My heartrate spiked instantly, and my arms gripped the edges of her fingers, trying to pry them off of my body. She brought her other hand up and brushed the side of my head with the tip of her finger. She wasn’t trying to be rough, but even involuntarily she raked her fingers across my skin.

“Shhh… it’s okay. Don’t be scared,” she said as she hoisted me further in the air up to her face so she could better see me. I only now noticed that her hair was some kind of pale magenta and silver. “Aww you’re a cutie. I see why she likes having you around.”

My voice finally comes back to me. I look into her eyes and think of the one thing I want more than anything in the world.

“Put me down, Daisy,” I said firmly. “Put me down and bring me to Caroline.”

“Aww! You’re so sweet! Missing her, aren’t you?” I rolled my eyes at Daisy’s question as she whisked me away to the kitchen table and set me down. She set me down and fished out a few of the treats to give to me. I had to admit I was relieved to be using my own two legs again and instantly retreated to the opposite end of the table to distance myself from Daisy.

“I do miss her,” I said indignantly. “Which is why you need to bring me to her. I’m worried she’s not telling me everything about her procedures. We have the paperwork in the desk over there. If you have that on hand and smuggle me in, I coul…”

“Wow, you’re a talkative one, aren’t you?” smiled Daisy as she held out the treats, interrupting my directions. “You’ve got to be hungry. Come on. Not eating won’t do you any good.” I sighed and rubbed my tired eyes. I clasped my hands together and used them to point at her.

“Daisy, right? Please. I need you to listen to me. Caroline needs me, but I can’t get to the hospital on my own,” I said as slowly and calmly as I could. Daisy sighed and looked at the treats in her hand.

“Not hungry then. That’s okay. Still, I promised I would look after you. This whole thing has to be stressful. Let’s get you clean and into some fresh clothes. That’ll make you feel better,” decided Daisy.

“No, wait…” It was too late. Daisy already reached forward and had nearly grabbed me around the waist again, but I rolled out of the way behind the paper towel rack. “Aww! Don’t be shy. I told you I’m not going to hurt you. I’m here to help.”

Annoyance saturated my senses.

“If you were here to help, you’d find a way to take me to Caroline,” I replied.

“Caroline is in the hospital, so whining about it isn’t going to help. Come on Mikey,” coaxed Daisy. This variation of my name made my blood boil.

“It’s Michael,” I snapped. “Just Michael.”

“I’m sure you’ll feel better if you just take a second. Poor thing, being here all alone. Come on, Mikey. Get something to eat and get clean,” said Daisy.

I glared around the paper towel holder at Daisy and prepared to say something snarky when I felt her fingers wrap around me from behind. I tried to slip out from her grasp, but she got me this time.

She hoisted me into the air once again and walked the both of us to the bathroom sink. Before she shut the door behind us, she retrieved a small “care package” from her purse and began running warm water. I tried struggling at first, but it was pointless.

I had to be the slightest bit grateful that even if Daisy wasn’t listening that she was attempting to be gentle with her grip. She set me down on the countertop and checked the water before continuing to pull out different items including soaps and brushes.

I had to try again. She needed to hear me out.

“Daisy, Caroline is alone in the hospital right now. She has to go through treatments. I have to be there,” I explained. “We’re a te…”

“Caroline is fine. She’s in the hospital and they’re taking care of her. Come on, you can’t do anything to help her, but you can be fresh and clean, fed and rested for when she comes back. Now, it’s bath time,” stated Daisy.

My chest was getting tight. Everything was spiraling. Flashbacks crawled their way out of the depths of my memory to play before my eyes. Being forced under water to have what was essentially a toothbrush raked through my hair to “brush” it. Pokes and prods to make sure I was responsive.

My only saving grace was thinking about what Caroline taught me to do. Deep breath. What can I see? What can I hear? What can I smell? What can I feel? I latched onto the facts around me because it was what Caroline did to help herself.

I wished Caroline were here. She would know what to do. She could tell Daisy to stop and to listen, explain who we were and share her perspective of pets.

The peace the mental exercise brought is shattered when Daisy picks me up once again and lowers me into the sink under the faucet.

“Wai-” The water poured over my head and drenched the clothes on my body. It was only for a second, but it was a second too long where my entire body was submerged under the warm water.

Everything in me shut down. It had been so long since I had been treated like what I was – a pet – that my mind and body shut down. It felt like shock. I knew I needed to fight. I wanted to fight. I also wanted it to be over as quickly and painlessly as possible.

It was like I was back in conditioning once again. I needed to drop back and observe. The rules had changed, and I needed time to find a way around them. I wouldn’t let this break me, but that meant losing this battle for now.

All of this transpired in less than twenty seconds, and Daisy was just about to start her so-called “grooming” when her phone began to ring. She needed a hand to answer the phone, but she couldn’t leave me under the water.

“I’m sorry, I need to see who it is. Don’t you go anywhere,” said Daisy as she wrapped me in a towel and set me on the side of the sink. She pulled out her phone and her eyes widened immediately. She picked up the line and walked to the doorway to lean up against it.

I wasn’t trying to listen in, but Daisy wasn’t exactly subtle. Also, the one word that caught my attention made me latch onto the conversation, breaking the hypnotic shock my body fell under.

Caroline.

“Hey, Caroline. What’s up? Gosh, you sound awful. You okay?”

There was a pause as Caroline was most likely responding.

“Delaying treatment? Why?”

Another pause.

“Wait, you’re breaking up a little. They found a what?” asked Daisy.

My breath stopped dead in my chest. What? What did they find? What was going on? Was Caroline okay?

“Seriously? Now? I didn’t think they said surgery wasn’t going to be an opt… Yeah I’m at your place,” said Daisy, eyes flicking over to me. “Well, yeah, Mikey is doing fine. He hasn’t eaten anything and is being really talkative. I picked out a couple of things for him on my way here. I’ve even got this cute little outfit I think you’re gonna love. I’ve gotta say Caroline, you picked a cute one. I think he…”

Another moment of silence as Daisy’s brow furrows curiously.

“Well, yeah he’s here. I was giving him a bath. I thought it might calm him down and make him feel bet…”

Another pause. I actually caught a bit of what Caroline said, which was something along the lines of, “you’re what? He’s there listening? He doesn’t need to hear this second hand. Step away and I’ll call him back in a minute.” Everything felt tense around me. My ears were ringing as I heard Caroline coughing again.

Daisy, as predicted, stepped out of the bathroom at Caroline’s request and continued the conversation.

I was alone once again to wallow in these new revelations.

The tests came back that quickly?

Or was Caroline understating the severity of her sickness to keep me from worrying myself to death?

What were they talking about now?

Caroline sounded upset that Daisy was speaking so freely in front of me. Was that because she didn’t want to be caught in a lie? Or because she just found out the information for herself?

The most important question was whether or not Caroline was okay and if she was going to come home. Or was Daisy my new “owner”?

I lost it.

I was soaking wet, shivering under my tow0le. I was sick with worry, nausea churning my insides. At the same time, I was starving from not being well enough to eat. Most of all… Caroline.

Caroline was sick in the hospital. I knew I couldn’t do anything to help her medically, but I could still be there to support her. She was alone and not doing as well as she claimed earlier.

My body shook uncontrollably. Every part of me felt numb. Vision blurring, I saw tears falling from my eyes like some kind of out of body experience.

It was now, only now, that Daisy stepped rambling from the other room and had come back into the bathroom. She looked at me huddled under the towel shivering, grasping at its fibers that clung to my shoulders.

“Are… you crying?” she asked, arms lowering. The outfit she picked out for me was still in her hands, but she slowly put it down as she watched me slowly succumbing to the frustrating madness of the situation.

“Hey, it’s going to be okay,” she cooed as she approached.

“No, it’s not!” I shouted, ready to vent my frustration regardless of the consequences. If she was going to be my new owner, I was going to make myself the worst pain possible to rebel. “It’s not going to be okay!”

“Mikey, I know how you feel, but…”

“It’s Michael! My name is Michael,” I interjected. “Not Mike. Not Mikey. Not Micky. Just Michael. And don’t try the sympathy bit. You don’t know how I feel, so empathize away.” I sat there shaking, unwilling to look Daisy in the eye, while tears poured down my face. I tried choking them back in my chest, but that only exaggerated my shakes.

“You’re… taking this really hard…” said Daisy softly. Something in her tone was different, but I wasn’t ready to relent. I was just getting started.

“Of course I’m taking it hard! Caroline is my friend. She’s hurting and sick and all alone having to deal with doctors and needles and this sickness. The only reason I’m not there is because of some stupid human rules saying I can’t go,” I said, standing and letting the towel fall off of me. My soaking wet clothes felt like the burdening weight every other human put on me and talking about Caroline was like throwing those shackles aside.

Daisy said nothing. She just stood there, actually listening for the first time since she had arrived.

I intended to take full advantage of the situation.

“If I were human, I wouldn’t care where she was. I’d walk if that’s what it took to get to Caroline, but I can’t. I’m a pet. I have to sit and do what I’m told because that’s what is expected of me. Caroline knows the truth. She knows we’re more than that,” I ranted before running my fingers through my hair. It’s drying in clumps, which I know Caroline would tease me about.

Daisy’s voice drifted through the air.

“I… didn’t think…” I’ve already heard enough. I looked up into her eyes for the first time since I began my rant.

“Didn’t think what? That a pet, like me, could have such intense feelings? That we could have thoughts and dreams and opinions? You didn’t think we could come up with plans to get around those ridiculous human laws? That we were capable of forming emotional connections beyond that of a gerbil or dog?” I asked. “I’m not a doll, you know. I’m a person; at least Caroline sees me that way. So, stop treating me like one.”

I couldn’t look at her anymore. I turned around and folded my arms, gritting my teeth to keep my lip from trembling.

“You really care about her, don’t you?” asked Daisy. I can only nod over and over again.

“More than you know,” I muttered, knowing she couldn’t hear me.

“And… you’d do anything to see her? Even if you got in trouble?” asked Daisy. Again, I could only nod.

Daisy sounded like she was about to say something else, but the phone rings, making both of us jump out of our skin. Caroline retrieves the phone and sees it is the hospital. On the phone is none other than Caroline; and she was asking for me.

Caroline immediately apologized when she got on the phone, saying she wasn’t trying to keep anything from me and that she just found out some of the results from the tests they performed. She’s being taken into surgery later that night and wished more than anything that I could be there.

I tried to stay strong during our call, but she knows me better than the back of her hand and knows my voice is tense and shaking. What was more heart breaking was another round of coughs ended our call when a doctor informed her she needed to rest before the procedure later. The whole conversation, Daisy stood nearby listening to our conversation. I wanted privacy, but suspected Daisy wouldn’t listen even if I requested her to leave.

The moment the phone clicked off, I saw Daisy’s hand come back into view. Feeling defeated, I raised my arms slightly so they wouldn’t be pinned against my body. When no pressure came, I looked over to see Daisy’s had turned upright in an offering motion.

I looked back at her confused and was slightly taken aback by the tears brimming in her eyes.

“Come on,” she said quietly as she blinked away the glossy look in her eyes. “I’m sneaking you in. We’re going to go see Caroline and wait for her to get out of surgery.”

Stunned, I looked up into her eyes completely and utterly baffled.

“Why?” I asked. I didn’t necessarily care what her reasoning was, but my racing heart and curious mind couldn’t help but ask the question.

“Because,” she said quietly. “You’re not a doll.”