about it. It's the only way to go except if you're coming through the woods.

Because it's a natural resource, the path is cleared and the walk is without danger. But once you get there, all bets are off.

The waterfall is outside of our territory, though patrols tend to come nearby for a refreshment on hot days.

As I walk the long mile, I'm thinking to myself what could possibly have prompted Lex to make me come here?

He knows my routine. He knows I'm tired and hungry at this hour and all I want is dinner and bed. Yet here I am, doing more exercise.

Someone better be dying or Lex will be once I'm through with him, I promise you that.

"Oh my Goddess! Ali, your eyes!" - I could hear Christian's voice as I approached the waterfall.

The walk all the way to the river passes through it first before we can reach the calm water.

My wolf starts howling inside my chest, going haywire at the proximity to our...

"Oh my Goddess!" - Ali's voice echoed through the open space.

That son of a bitch! How did he find out? How the hell does he know who my mate is that I didn't.

OK, Lex. Now I know why you summoned me here. Game. Set. Match.

Once I'm in sight, Christian, Tristan, Lex and Lisa all look at my glowing eyes mesmerized.

However, no one looked more shocked by this than a shining Alistair.

"I knew it!" - Lex yelled, feeling happy with himself. This distracted us for a moment, until I arrived closer to all of them, at the edge of the river shore.

"MATE!" - I declared in a deep, husky tone.

My eyes shine brighter than ever before and so has Alistair's. He stares at me with a mixture of confusion and repulsion.

"MATE!" - He repeated back to me, as if his wolf compelled him to. Which it did, same as mine.

"I can't believe this!" - Tristan exclaimed, gobsmacked. All of them are staring at us almost in disbelief.

"Why? Why would I be mated to you? You hate rogues!" - Alistair protested, once his eyes stopped shining.

"I have no idea." - I replied, too dumbfounded to enunciate anything else. I stare deep into his eyes, completely puzzled at how the hell he's my mate.

"Guys, we need to go home. It's getting late." - Alistair declared, looking at his friends.

"What?" - I gasped in shock.

"It's getting late. We need to head back to camp." - He reiterated in a serious tone.

"Wait, aren't you gonna say anything? You're my mate!" - I'm genuinely at a loss here.

"No. It doesn't change anything. I still need to go back." - He replied in a matter of fact tone and this is getting away from me fast.

"Right. Sure. But can't we talk first? I barely know your name..." - I proposed in a pleading tone.

"No, we can't. I need to go home now." - He isn't backing down, apparently. This boggles my mind.

"We can stay behind if you need some time with your mate, Ali." - Christian offered with a sweet smile.

"He's not my mate! There must have been some sort of error." - Ali is in denial.

"Are you joking? I AM your mate! There's no error except for you trying to escape me like I'm your enemy." - I defended, seriously pissed off at his attitude.

"Look, I'm sure you're a nice boy... underneath it all." - He started with a patronizing tone.

"But I don't want you as my mate. I never did. That's it." - He said with a disappointed expression.

"Wait, are you rejecting me?" - I'm so mad right now that I almost can't pronounce the words.

He looks at me silently for a moment.

"Yes! I don't want you as my mate." - He confirmed and my heart sank.

I dropped onto the ground, devastated. Lex hushes to comfort me as despair takes over my entire being.

He unceremoniously grabbed his buckets, filled them and started walking away. His friends hurry to do the same and catch up with him. All baffled at the turn of events.

Lisa joins in the hug, trying to comfort me.

Honestly, this is the worst possible outcome for me. At least when I hadn't discovered my mate I had hope. Now I have nothing.

Just a little while ago, my eyes were shining and it was the happiest of days. Now, it's the saddest.

All I had was a sparkle of hope, a little light guiding my days in anticipation and expectation.

I was so looking forward to finding my mate. This is supposed to be the happiest day of my life. Now what?

Well, if he thinks he's getting rid of me that easily, he'll have another thing coming!

I didn't survive all this way, navigated many minefields, overcame bullying and homophobia to stop now.

I can't let my father down. I refuse to.

He'll just have to reconsider. Whatever it takes. Even if I have to beg, borrow or steal.

This little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine.

And no one will stand in my way. Not even my rogue mate.

A|N: In The Refugee's Mate there's also a short lived mate rejection, but that was a panicked decision made hastily. This is deliberate. This is purposeful. This will hurt a lot more.

Buckle up people, you ain't seen nothing yet!

OFF: I do most of my writing outside of my house, in my phone, on the subway or off time at work. I wrote a chapter inspired by the song 'Baby, it's cold outside' but for some reason when I checked back online almost the entire chapter hadn't been saved and now I have to write almost the whole thing again. This is so frustrating! I really hated this, but there's no record of the words anywhere on wattpad. Man, it's hard out here for an amateur writer!

Anyway, the next chapter is unbelievable!

PS: Now that's a picture! My favorite of Ben's.

Love,

Léo.