"Haven't you had enough of all of this? Haven't you had enough of loneliness?"

~Lewis Capaldi, 'Don't Get Me Wrong'

~~~

*Ryland's POV*

"I'm not sure if these will fit, but you can try them on. The bathroom is down the hall," I say as I hand a shirt and a pair of shorts to Landon.

When he reaches forward to take the clothes, our fingers brush, sending tingles up my arm. Landon lets his hand linger for a second before yanking his hand back with a blush. I can't help the slight sting that follows that, but I have to remind myself that this is new for the both of us. We have to take things slow.

He scurries down the hall and locks himself in the bathroom. I sigh and turn back around, heading towards my room. It doesn't come as a surprise when I see Kai sitting on my bed, arms folded over his chest.

I shut the door gently behind me, knowing whatever is about to happen might get kind of loud. It is Kai, after all.

"Why are you so calm about this?" Kai jumps right in. I shake my head, grabbing a pair of jeans and stepping into them.

"I don't know. Maybe I'm in shock," I ponder. "I never thought I'd get another chance at having a mate, but here he is. Whatever the Moon Goddess did to give us both another mate, I'm not going to take it for granted. I've watched so many of my friends be happy with their mates. Don't you think I deserve to have a mate, too?"

Kai's face softens. "Of course I do, but...." he pauses and sighs. "Aren't you worried?"

"About what?"

He squirms on my bed, chewing on his bottom lip nervously. "About what would happen if he were to reject you," he whispers.

The blood in my body freezes over, my limbs locking in place. My entire body becomes restricted with the fear of being rejected a second time. I lost River the first time.... would I lose myself the second time?

I can't.

I can't go through that again. I'll do anything — everything — to keep Landon from rejecting me.

Please, Goddess. I don't know if you actually listen to us, but please.... please don't put me through that again. Please don't give me another mate, just so you can tear him away. Please...

"Ryland," Kai says softly, suddenly standing in front of me and gripping my arms. "You're okay. I'm here. Breathe. Come on, you can do it. In through your nose, and out though your mouth."

I follow his calm instructions, taking deep breaths until my body doesn't feel as rigid. Kai keeps holding onto me as I start to relax. He watches me, checking for any signs that I might start freaking out again.

"I'm okay," I breathe out, my voice a little hoarse. Kai's eyes run over my face before he nods and takes a step back.

A knock at the door pulls our attention, and I rush over to open it. Landon is standing there, nervously shuffling his feet and scratching the back of his neck.

"Um.... I'm ready to go when you are," he says. My gaze flickers down his body, and my heart begins to pound in my chest. The sight of my mate in my clothing fills me with excitement, and I want nothing more than to scoop him into my arms and hold him close.

"Let's go," I say before I accidentally slip up by moving too quickly and scaring him off. He follows me down the stairs to where Ronnie is waiting on the couch. She gives me a nod as we make our way towards the door.

'Be careful,' she says to me.

'I will,' I reassure her, knowing why she's concerned. I don't doubt she has the same reservations as Kai, worried that I'm going to get hurt again. I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared too, but I'm choosing to stay optimistic for the time being.

We walk in silence to the deepest part of the pack where Joan, our elder wolf, lives alone. The elders are chosen by the Moon Goddess, given a special mark to let everyone know they have been chosen. The elder is usually a wolf that had a great impact on the pack during their earlier years, and is given a blessing by the goddess herself when they reach a later stage of life. Joan was one of our former Lunas, and she did amazing work for our pack to make us what we are today. No one was surprised when she bore the mark of the Moon, and was given the ability to live a longer life to serve the pack.

Since elders have a direct connection to the Moon, they are often sought out for guidance and wisdom. I'm hoping Joan will be able to reach out to the Moon and tell us how Landon and I became mated.

I knock on the door of the cottage with Landon shuffling nervously beside me, and my fingers twitch with the desire to hold his hand comfortingly. Before I can make such a move, the door swing open.

"Ryland," Joan's voice is smooth and deep, sending a wave of comfort over me. Her dark curls, which are only slightly darker than her gorgeous skin, are pulled up away from her face. The mark of the Moon is prominently displayed in the middle of her forehead; a crescent pattern that's a shade deeper than her skin. Joan smiles warmly at me, making me feel more relaxed. She looks at Landon and doesn't hesitate to smile at him as well. "Please, come in."

Her home is cozy, styled almost like a hut. There's a low round table with cushions on the ground in lieu of chairs, and the delectable smell of something boiling on the stove fills the air. Landon looks around, his blue eyes wide with awe. It makes me curious how different the home of his elder is.

Joan motions for both of us to take a seat, and we gingerly sit down on the cushions. The elder grabs two bowls and fills them with a creamy soup from the pot on the stove. She sets the bowls in front of us with a smile.

"Eat up. You both look exhausted," Joan says.

The realization that we left before the meal hits me as my stomach growls loudly. The corners of Landon's mouth twitches in a faint smile, which makes my face heat up.

We take a few bites of the soup, eyes widening by how delicious it is.

"What is this, Joan? It's amazing!" I ask her.

Joan smiles proudly. "Bisque. Family recipe."

I nod my head and dive back into my food, eating as fast as I can without making a mess. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Landon watching as I stuff my face with food, and I force myself to slow down and eat at a normal pace.

"Now then," Joan starts. "Why would two freshly mated wolves be coming to see me instead of spending some quality time together?"

Landon drops his spoon in his bowl, his eyes widening. "You can tell we're mates?"

Joan laughs heartily. "Of course, baby. I am blessed with a direct connection to our goddess. Your connection is freshly formed and is extremely strong. It would be harder for me not to sense that you are mates."