Chapter 10 Continued

I stood from the table abruptly, my fork clattering loudly against my plate and my napkin clenched in a tight fist as a flurry of emotion flared throughout my body at Corey's words. The entire table was staring at me as I stood there, breathing deeply and forcing yet another lump in my throat down.

"I..." 

My voice cracked as I tried desperately to force something, anything to come out. I felt the loose cannon of my emotions come to life, a strong blast of anger flaring up in me as I turned towards Corey.

"Do you... Do you even feel anything?!" I screamed out, releasing all of my anger in one fell swoop. "You're like some kind of black hole and ninety-nine percent of the time I don't even know if you like me! How do you expect me to make a decision like this when you don't even have fucking emotions?!"

My chest heaved as I stared down at Corey. I was so unbelievably angry in that moment that I didn't even notice the glint of recognition that flashed through his eyes, or the fact that the entire restaurant was now staring at me wide-eyed and confused. I simply threw my napkin down on the table, turned on my heel, and stormed my ass right out of that restaurant.

I took a deep breath of fresh air as soon as I exited the turning doors of the restaurant, bending over to grab my knees as I clenched my teeth together tightly. I had never fought this hard not to cry in my life, not even when my father beat me within an inch of it. This wasn't for just the mere fact that the tether was straining hard against my chest. 

No, this was a different kind of pain, one that settled deep into my bones, ripped through my muscles and tore my heart to shreds. A pain that made it hard to breathe, hard to comprehend, hard to do anything more than feel the gravity of the earth as it flung me around wildly on its axis, trying to find my direction in the sea of nothingness that I felt. 

I felt like a child again. 

Unsure. Afraid. But most of all, unworthy. 

I knew that it was wrong to yell at him. I knew that this whole entire situation was all my fault. Yet, deep down there was some truth to the words I'd screamed at him.

He was just so hard to read, I genuinely questioned if he ever felt anything.

A large pair of combat boots appeared in front of me and I squinted, forcing my eyes up to see who was in front of me. Tyrus stood tall, still chewing remnants of what I assumed to be pasta as he dangled his car keys from a finger.  

"Let's go." 

I didn't have to be told twice, scurrying quickly after him as he turned to walk towards his car. I ducked into the passenger's seat, rubbing my chest painfully where the bond tugged. I knew that Corey had to be somewhere near the door of the restaurant as I was able to move far enough away to get into Tyrus's car. I found myself staring out of the window blankly as we sat, unmoving. 

"Contrary to popular belief, I'm not stupid." I snapped my head over to Tyrus as he spoke, his eyes swiveling to meet mine as well. "I know that you have feelings for my brother." 

I opened my mouth to say something to refute his statement but caught myself right before more word vomit spilled from my lips. Instead, I waited a long moment, allowing myself time to construct a more accurate, truthful reply to his statement.

"It's more complicated than that." I replied, although I was not able to speak above a whisper. I knew that if I did then I would inevitably end up in my first fit of tears since I was a child. 

"One of Daffodil's gifts is seeing. He can see someone's core emotions through touch. When he touched you and Corey that one day in your room, he saw the pain and turmoil in your heart." Tyrus's gaze was soft as he held mine. I strangely felt somewhat soothed knowing that someone knew my secret, biting my lip as he continued. 

"Ortiz, the only way that you can allow yourself to be loved is if you love yourself first." 

I painfully tore my eyes away from his, settling my gaze on my hands that rested my lap. 

"But... I was never taught how to do that." I whispered, my voice cracking for the second time today as I fought to keep myself from falling apart at the seams. 

"Then let Corey teach you." 

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CHAPTERS WILL BE GETTING SPICYYYY FROM HERE SO STAY TUNED LAY-DEEZ, THEY-DEEZ AND GENTS!

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