I suddenly thanked God and Buddha for allowing me to be resurrected.
After a few days of snow, a few days of rain, the sky has gradually turned sunny.
My health has gradually recovered thanks to the attentive and dedicated care of my mother. Only, apart from my mother, everyone in the family still feels heavy because of my return. But after my extreme act of jumping into the lake to commit suicide, they did not dare to use offensive words to provoke me anymore.
The person who once missed a death often appreciates life, I am such a person. I struggled to accept my father's cold eyes and my younger brother's unfriendly gaze, behind their backs, I often consoled myself.
I used to sit in the small attic playing the piano. There is a Tu Truong Co. Like a young woman waiting for her husband's day.
Four years have passed, the scene is still there, but the person is gone. Not all is lost, time still retains a lot of precious memories, it makes me like an old person, at ease but sitting in a chain of those memories.
Two months later. The peach garden below the apartment began to bloom. The cold winter has passed, the beautiful spring has arrived.
Coincidentally, he and spring returned at the same time.
Of course, I used to doubt if he was the one to bring spring.
My mother told me to go to the living room in the evening to have dinner with everyone. I didn't understand what my mother meant, hesitated for a moment, but finally agreed.
I still clearly remember that evening, when the afternoon rain had just stopped, the sky was as if it had just been washed, the moonlight was beautiful.
There were two guests in the house, I still bowed my head after the ceremony, still worrying.
"Younger cousin?" A voice said, still as warm as four years ago.
I was shocked as if I had just been electrocuted, and when I looked up, I met those eyes.
The owner of those eyes is the man that I have longed for day and night, I still remember as vividly four years ago, it was he who taught me what love is.
Because it was so unexpected, it was the first time we met again after many years of separation, I forgot all my etiquette and just stared at him blankly.
Four years have passed, but time does not seem to have left any trace on him, still smiling eyes, still elegant, full of style.
And the person sitting in front of him, has turned from an innocent girl to an abandoned wife.
When comparing these two identities, I couldn't stand that look, so I lowered my head. Before his gaze, I felt extremely self-conscious.
I secretly blamed my mother, why did she call me to meet, but met the right cousin, whom I could not peacefully admit to being an abandoned wife. I'd rather never see my cousin again, so the impression of me in his mind is still an innocent, pure girl.
“Is this the cousin of Sa Sa? It's true that girls grow up so much, I almost didn't notice!" Cousin exclaimed, as if he could not hide his feelings “I remember four years ago, my younger cousin was fifteen years old, right? I thought that this one-of-a-kind beautiful younger cousin would have already been married to someone! Didn't expect to see you again here! Younger cousin is hesitant to get married, is he still being picky, hasn't found a guy he likes?"
After the cousin's words, everyone in the house turned to look at each other, not knowing how to respond.
Father sighed again, his face darker, raised his cup and drank alone. The younger brother smiled faintly, did not bother to explain, only focused on the dishes. Mom turned her face away, as if trying to hide her tears.
Cousin saw the expression of everyone in the house change, an intelligent person like him knew that there must be some reason, so he resolved the gloomy atmosphere himself, "It must be his cousin. Sa Sa is waiting for his subordinates to come and propose.” After saying that, he laughed loudly.
“Bang…” with a sound, my bowl fell to the floor, shattering. The sound of broken bowls sliced through the air, crunching, humming.
Cousin has been wandering outside for so many years, he must have learned a lot. But how could he have thought that his last sentence was like a sharp needle, piercing my heart that was broken by suffering.
"Mom, Sa Sa has a bit of a headache." I was sad to tell my mother.
“Oh, eh! So go back to your room and rest!" After saying that, my mother helped me get up, “She has had many illnesses since she was a child, a few days ago she caught a cold and still hasn't fully recovered. Let me take her home to rest. Disappointed everyone, please forgive me."
Mom helped me out. I tried to avoid my cousin's concerned gaze.
My hands are cold, my mother uses her hand to warm me but still can't warm my frozen heart.
Mom is a quick-witted woman, she knows that what I fear most right now are empty words of comfort, so she just helped me away, without saying a word.
That night, the full moon was like a full glass of water, the past things were like water spilling out of the cup.
My feelings of sympathy can only be buried in my heart in the end.
A sleepless night.
This time, my cousin was busy with business, and he came to visit my house on the way. Early the next morning was a hasty farewell.
Another time passed, right in March, peach blossoms bloomed in the spring sunshine, each flower racing to bloom. Every time the wind blows, the pink peach petals flutter in the wind, what a poetic scene.
I excitedly brought the instrument into the peach garden, strummed Tu Truong Co, a song that was both beautiful and tragic. The beauty has a name, the sad one has no name.
The small path in the garden was empty, peach blossoms were in full bloom, a few petals fluttered in the wind and then fell.
Sitting alone at the piano, immersed in the scenery, I seem to forget all my suffering, even myself.
I don't know how long after that, when I involuntarily raised my head, I saw him again!
He was walking towards me with confident steps. I was startled, surprised and worried at the same time.
I quickly stood up, feeling like a guest and the owner of the garden walking over there.
I stood up, bowed to my cousin with an uneasy mood.
“It was the sound of the piano that called me here. I don't want to spoil my cousin's taste. Cousin don't stop, keep playing. Pretend I'm not here. I have never heard such a beautiful sound before.”
He smiled and then sat down. I stole a glance at my cousin, his eyes like the clear sky washed by a rain shower, clear and sparkling. Cousin is very funny, just like the wind, makes people feel comfortable but can't hold it in their hands.
The personalities of the general and his cousin are completely opposite. The general was both cold and quiet.
Thinking of the general, I feel sad again, no longer in the mood to play the piano anymore.
"Cousin, little student, although I don't understand the law of yin" He suddenly opened his words, when he spoke, his eyes looked into the distance, as if I was somewhere far away
"But I really felt it. that, these sounds are only in the sky. If there are lyrics, can my cousin sing a song, the student will feel that he has not lived in this world in vain."
My cheeks flushed red and I bowed my head very low. After regaining my sanity, I began to sing and play at the same time.
The novel is an autobiographical story about the life of a talented girl in the Northern Trinh period named Sa Sa. Born into a religious family with the status of a young lady with golden branches and pearl leaves, she was carefully taught, full of talent, but it was these rituals that pushed Sa Sa's life to a point of extremes. The life of that girl will bring a lot of thoughts to readers about the fragility of human lives, especially the fate of the feudal woman.
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