Tess, he thought. 

Keenin dropped his weapon and ran for the library. It wasn’t long before he could see the flames branching out through the upper floor windows. Some of the neighbors had lined up to throw buckets of water onto the flames, but the water hardly reached. Tess was calling out from somewhere inside, yet the front doors had remained closed. He ran for those doors, but was captured by a pair of strong hands on his arm.

“Child. You can do nothing.”

“The doors! Open the doors!” Keenin screamed at them. 

“We mustn’t let in any more air. The flames will get worse,” the stranger told him.

“They're still in there! They're still in there!” Keenin screamed. 

The adults weren’t listening to him. The man who restrained him was telling him to calm down and refused to let go. Keenin stopped struggling and dragged in some uneasy breaths. The man loosened his grip. Keenin took that moment to break free and he rushed forward to grab hold of the door handle. There was no burn, but the door seemed heavier than usual, as though some otherworldly force was holding it shut. The man from earlier grabbed his waist and tried to pull him back. It was a mistake for Keenin still gripped the handle and the extra tug caused the door to burst open. The fire ahead roared with raging intensity and he felt that he was already burning, but Keenin wasn’t looking at the flames. There was Tess with her mother on the stairs. They were almost to the bottom. Keenin rushed into the burning building, not caring that his lungs clogged with heat and smoke as he raced towards them. 

A horrendous ripping sound shook the building and before he could reach Tess the ceiling came crashing down. Keenin reflexively threw his arms over his head and closed his eyes, but when he felt nothing hit him he blinked the settling dust out of his vision. On the stairs Tess was trapped under the weight of her mother and the fallen ceiling, but unlike her mother she was still alive, her eyes watching. She looked at him. 

“Leave,” she said. 

In shock Keenin almost convinced himself that this was his imagination, but if it had been a dream then her hand would be in his and they would be walking out the door. Instead, her words sounded accusing. Her hazel eyes were full of pain and growing dull, and he knew that this was his fault. Why had he thought this was right? Alaban also. Alaban was also going to die. Hot tears ran down his cheeks and obscured his vision. He turned towards the door where he had come and saw a beam fallen across the door.

It almost felt like a fitting end. He hadn’t listened to his friend, he hadn’t listened to the adults and he was going to die because he had wanted to help them all. From his mother to his friend Lester, to the thieves, and the regretful old hero. He had hurt whomever he wanted to help. 

“Do you want to save her?” a voice asked behind him.

Keenin blinked his teary eyes and looked back at Tess. He seemed to be hallucinating from the smoke because Tess was there as he had last seen, except now she was alive. While still trapped under the rubble, she rested her chin on the floor and looked at him with ice blue eyes that didn’t belong to her. He had wanted to save her too.

“It seems to me,” Tess spoke, “That you and she are the only ones who need saving. Everyone else has saved themselves.”

“Who?” Keenin questioned it, “Are you.”

Was this his guilt. 

“I’m a figment of your mind,” it said. “Am, I not?”

It had to be. It wasn’t even Tess. It was probably his melting mind trying to process his trauma.

“So,” it said. “Do you want her back?”

“Of course,” Keenin told it.

He had wanted all of them to be safe. He had wanted them to exist in the same happy town and be normal like everyone else.

“Then, why don’t you give me your unfortunate life,” it told him.

“For what?”

And did he really think himself unfortunate?

“For this girl,” it said.

Was this a joke?

“I am going to die,” Keenin said, “You might have noticed I’m trapped in a burning building. I can’t trade my life.”

And what sort of end of life fantasy ended with him dying. Where was his cozy family life?

“Of course,” it said. “But I never said I would save you. I want your body, but it’s only fair to present a trade.”

This was strange, Keenin thought. This was beyond hallucinations. Was this real? Was this a nightmare? He was supposed to be trapped in a fire and yet for a while now he didn’t feel it, didn’t hear it. 

“Aren’t you me?”

Was this not his fear and his guilt?

“Times almost up Keenin,” it said. “The girl’s life for your body. You people say it all time. A dying man has nothing to lose.”

“Wait I—

He put a hand to his head which felt dizzy. Where was he? His throat was dry and he tasted smoke, but if this was a fire he should have escaped. This thing was keeping him here.

“Keenin,” the voice prompted. “Should I let her live?”

It wasn’t fair, Keenin thought. He could have tried to get out. He might have tried to start again, even if it was impossible, even if he got burnt and blamed. Why wasn’t he burned? That’s it. This had to be a dream. Keenin looked back to the door to see more debris piled in front. His sweat felt cold against his skin.

“It would have been difficult to talk,” the voice said. “So I asked the flames to leave you alone.”

“I see. You… weren’t lying.”

Dream or not, death had come.

“Then, I accept,” Keenin said. 

At least this Tess could enjoy what he couldn’t. Keenin turned back to ask the thing that looked like Tess how this would work, but was faced only with her charred and burning corpse. A flaming figure floated above and then exploded into sparks. 

Keenin didn’t understand. He stood in the swirl of smoke. Around him paper and wood were crumbling to ash. Red flames flashed through the grey of the smoke. But even stranger than the dreamlike destruction, was the sound of outside voices. Keenin could hear people shouting over the roar of the fire and one voice was louder than the rest.

“Keenin!”

It was Alaban. He was alive. Keenin heard a slam against the wall and when he turned he saw the same blocked door. Despite the swirl of smoke his lungs felt fine and his skin felt cooled. Something was wrong with him, Keenin decided. He heard the door crack with a force.

“Boy!” Alaban hollered.

“Don’t come in!” Keenin shouted.

Everything else was burning. It was only him that wasn’t and the building wasn’t stable.

“Boy,” Alaban said not using his name. “Look where you are.”

But hadn’t he killed Tess.

“Just follow my voice. Can you do that for me? It can be your last job if that’s what you want.”

Images of everyday work flashed through Keenin's head. Preparing plants, crushing seeds, sitting at the shop stall. He liked those things.

“Ok,” Keenin said.

He set his sights on the doorway where the beam and debris blocked his path. An idea prompted him to lift a hand and the large beam burst into flames that disintegrated it to ash along with anything else in the way. Too exhausted to care Keenin stepped forward to opened the door and fell unconscious into Alaban’s arms.