I look at the swarm. I'm reminded of the book, "Millions of Cats," that I read as a child. I certainly don't want a repeat of that here today! There's an odd thing about this swarm, though...they're clearly cats, or at least cat-like, judging from the faces and ears, but they're also not your average felinus domesticus. Most of them are standing on two feet, and their body is more humanoid. Was my property invaded by fursuiters? If so, they're wearing the most realistic costumes I've ever seen. 

"Um, human? What are you looking at?"

I snap my attention back to the slightly more normal-looking cat addressing me. "Sorry, I was just admiring those with you. I believe there has been a misunderstanding here. Yes, I have a kitten in my house. However, I had no foul intentions; I've been caring for her as well as I can. She seems to really enjoy the food and attention I've been showing her, judging from how she hasn't once tried running out my front door when I leave my house."

The cat looks relieved. "Oh, thank goodness, we found a nice one!" She turns to the others and meows something I don't understand. The others become more relaxed. Then she turns back to me. "Can you ask her to come out here?"

I think for a couple seconds. "That sounds okay to me, but I just have to ask first, how do you think she ended up with me? When I found her, she was a mess. She was soaking wet, shivering, and looked like she hadn't eaten since being weaned."

The cat mom replies without hesitation. "I'm unsure, but I'll know after she tells me. Then I'll tell you."

I nod, and then I go inside to retrieve her. Funnily enough, she was sitting on the back of my couch, watching everything. As I walk inside, she hops down, then walks past me to her mom. I just turn around and follow. 

As she walks back to her mom, my, or rather, the, kitten talks in a series of clicks, purrs, and soft mewls. Cat mom talks to her in the same way. After a minute of this, cat mom looks at me. 

"Thank you for your kindness. Apparently it's as I thought. On the day she was weaned, we had a celebration for it. Part of our tradition is that we send newly weaned kittens on a hunt. Originally, we would just send them out into the wild, but these days we just set up a fenced area with a couple mice and let our little ones have an easy victory. Well, little miss prissy here decided that wasn't good enough and decided to have her own hunt her own way, more the traditional way. As for why she looked like she hadn't eaten in days, she just hadn't. Like I said, we normally just have a fenced in area with an easy victory, so we don't bother training our young ones to chase. So, after she left us, she realized she didn't know how to hunt. So she started trying, only to make a fool out of herself in front of every mouse in 5 city blocks. She wasn't able to catch anything. As the days went by, she got farther away from home, and she realized she didn't know her way back. As for how she was soaking wet when you found her, she got too close to a curb and got soaked by a bus hitting a giant puddle. Then you found her, and here we are."

I'm just baffled by all this, and I ask for a minute to process all that information. Meanwhile, "Little Miss Prissy" is sitting next to her mother, looking embarrassed and slightly ashamed. 

Cat mom continues after I say that I understand. "She really appreciates the training you've been giving her with the laser pointer; she assumed you were trying to teach her how to hunt. She says she thinks she's finally ready to make a catch."

I nod and look at the kitten. "I wish you the best." Then I look at cat mom. "I'm curious about a couple things. Does she also know how to speak my language? And, I noticed some of your "people" over there; what's up with that?"

Cat mom sighs. "She can understand you, but it's usually not until adulthood that we can speak human languages. As for my servants over there, let's just not get into that."

"But,"

"Please, I'd rather not." Cat mom looks embarrassed now, too. Seriously, what's going on here?

"It's just that they're so cute!"

Cat mom is no longer looking embarrassed; now she's looking confused. "I thought you were asking about...um, how that happens, not just–"

"I also don't really care about how cat-people came into existence, although I'm guessing it's some were-cat kind of thing. No, what I'm more curious about is if any one of them is...well, available." (I add finger quotes as I say "available.")

Cat mom and Little Miss Prissy both say, "Huh?"

"I mean no offense, but you started this whole conversation by asking me what I want. Though I'm willing to just hand over 'Little Miss Prissy' (again, finger quotes) without hesitation, I think it would be amazing to have a cute catgirl girlfriend...or wife."

Cat mom goes from confused to shocked. "Wait a minute! You're not repulsed by them? Most of those in our kingdom strongly ridicule these of mine. It has only been in the past year that I've been able to stop other citizens from harassing them!"

It's my turn to be shocked. "Are you kidding? There are thousands upon thousands of humans who would love to be with a cute catgirl. It's a whole THING!"

There is a brief pause in the conversation while everyone processes what was just said. I'm thinking, "Cat kingdom citizens who would look down on cute catgirls? Lemme attem!" Meanwhile, cat mom is thinking, "There are humans who would actually accept were-cats? Thank goodness!"

Cat mom and I finally actually look at each other, and she says, "I'm glad you're willing to just turn over my daughter to me. And if you take in one of my citizens who has been harassed, I would be most appreciative. I think we can make a deal, as long as one of my servants is willing to have you."

Cat mom and I look over at the were-cats. The girls are all purring. Now there's a new problem: Which one do I choose?