Too bad I couldn’t get any sleep. Which wasn’t any news for me either. I was somewhat used to tossing and turning in bed. It was my overthinking brain that I blamed most nights, but today I also blamed Do-hyun. I couldn't stop thinking about him and all that had happened earlier in the day.
Thank gods I wasn’t hungover anymore. That would’ve sucked big time. Seemed like the hangovers had gotten worse over the years, too. I guess I wasn’t twenty anymore.
On top of that, the nerves started to creep up on me, as tomorrow—the comeback day—was only hours away. For the most parts, I was very excited to get back on stage, back in the spotlight. I had longed to meet some members of the GRiD Crew for well over two years, almost three.
If it wasn’t for the damn fanservice…
I cut that thought short and jumped up from the bed. After grabbing my phone and the wireless headphones from the side table, I yanked on the same sweatpants from earlier and a huge sweater, then stomped out the door and headed to the dance studio.
It was a habit. My one coping method.
Not wanting to wake anyone else up, I sneaked past the other’s bedrooms, across the dark living room, and all the way downstairs.
I left the door to the studio cracked open to get some light from the hallway inside the room to brighten it up a little more. Of course that also meant I couldn’t blast the music from the speakers, but I could do with my wireless headphones as well. I didn’t want to turn on the harsh white and bright lights on the ceiling of the dancing studio. It would’ve made me even more awake than what I already was. The goal was the exact opposite tonight—to get me to sleep.
Besides, I knew the place inside out by now, so I didn’t need that much light. Browsing my music library on my phone, I walked over to the side table. Once I settled for "Contrast"—the single we were to release tomorrow morning, I smiled. No harm in practicing a little. Practice makes perfect. Well, at least better.
I connected the headphones to the phone via bluetooth and laid the phone down on the table. I had some time before the choreo would start—the song had a long intro—so I stretched briefly while walking my way to the dead center of the room.
Closing my eyes, I let my mind go blank and the music vibrate through my body and immerse me completely. It was almost as all my senses were cut off except hearing, and I floated a little above the surface of the floor. Every muscle, every bone and sinew worked harmoniously together, to create something pleasing, sensual and beautiful.
To be honest, I loved the song.
The dance, however, was by far the sexiest we had ever had. Compared to the one I had danced with Do-hyun yesterday—one of our first duets—this one took it up several notches. And this was a song for our whole group.
I hadn’t exactly meant for the choreograph to be this…racy. It had happened on its own. As if the music had demanded me to shape it in such a way. And I always lost whenever trying to battle against the music. Body roll after body roll I danced to the beat pounding to my ear. With my eyes closed, I fully concentrate on the complicated choreograph, yet still let my mind let loose.
I was at the part that I should’ve done with Do-hyun, when something felt slightly wrong. As if someone was in the room with me. Eventually I shrugged the feeling off, though, and continued dancing.
But when I reached the part where the beat dropped and Do-hyun was supposed to run his hand on my thigh, I could almost feel it. Then I could really feel his hand sliding higher, past my hips and on to my side… He even lifted my shirt to expose my abs as he was supposed to in the choreo, but I didn’t feel the usual warmness in my heart that Do-hyun’s presence normally inflicted.
I was immensely relieved. Maybe I hadn’t caught feelings after all. I smiled widely to myself, not even bothering to open my eyes. It wasn’t unheard of that Do-hyun would join me in these late-night practice sessions, as the other night had proved. Plus, he wasn't a bad company most of the time, when my heart wasn’t obsessing over him.
When the song ended, we were both gasping for air. The choreography was by no means easy; in fact, it took a lot of stamina. I didn't want the magical moment to end, so I kept my eyes shut and continued to dance to the next random song that started blasting through my headphones.
"I gotta give it to you, your part of the choreo ain’t easy," a voice said very near me, which certainly wasn't Do's.
The voice startled me, and I finally opened my eyes...only to stare straight in the eyes of Tae.
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