Ha-Rin unclasped her seatbelt and gave a heaving sigh. “So, are you going to talk about how upset you and Hrafn are right now or are we just going to stew here like rice cakes?”

“What?” Haneul ran a hand through his hair, trying to figure out how to dodge her questioning and to figure out the rice-cake analogy.

She parked the van in the designated spot down the road and killed the engine. After she gave him a quick lookover that was definitely borderline judgemental, she leaned back and stared out the window. “He was real worried about you, y’know.”

“He has a funny way of showing it.” Haneul sunk his face into his hands. “He likes me Ha-Rin.”

“No shit.”

“He likes me and yet he doesn’t want me.” He felt his lip twist horribly and his gut clench. This was not what he wanted to think about during their little excursion away from the business world.

Ha-Rin’s concern grew on her face, visible and sour like she had swallowed something tart. 

That resulted in Haneul spending the next fifteen minutes or so explaining the argument from that morning. It felt as though their conversation was both years ago and just a minute ago. By the time he finished, he wondered if he was fooling himself. Was Hrafn just misunderstanding a foreign sensation from an equally foreign being as affection?

“Christ, you both are adults, act like it.” Ha-Rin groaned, pressing her forehead against the steering wheel. “Something like this isn’t rocket science. And he would know about that!”

“You’re siding with him?” Haneul had considered that he was in the wrong by trying to push.

“I’m not siding with either of you! You’re both being idiots. Think about it. He’s an unimaginable distance away from his home and he has to worry about if you and he are going to be skewered in the middle of the night. On top of that, the only creature he’s formed an inseparable bond with had a psychotic breakdown last night. He’s clearly worried, Haneul. Worried that if he pushes you any further than you’ve already been, he’ll break you.”

“But that won’t happen.” Haneul said firmly. “I want this. He isn’t pushing anything. I won’t break.”

“He doesn’t know that,” Ha-Rin exhaled with exasperation. “He doesn't have the however-many plus years that me or Chief Seong has. He’s known you for a little less than half a year. What if his emotions or his situation causes you to snap again?”

“That’s…” he paused and choked on his tongue for a moment. “That wasn’t my fault…”

“Something like that isn’t your fault,” she assured him with a gentler look. “But I’m sure he’s thinking that the last thing you need is an alien falling in love with you. That on its own is a whole package to unbox. But then you have his whole other problem—there are others of his race actively trying to kill him.”

He hesitated. “I made things worse by pulling away.”

“It certainly didn’t help.”

“I just…didn’t know what to think. He’s always thinking of his planet and his people. With how much devotion he has to his world, it’s frustrating to think there are those who want to physically put a stop to that care. All because it doesn’t match with their agendas. And for all of my influence and reach here, I can’t do anything for him in this situation…”

He wondered if things were ruined. Resting his head against the window, Haneul watched the silhouettes of waves disappear beneath the line of the shore overhang. Every time they got closer to the outcropping, they disappeared beneath the earth, petering out before they could form the tide. Something powerful and concrete like the ocean could be so fragile and fleeting in the human mind. One moment it existed all at once, a powerful span of dark blue, before it fizzled out into a tide crashing along a tide pool cove. Scattered and disconnected.

“I didn’t want to ruin what we had,” he sighed. “But I’m so tired of feeling like I can’t go anywhere, that I can’t do anything. Ever since he fell on top of my car, decision after decision had nothing to do with what was best for my family or the company. It has all been for him.”

“So you exchanged one obligation for another.” Ha-Rin drummed her fingers against the steering wheel. “Trading one lifelong oath for another is not the way to go.”

“But it’s not an obligation.”

For the first time that day, he smiled genuinely. He stared at his hands, the ghost of a pair far larger and bony encircling his wrists—clasping over his fingers. Those hands held him steady. 

“It’s not an obligation,” Haneul said. “I could have left him there to die or worse be picked up by someone else. Everything has been because I wanted it. From our DIY splints…to even now wanting to know how to make this work.” He met her gaze. In the future, he would have to move forward for his family and his company. But for now, in this moment, he would take his steps towards Hrafn for however long he could.

“Well then! Time to reel in a bird.” Ha-Rin kicked her door open, hopping out of the car and opening the back passenger doors to grab the cooler. “Get it? Cause we’re at the beach and there’s fish?” 

“I’m not trying to seduce him, Ha-Rin.” Haneul rolled his eyes but all the same removed his tie and unbuttoned the top clasp of his shirt.

She shrugged. “He doesn’t know that. Besides, he’s a bird. If he’s anything like Earth’s avian species, then that means a potential mate has to show they’re interested first before he can decide if this is what he wants. This is all a stupid dance you’re doing around one another. Get with the program.”

He chuckled lightly, wondering if Hrafn’s people did mating rituals the way birds of Earth did. The absurd image of Hrafn dancing around made him snort softly. After a moment, he supposed he might eventually find out.

Even if he refuses again, and pushes me further away, I’ll have tried. Haneul stared at himself in the rearview mirror, the reflection’s eyes were vibrant and alive. I’ll have tried for myself. 

With one last motivational pep-talk to himself, he left the car and followed Ha-Rin to their old beach campout. From this distance, he could make out the tufts of Hrafn’s ears and his looming figure straight ahead. Never in a thousand years had Haneul thought he’d be taking his steps towards someone not even human. But even now, it was as natural as walking forward. He called out.