“It won’t always be this bad,” I offer, trying my best to sound reassuring while the kid beside me crumples into his chair. 

“Because when I die I won’t feel the pain?” Big blue eyes blink up at me from underneath the fingers grasping his blond spikes of hair. 

“Mitchell!” Maya snorts, and some chocolate milk dribbles over her chin as she glares wildly at the poor freshman. “You’re being ridiculous. You’re doing so much better than most of the others, especially-” 

“That’s right,” I cut in and hand her a pile of napkins before she can spit the rest of her drink on us. “At least you haven’t cried during a set.” 

Mitch chuckles deeply while he drags a hand over his face. “That’s because I’ve been too dehydrated to produce tears.” 

“Hush.” Maya waves her fistful of napkins in his general direction. “The first few weeks are always rough because Scott’s a psychopath who enjoys watching his swimmers suffer. You know last year he even made up this game where-”

“Hey hey hey.” I interrupt, glancing around the crowded dining hall to make sure no one is close enough to hear this. She’s got a point, though.

“It’s true.” Maya sends me a look, then leans across the table to pat the kid’s fingers as they clench around a spoon. “Now eat your Cocoa Puffs.” 

Mitch grunts to himself, then he proceeds to stuff his mouth with cereal. His eyes close when he savors the sweetness, and I can clearly sense his mood shift for the better. “Mmm…that’s good advice, thank you.”

We’re two weeks into the start of swim season, and everyone is pretty much dead. Myself included, especially after this morning’s workout. It was a racing set, and I’ve been doing absolutely dreadful at practice as it is. I just can’t seem to find a rhythm with any of my strokes, even though I trained straight through the summer. 

“Yoohoo!” Maya’s small brown fingers snapping in my face pull me back to our breakfast Pod meeting. 

The team likes to organize bonding activities, and breaking us into small groups like this is one that’s been a tradition since before I was a freshman. There are far more underclassmen on the team, so this year both juniors and seniors had to split to lead the groups by offering advice, being helpful, or just guiding the complaining sessions in a less toxic direction. We drew names at random for the Pods, and I totally lucked out with mine. Except for some minor dramatics, I’ve grown fairly fond of my freshman buddy, and Maya has always been cool.

“Stop ignoring me!” 

At least, mostly cool. “I’m nooooooot-”

“Ugh.” She scowls at the display of munched omelet in my mouth, her round greenish-hazel eyes narrowing. “So how’d the Senior meeting go with Scott last night?” 

I flinch, and she notices. “Fine,” I mutter.

“Lying is not permitted during Pod time,” she snaps before I’ve fully prepared for how to get around this. 

Mitch perks up and gives me a wide-eyed, blinkless look. “Coach met with you on a Friday night?!”

“Yup.” Maya grimaces through a bite of fresh strawberries. “That’s why the team bonding event is combined with the swim party tonight.” 

“Uh…” I wrack my brain for an explanation that doesn’t sound too insane. “Scott likes to communicate frequently-”

“Psh.” 

“Maya!”

“Our coach is a control freak,” she explains, brushing me off with a flick of her wrist. 

“New topic, please.” I fail to keep all hints of pleading from my tone. 

They both grin at me after exchanging quick glances. I’m exhausted. 

“Hey, isn’t that your girlfriend?” Mitch pipes up after a few moments of wonderfully peaceful silence. 

Oh, hell. I peer over my glass of orange juice in time to catch Leigh’s bright blonde hair swishing from across the room while she waits in the omelet line. “Uh...yeah.”

“Can she eat with us?!” The excitement in his tone would be funny to me if this was happening like...six months ago. 

“Absolutely not!” Maya’s voice carries a forced lightness in it as she knocks a little fist on the table. “How dare you. No one is allowed to pop our Pod bubble. This is sacred bonding time.” 

“Aww.” He stuffs his pout with more Cocoa Puffs, and I release the breath I didn’t realize I was holding. 

So...she knows. 

I avoid looking anywhere but the remnants of melted cheese clinging to my plate while they chatter on about the intrasquad meet we’re having for Alumni Weekend in a couple weeks.

Maya knows Leigh asked for a break. 

~

I tune back in when I hear my name. “I will not.”

“Don’t be a party poop.” Maya juts her lower lip at me and sticks her faded purple wallet under my nose. “I spent all summer working to boost my catharsis fund, so I’ll even pay extra.” 

“Same here, even though I’m broke.” Mitch’s grin stretches so wide I can see little bits of chocolate stuck between his teeth.

“I refuse to buy for the likes of you.” I lean back in my seat and cross my arms, narrowing my stare on her seething glare. “But I gotchu, Mitch. What’ll you have?” 

“What the-you’re such a fucking douche canoe!” Maya nearly screeches. “Paddle your sexist-ass right back over here and get me that tequila you bought that one time we-”

“No, and you know exactly why I’m not doing you any favors.” I cut her off, forcing my grin into hiding while I reposition my body to face only Mitch. “Your order?” 

“Uhhhhhh…” He rests his chin on his hands, his eyes going so big I have to swallow a laugh. 

“He’s new to drinking-weren’t you listening?” Maya scolds, flicking the back of my head. “Way to be a mentor.”

“You’ve never drank?” I swat her away while I try my very hardest to keep my attention on our freshman buddy.

“I just did once during freshman orientation week.” Mitch glances behind me when the girl releases a heated sigh. 

“Seth,” she says, her tone laced with more than annoyance. “We just had a whole conversation about this.”

“Sorry sorry.” I shoot Maya a quick grin I hope is apologetic before turning back to the kid. “Wait...who bought for you during orientation? I was the only upperclassman swimmer on campus, and I know for a fact your RA would never cross that line. Plus Ethan’s not twenty-one yet.”