Sunday: December 5th, 2015

When I descended the stairs to the living room on the morning of the fifth day of Christmas, I was surprised to find only Clare and Amelia on the bottom floor.

"Where's my dad and Hunter?" I asked. I hadn't seen dad since our fight last night. Clare had waited up for me, though dad and the kids had gone to bed. When I got home, my makeup was smeared from my tears, which Clare had clearly seen as I removed my jacket and shoes. But I had quickly bid her goodnight and hurried up to the bathroom to remove my makeup before slipping into bed.

"The boys have popped out to see Chris's family for the day," she replied.

Great... So Hunter is worth showing off to my grandparents, but not me. 

"We were all going to go, but I asked if us girls could have some bonding time," she then said, almost as if reading my thoughts. Clare and Amelia were sitting on the ground, playing with her ponies, Clare's hazel eyes still expectantly looking at me. "So what do you say?" she then said.

"Say about what?"

"Spending a bit of time with me and Amelia."

"Wait... you mean, the three of us?" I asked, surprised.

Nodding, she said, "Unless you of course don't identify as a girl? If so, I'm very sorry—"

The panicked look in her eyes had me disrupting her. "No, of course I do. I just... thought you meant you and your daughter."

"Zara... I know so many stories paint step-mothers as the evil villain out to get the step-daughter... But to me, you're no different than Amelia or Hunter. I know we don't have much of a relationship yet, but I do consider you my child. We're family now." There was a nervous look to her eyes as she said that, as though she feared I too might reject her. And in that moment I realised that perhaps she was also nervous about how to navigate our relationship.

I didn't know what to say back though. The part of me that felt guilty towards mum if I accepted this woman told me to say I didn't want such a relationship before storming back up to my room. But her youth and fragility permeated through the room, begging me to offer her at least some kindness—a chance to show me whatever she intended. So I asked, "What did you have in mind?"

Grinning, she said, "If you'll help me bring it all up from the basement, I was thinking we could decorate the house for Christmas."

∘◦ ❈ ◦∘

Amelia didn't last long with the decorations. After dragging up the Christmas tree (we weren't using a real one with little kids present in the house), decorations, and other ornaments, she helped place a couple of baubles on the lower branch then returned to her ponies.

Nonetheless, the Christmas tree was erected and the rest of the house redecorated with Santas, reindeer, and other ridiculous festive items within a couple of hours.

Amelia had fallen asleep on the couch in that time, so, once we were done, Clare scooped her up and brought her upstairs to her bed.

Once she had returned to the living room with me, she smiled and said, "How about some lunch?"

After assembling some sandwiches, we took a seat at the dining table, eating somewhat in silence. That is, until she ruined it.

"I don't mean to pry, but if you need someone to talk to about whatever upset you last night, know I am here, Zara," she said to me, eyes still focussed on her lunch like she was trying to be nonchalant.

"Thanks," I mumbled, "But I'm fine."

"It's just... you still don't seem quite fine... even today. Did things with your friend not go well?"

I shook my head, not meeting her gaze that I knew was already on me. "I'll get over it in a couple of days though when I forget he existed."

Then she set her sandwich down. "Maybe you need a distraction."

I looked up as she got up from the table, walking into the hallway. I heard a bit of shuffling in drawers until she returned, a paper enclosed in her hand.

"I was handed this at work the other day," she said as she sat down, sliding it across the table to me. "I don't know why they thought I would do it considering I have two children and no time for any competition. But after I looked at it again, I thought maybe you'd be interested?"

I wanted to feign disinterest, but when I noticed the £3000 clearly noted at the top of the page, I pulled the flyer closer.

"Do you think they'd let me enter?" I asked her. "Even though I don't live here?"

Shrugging, Clare responded, "You have a British accent and you can list this as your address. What will they know about whether you're actually a resident? You can always ask, too, if you're unsure. Anyway, considering we aren't on holidays until the 20th, I figured it might give you something to do until then. A good distraction. Maybe make some new friends through it?"

I looked up at her, deadpanning, and replied, "Does anyone make friends when in a competitive spirit?"

Chuckling, she said, "Probably not. But we can always try!" As she grabbed my plate and continued to bustle in the kitchen, washing up the mess we made for lunch, I continued to glance at the flyer, imagining doing it.

9am to 5pm every day... I would have a full schedule of distractions. And I could potentially win money.

It says I would solve riddles. I could do riddles, right? And even if I only came second, I'd be more than happy with £500.

When I glanced over at Clare, I realised she had a satisfied smile across her face. She was glad she had helped me. Proud she had done something for me... And she deserved that smugness, because she had certainly distracted me from Jasper for the moment.

But as I smiled back at her while she hummed and danced, hands busy washing the dishes, that pang of guilt echoed within me once more.

It wasn't right to like her... Because if I accept her, aren't I betraying my mum?

∘◦ ❈ ◦∘

Jojo: How was the party?

Ria: Yes! Tell us about the party.

The messages began to ping through as the day started back home while I sat in bed, watching Netflix on my laptop. I had sent the girls a message before I had taken off last night but didn't tell them what happened when I had gotten home.

Me: Don't ask.

Jojo: Was Mr Handsome a jerk?

Me: Yes. I don't even know why he did it...

Ria: Did what?

Me: He leaned for what I thought was the intent to kiss me... then laughed in my face for closing my eyes.

Jojo: WHAT?

Ria: Double what?

Jojo: *searches cost of sending rocks overseas*

Me: No need for the rocks. I won't see him again, so it's fine. I just don't understand why... He was really weird when I first saw him again the other day. It was almost as if he was mad and he grumbled about me not remembering something I did the last time I saw him. But if I can't remember it, surely it wasn't too bad, right?

Ria: Why don't you call him? Demand to know what you did for him to think he could treat you like that?

Me: I don't want to give him the satisfaction that he bothered me.

Jojo: That's fair.

Me: I figure if I just pretend he never existed and show no further attention, then at least I win at something. Even if I feel like a fool being rejected by two guys in one week.

Jojo: They're the fools, Zazu.

Suddenly she sent through a gif of Scar saying he's 'surrounded by idiots'.

Jojo: That's you. Surrounded by idiots.

Ria: And you're one of those idiots, right?

Jojo: ... you're supposed to love me.

Ria: I do. But that doesn't mean I have to be nice.

Jojo: Yes it does. It's in the relationship handbook.

Ria: Sorry. Don't have that one.

Jojo: I'll loan you mine.

Interrupting their conversation, I sent a picture of the flyer Clare had given me today.

Jojo: Ooo! Money!

Me: Should I do it?

Jojo: For sure. And you can text us the riddles the moment you get them and we can help you solve them ;)

Me: That's a good idea...

Jojo: I'm full of those.

Ria: You really aren't...

Jojo: I will deliver you that relationship handbook today. Priority.

Ria: Can you bring Maccas on the way?

Jojo: Okay... what do you want?

Me: Back to my competition, guys. So you really think I should do it?

Ria: It can't hurt, right? And 3000... that's like over 5000 in Australian dollars, right?

Me: Yup.

Jojo: OH YOU COULD GET A CAR.

Jojo: THEN DRIVE IT PAST ROWAN'S.

Jojo: AND DELIVER ENDLESS ROCKS TO HIS HOUSE.

Ria: The rock joke is getting old.

Jojo: It never gets old.

Me: A car would be nice... No one can ever dump me for not having one.

Ria: I thought you said that wasn't the real reason.

Me: It's not... but it was the one he wanted to give me. Feel like it would really be an 'in your face' thing if I just became the person he wished I was when I got back.

Jojo: Ooo, make him see what he lost. Yas. Here for it.

Me: Anyway, I have to go to bed now. Thanks for the chat guys!

Ria: Let us know when you've entered!

Me: Will do!

Jojo: Sleep well, Zazu!

Ria: Sleep well, Zar!

Me: Have a good day, guys.