Preston's POV

When Flores and I said our goodbyes to Karsten, Adrien, their roommates, and got onto the bus to head home, my head spun and my chest burned. I sat on the farthest seat in the back of the bus next to Flores, arms crossed over my chest as I looked out the window, my lips pressed flat.

All I could think about was Luka and his perfect hair, perfect eyes, perfect everything, and how he just bought Adrien new art supplies like it was a casual thing for him to do. How Adrien hugged him and it seemed so natural to do so. These thoughts plagued my head for hours and all I could do was obsess about it, trying to find a single bad thing about him so I could justify hating him. But I couldn't. And I hated that I hated him for being a nice guy.

I hated that I felt like this. I didn't want to feel like this. All I could do was obsess over the idea of Adrien being with Luka and I felt like a crazy person for doing so. I didn't want to tell anyone, because that would just make me seem like an ass because I was jealous when I shouldn't be, and I didn't want Adrien or anyone else to think of me differently, or like I was trying to control his life. I didn't want to ruin Adrien's happiness and didn't want to ruin the friendship we were trying to rebuild.

Yeah, I couldn't tell anyone. I just really needed a drink. The thoughts were eating me alive and I just needed a distraction. It was Sunday anyhow, still the weekend, so it was okay for me to have a drink or two and just de-stress from my thoughts and life in general. That's all I needed.

For now, I just had to deal with the ugly bitterness that left a sour taste in my mouth and left my skin on edge. I could barely relax and felt ready to jump out of my own skin.

"Hey," Flores' soft tone snapped me from my thoughts, "Are you okay?"

I blinked and tore my gaze from the window to look at him. His brows were furrowed together as he looked at me, and I sighed, nodding my head.

"Yeah, I'm fine."

"Are you sure?" He asked again, "You just seem a bit bitter. You've seemed a bit off all day, and even more so now, so I was just wondering if something happened?"

"I'm fine, Flores," I said, "Nothing happened."

"But—"

"Can we just drop it?" I snapped at him, chest burning once more, "I'm fine, nothing happened, so stop asking me."

Flores frowned. He didn't look too convinced, but he nodded his head nonetheless, turning his gaze away as he leaned back in his seat. I sighed heavily and ran my fingers through my hair, taking a quick breath to calm my growing frustration. I plugged my headphones into my ears and played some music on my phone, shutting out my surroundings, hoping Flores would take the hint and not bug me for the rest of the bus ride.

***

"Flores, Preston! Welcome back!" Primrose greeted cheerfully. Flores closed the door behind after we stepped into our dorm, and I kicked off my shoes and coat, flashing a brief smile at Primrose.

"Thanks, Prim."

"How was your visit? What did you guys do?" Elijah asked, a curious grin on his face.

"I'm sure we can get an idea of what Flores and Karsten did," Blaire chimed in, winking at Flores.

Flores scoffed, "Is sex all you guys ever think about?"

"Oh, I'm just teasing," Blaire laughed, "you two should come join us. We're just catching up on some homework and lecture notes. I wanna know all the details about your visit!"

Flores and I agreed. We put away our overnight bags before joining Blaire, Elijah, and Primrose in the living room with our laptops and textbooks, and we all sat on the floor around the coffee table, chatting about our visit with Adrien and Karsten as we did our homework. Well, I tried to at least. I couldn't really focus much on the conversation at hand, or my schoolwork, because all I could think about was wanting a drink to get the obsessive thoughts out of my head.

"That was the cutest thing I've ever seen," Karsten gushed the moment Luka left, "he went out of his way to buy you more art supplies, that's a man you have to marry."

A blush coated Adrien's cheeks. He sat back down at the kitchen table, putting the bag of art supplies down next to him, "it's just art supplies, it's not a big deal. He's just being nice."

"Oh come on, we all know he likes you," Luella commented, "it's so fucking obvious with the way he looks at you and the way he treats you. You need to jump his bones before I do!"

Adrien rolled his eyes and chuckled, "we're just friends, Lu. That's all. As I said, he was just being nice, so let's talk about something else, okay?"

Right. Just friends my ass. Adrien's roommates were right. It was obvious Luka likes him and that just makes my blood boil.

"You guys have to have Adrien and Karsten visit, perhaps with their other roommates too! Would love to meet them and I think it would be fun for all of us to hang out," Blaire commented.

"Agreed, we could drink, play music, I think it would be a fun time," Elijah replied in agreement.

"Definitely sounds like a plan," Flores nodded. He turned to face me, "what do you think, Preston?"

"Huh?" I blinked, looking away from my laptop screen to look at my roommates.

"We were talking about how we should have Adrien and Karsten over to visit. Maybe with their other roommates as well. What do you think?" Flores asked. I hummed, nodding my head slowly.

"Yeah, that would be fun," I nodded my head. Then, I stood up from the floor, brushing off my jeans, "I'm gonna grab myself a quick drink. You guys want any?"

"Ohhh yes please!" Blaire replied, "you should put that frozen pizza in the oven too, I'm starving."

I chuckled, "Yeah, sure thing."

***

Later that night, when it was around 10 pm, after having a few drinks and eating pizza, we decided to quit our homework for the night and now, we were all just chilling and drinking and playing music. I sat cross-legged on the floor, my fourth alcoholic drink sitting next to me while I strummed my guitar on my lap. Elijah had his own guitar out, Blaire whipped out her violin, and we just took turns listening to each other play.

“Do you guys have any idea on what songs you’re gonna perform for our solo assignments next month?” Elijah spoke up.

“Not yet, but I do have a couple of songs in mind that I may want to perform,” Blaire replied.

“Oh! You know what would be fun? We could help each other practice!” Primrose spoke up. 

“I’m down for that,” Flores replied. Blaire and Elijah also expressed their agreements. 

“Yeah, I’m in too,” I responded. 

“Perfect!” Primrose cheered. 

I chuckled and smiled. I looked back down at my guitar sitting in my lap, and gently fiddled with the strings. 

I closed my eyes, tuning into the way the strings glided against my fingers, and the soft tunes that lulled my ears. A million songs whispered through my head as I tried to pick one that I wanted to play, before naturally, my fingers started strumming harder against my guitar as a song popped into mind. 

I strummed the beat of Call Out My Name by The Weeknd against my guitar, the emotions suddenly rushing threw me as I started to sing the lyrics, taking all the thoughts and feelings I’ve felt throughout the day and poured them into each word. Adding onto the fact that I was slightly buzzed from the drinks I’ve had, just made everything more amplified. 

When I hit the chorus, and sang louder, I opened my eyes to see Elijah joining in on beat with his own guitar. A slightly different sound, but smoothly blended into the beat. Eventually, Blair started playing her violin in tune with the two of us, Primrose and Flores joining in with mellowed hums. I couldn’t help but smile, and pour my heart out into the lyrics even more.

All I could think about was Adrien while I sang. I wish that I still didn’t have feelings for him and that I could just get over it so I could be happy seeing him be happy, but I wasn’t. A part of me can’t help but feel like he’s moving onto better things without me, and eventually, I’ll be lost in the dust altogether. I couldn’t blame him though, because if I hadn’t been so stupid, and so caught up in my hurt feelings, we’d probably still be together, and I wouldn’t have to feel like this. But now, these are the consequences I have to live with for fucking up, and it sucks. 

By the time we finished the song, and our music slowly faded into silence, Primrose started cheering and clapping, as did Elijah. Blaire laughed, and Flores smiled wide.

“That was so good!” Primrose cheered, “god, I have goosebumps! And Preston, you have such a good voice! I didn’t know you could sing like that!”

“Thanks Prim,” I chuckled. She grinned.

“I agree, that was awesome!” Blaire exclaimed, “we’re gonna rock our solo performance assignments next month.” 

“Hell yeah we are,” Elijah said. He and Blaire high-fived. I smiled softly and picked my drink up off the floor, and took long swing of it.