‘Good afternoon, Solus Pharmaceuticals, how can I help you?’

‘Hi, I’m here to make a complaint about one of your products’ said an angry sounding woman.

‘OK, which product is this you wish to make a complaint about?’

‘The fat reduction pill’

‘OK, what is your issue with it?’

‘I’m not getting any slimmer! And it says on the box it’s guaranteed to make me do just that!’

‘It’s not guaranteed to, madam. It’s recommended that you exercise well and eat a heathy diet, too’

‘Well I’m doing just that, and I have noticed nothing! Now can I speak to your supervisor?’ Charlie put his phone away from the receiver, groaning.

‘Yes, I can, I’ll put you on hold for a moment’ Charlie got out of his chair, walking over to his supervisor. She was an obese, slouched woman wearing round glasses. ‘Sandy?’

‘Yes, Charlie?’

‘I’ve got another woman complaining about our weight loss pills’

‘Oh my god are you serious? Put her through’

‘OK’ Charlie went back over to his desk, transferring the call over to Sandy. Not too long later, he received another phone call. ‘Good afternoon Solus Pharmaceuticals how can I help you?’

‘Hi there. I wanted to make a complain about the weight loss pills that your company offers’ said a male voice

‘OK, what’s your issue?’

‘My daughter was taking them recently, she has died’ Charlie gasped, being silent for about five seconds.

‘I’m very sorry to hear that, sir. I’ll write a record of this right away’ at this point everyone in the office was looking at him. ‘What’s your name?’

‘Terance Watson’

‘And the name of your daughter?’

‘Ashley Watson, spelt “A-S-H-L-E-I-G-H”’

‘OK, and her date of birth?’

‘The nineteenth of January two-thousand and two’

‘OK, thank you’ Charlie was shaking at this point of the conversation, his face was red, too ‘An investigation will be launched into this matter, thank you for your time’ the was silence on the other end of the line ‘Is there anything else you need help with today?’

‘No thanks’

‘OK. Have a nice day’ Charlie put the phone down. ‘Oh god…’

‘What happened, Charlie?’ asked a nearby colleague

‘Someone’s died because of the diet pills’ Sandy was right next to him.

‘You should be saying someone’s “allegedly” died because of the diet pills’ she grumbled ‘There’s no evidence that they cause that’ Charlie didn’t say anything. ‘The other caller was saying you recommended exercise and a “healthy” diet to help. She found that condescending and rude’ everyone in the office was glaring at her. ‘Now just watch yourself, OK?’

‘But it literally says that on the pack. Let me show you’ After a little while he showed Sandy the packaging for the diet pills. In a fine print it said “weight reduction pills are not a replacement for a healthy life and a balanced diet”. ‘See what I’m saying?’ Sandy had a huge scowl on her face.

‘Hmph. Get back to work’ around ten minutes at twelve o’clock later Charlie left his desk for his lunch break. A slightly short young looking lady with long wavy brown hair wearing glasses was waiting for him there, smiling at him.

‘Hey Charlie, how are you today?’

‘Not too good, Lucia’ he said, sighing.

‘Oh, what’s wrong?’ Charlie had a look around the break room.

‘Someone died because of the weight loss drug’ Lucia just groaned.

‘That’s no good’

‘Plus my boss had a go at me for supposedly being rude to a customer’ Lucia shook her head.

‘Most of them are assholes. It’s hard not to be!’

‘I didn’t even think I was being rude to begin with, again it was about the weight loss drug, she said it wasn’t making her thinner and I told her she needed more exercise’ Lucia chuckled.

‘Stupid woman’ she said ‘They’re just too lazy to try out the obvious solution’

‘Yeah, I know. Eating less fast food could help, too’ Charlie went into his pocket to look at his phone, he had receive a message from Angelica that read: “Of course you should. Hell, I would break up with her if I were you”. Charlie instantly looked miserable as soon as he read the message.

‘Are you OK, Charlie?’ asked Lucia

‘Oh, I’ve got a text from my cousin. She says I should break up with my girlfriend’ Lucia smiled for a few seconds, before later having a scowl on her face.

‘Do you agree with her?’

‘Well… it’s hard to say. My girlfriend’s nice, for the most part, but we hardly ever see each other nowadays. That and… oh, never mind’

‘What do you mean, “never mind”?’

‘Well, I keep hearing rumours that she’s been seeing other guys. They may not be true, though’

‘They probably are, Charlie. Rumours don’t just appear out of nowhere’ Charlie didn’t say anything in return. He just gazed at his phone. ‘Just dump her already. No reason’s too stupid. If you’re not happy with her that’s a good enough reason on it’s own’

‘I’ll… talk to her later. Maybe after work’

‘Just remember this, Charlie: don’t ever feel like you should be owned by anyone. It’s OK to be single, honest. I mean look, I’m single. I’m happy. Of course I would like to be with someone in the future but at least I’m not in a relationship that makes me miserable. Just do the right thing, OK?’ Charlie looked a bit thrown off by what she said.

‘I… I suppose you’re right’ he then sighed ‘I don’t even remember the last time I was single, though’

‘It’s not as bad as you think’

‘I guess not’ Charlie went back on his phone, texting: “I’ll talk to her later. My co-worker is saying the same thing”. The two later just sat in sight in silence, eating their lunches. Later on Charlie received a text from Angelica that said: “Your co-worker is smart”. Charlie smiled as he read it. ‘Lucia?’

‘Yeah?’

‘My cousin Angelica thinks you’re smart’

‘Awww, thanks! Tell her I appreciate it. Oh, and tell her I’m a girl, too’

‘OK’ Charlie entered a text saying: She thinks that’s really sweet of you. She’s a girl btw” and then sent the text message. A few moments later, he got a text back saying: “You should probably be with her instead!”. Charlie’s face went a bit pink as he read that.

‘What did she say, Charlie?’

‘Ummm, she appreciates your sentiment’

‘Oh, all right. Fine’ she then looked at the clock on the wall. It was roughly five minutes to one. ‘Oh god, look at the time!’ Charlie looked at the clock.

‘Ugh, why is this is the only time of the day that goes fast? I’ll be back to my desk’

‘Me too, see you later’ they got off their chairs ‘Oh, do you have my phone number?’

‘I don’t think so…’ Lucia wrote it down on a piece of paper.

‘Give me a text later, OK?’

‘OK… what’s gotten into you?’ she smiled at him and left. ‘OK, back to work, I guess’ Charlie went back over to his desk with a face that signalled total misery. He spent the rest his day at work answering phone calls from agitated customers.