“I need your license card buddy,” shouted the police officer. If my driver’s license didn’t expire, I would have complied. Maybe the officer and I could have been friends lounging in a dimly lit basement, telling long tales of our everyday lives, sipping an unholy combination of pizza and cake. But today would not be that day. Not with the piercing glare he gave me. 

I was crouching in my seat, the officer getting impatient. Now when I was crouching, I found lots of…peculiar stuff under it. Stuff like a Gamechild console (which I never had), a big, broken bird egg (also never had that), and other strange oddities. Eventually I found a big square hole and decided to lean closer to it.

I should not have done that.

Because I was pulled down by gravity’s force, pulled down to the stairs. I was warned my whole life about falling down the stairs. Heck, I never even saw any stairs until now, but it was awful. But not as awful as what happened next…

The rice was hypnotizing me. I had to resist…but I couldn’t resist. I had to, but I can’t. Must. No. Yes. Pineapple.

  I don’t remember what happened next. But the police officer was asking for my license. And I had it, unexpired.