Before I knew it, the holidays were over and school had started back up again. It was the morning of our first day back, and like usual, Jack had gone and turned my alarm clock volume way up on me. Honestly, I don’t know how he kept managing to do that behind my back. It was blasting Bohemian Rhapsody this time. Normally, I was excited to get up and weigh, but after the Christmas dinner catastrophe, I seemed to have lost that excitement. So much so that I hadn't actually weighed since that day, so I had no idea where I was. I knew I was probably lower than 80lbs, especially since I've barely eaten anything since Christmas. But, of course, Diana was set on the fact that if I didn't weigh, then I gained weight.

Dad was on my back a lot more however. After our talk over the holidays, he was determined to find me the help I apparently needed. He tried booking me appointments, but I just happened to mysteriously disappear when I was supposed to go. Eventually, he quit doing that, and tried getting me to eat more at the table. The man even tried preparing my plate, but he couldn’t do anything about the amount I actually ate. But, back to the topic of school.

Usually I got super excited for school, but not this time. I didn't even know if I could get out of bed. I simply laid there whilst Bohemian Rhapsody played loudly. My body felt too heavy to be able to move, and despite the many layers of blankets that laid on top of me, I was still freezing. This did make me worry a bit. I felt like this a lot, but not nearly this bad. Was this it? Had I finally pushed myself too far? To get to a point I couldn't get out of bed?

It's not that you can't. You just don't want to. You've gotten LAZY.

I had let myself get lazy. That was true. I barely did much else but sit in bed and read. Walking just got too hard. It made me feel lightheaded and woozy, and would make my chest hurt. I tried doing workouts, but I couldn’t handle those either. But I figured it was all ok if I didn't eat, or kept my calories low.

"DIANE! GET UP!" Dad yelled from the kitchen.

Dad had the day off today, so he didn't have to leave the house early like normal. The yell gave me the push I needed to get up and grab my glasses. I sat on the side of my bed for a bit before standing up. My vision immediately went black, and before I knew it, I was on the ground. Dad heard the thud from the kitchen and ran into my room to see what had happened.

"Diane!! Are you ok?" He cried as he knelt down beside me. Shakily, I was trying to get up, but couldn’t. I could hardly even register what just happened.

"F-fine… just got lightheaded… and fell…" I mumbled as Dad helped me up onto my bed.

"Lay back." He said once I was on my bed.

"B-but-, I gotta go to school!"

"No. You're staying home. You're in no state to go."

He pushed me back, and before I knew it, I was back where I started. Under my many layers of blankets, and stuck in bed. I tried fighting my way back out of bed, but Dad kept pushing me back. Sadly, I wasn’t strong enough to fight him.

"I knew this was going to happen. It was just a matter of when." Dad sighed. “Now do you see why I worry?”

"D-dad, I'm f-fine!"

"No you're not! Why can't you see that?!" He started raising his voice. "You're dying! Right in front of me!! Right in front of all of us!! And you're the only one who can't seem to see it!!"

I was taken aback by that comment. I knew he was upset by my eating habits, but not that upset! Heck, he looked like he could cry!

"Alright...!" I said. I didn't want to worry him any more than I already did. "I'll stay home."

"Thank you." He said. "Could you do one more thing for me?"

I already knew what he was going to ask.

"Can you PLEASE eat what I give you? Without arguments? Just for today. Preferably every other day too, but at least today."

"Do I have to?" I whined.

"Please?"

This was a first. I've never seen dad plead with me. He was very good at being strict and making sure we all stayed in line, but I've been going way out of line and he hasn't stopped me yet. So he must have been desperate to plead with me like this.

"...Fine." I sighed. I just wanted to make him happy. To not see him worried about me for once. He looked so happy when I replied that he looked like he could've cried. He gave me a huge hug.

"Thank god! Thank you!!" He cried happily. "I'll go get you breakfast ok? I'll be right back."

He ran off to the kitchen, and I sighed. I couldn't believe this. The thought of Robin finding out scared me. She was NOT going to be happy. She was almost definitely going to scold me for letting this happen.s

Dad came back a couple minutes later with a plate of food. He handed it to me and hesitantly, I took it and placed it on my lap. I examined what he had given me. There was a slice of toast with peanut butter on it and an assortment of fruit on the side. Surprisingly, it was a reasonable breakfast! I did some quick math and concluded that the whole meal was a little less than 400 calories. Yea it was on the higher end for me, but it was better than something worth thousands of calories. If it wasn't for the calorific peanut butter, it would've been something totally normal for me.

"Are you ok with that?" Dad asked hopefully.

"Yea." I replied. I expected dad would leave and do his own thing whilst I ate, which would make things easy. I could scrape off the peanut butter and eat the rest. Doing that would save me almost 200 calories, so it was all good.

That was, until he sat down beside me, and didn't look like he was going to go anywhere. I gave him a funny look as if to ask why he was sticking around.

"What?" He said. "I want to make sure you eat. Don't think I don't know how you work. If I left, you would probably scrape the peanut butter of your toast or something stupid like that."

"Me? No." I said nervously. I tore off a piece of toast and ate it, as if to prove my point. Now I was stuck with the deal I had made. I had to eat what was in front of me. Damn it. As I ate, I tried to convince myself that it was for the better. It was a metabolism boost! And tomorrow I would have a lot of energy! I could exercise again! Dad talked to me too while I ate. I think he wanted to distract me from overthinking, but in all honesty, it didn't work too well.

The rest of the day went like this. Every couple hours dad would bring me something to eat, I would hold in a breakdown, and then sleep. Dad seemed to want to make me eat 3 meals and 3 snacks which just sucked. By about 3:00 I was already totalling way over my allowance budget. I knew I was going to gain weight after that day for sure. Diana was not happy about this either. All day she screamed at me to purge, but the thing was, I couldn't get out of bed. If I tried to get up, my vision went black. Dad had to help me to the washroom, and if I had tried to purge whilst he was outside the door, I'd be in for it.

One thing that I was surprised by was that Robin hadn't texted me asking where I was. Normally she did that if I missed school. But I guess instead of texting, she decided to just come over instead. Once she got home from school she headed right over to my place. Dad let her in and told her were I was and what happened. I could hear her progressively sounding angrier as Dad told the story. Before long, I heard her stomp down to my bedroom.

"Diane!" She cried. "Oh my god, your Dad told me what happened! Do you know how much you’re worrying me?!"

"A hey how's it going would've been nice." I rolled my eyes. I really wasn't in the mood to deal with this. I was already pissed off with Dad because of how much he was making me eat. Robin let out a deep breath, and invited herself in to sit on my bedside.

"Ugh… look, I'm just really worried." She said. "I don't want to see you end up in the hospital or dead."

"Don’t worry. Dad’s got me eating so much that I’ll be completely fine by tomorrow.”

Robin raised a brow at me. "That's not how that works."

"Well, I'll gain at least a couple pounds. That’s what you guys want right? That’ll make me healthier or something?"

"A couple pounds of what? Water weight? Just because you eat well one day doesn't mean all your problems will instantly fix themselves."

"What problems."

"What problems?! Are you serious?? Diane, you can hardly get up!!"

"Ok, so I'm having a rough day. Big deal. Tomorrow I'll be fine."

"Not if you keep eating like you have been. Air won't sustain you for much longer."

I shot her a pissed off glare.

"Don't give me that!” Robin huffed. “You need to eat more and you know it!! Not to mention you should be at least 30lbs heavier than what you are now!! So no, a couple pounds won’t automatically make you healthier!"

"What are you talking about?!" I argued. "I don't need to get any fatter!!"

Robin looked at me in complete disbelief. "Oh for… that's it!!! If you won't eat by your own choice, then I'll make you!!"

"You can't make me." I hissed.

"Watch me."

"I don't need to gain weight!! I'm not that thin!! I'm like 80lbs or something!!"

Robin looked shocked. I instantly regretted saying that number. I should've kept my weight to myself. Robin’s expression went from angered, to fuming, to absolutely furious.

"From now on." She said with a cold voice. It wasn’t hard to tell she was gritting her teeth. "You are eating. Three. Bloody. Meals. A. Day. And if you don't, I'll make sure you end up in the hospital with a tube up your nose! At least it'll be something in your bloody system!!"

I couldn't believe she actually thought she could possibly make me such a thing. There was no way I was going to let her make me fat. No now. Not after all this work I've put into losing weight. And besides, Robin would probably forget about it the next day. So of course I didn't think much of it.

--

The next morning I was feeling much better. I got out of bed a little bit easier, and despite my vision blurring a bit when I stood up, I seemed to be doing ok. At least I didn’t feel like passing out. I was planning on weighing that morning, but decided I didn't want to see the damage I had done yesterday. So, like every other day, I did the usual. Got ready, and headed out to the bus, skipping breakfast of course.

Robin met me at the bus stop. She had something in her hand, but I couldn't see what. I had a feeling it was meant for me, but convinced myself it was probably something for school and I shrugged it off.

"Morning guys." Robin said as my siblings and I got to the bus stop.

"Morning!" Bella replied. Bella was a morning person, unlike Jack. Jack just groaned. He was probably still half asleep.

"Here." Robin shoved the paper bag she had in her hands at me. "For you."

Confused, I opened the bag enough to see there was a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in it. I quickly closed the bag and shoved it back her way.

"No, no. That's your breakfast. Eat it." Robin said. "Because I do believe you didn't eat breakfast, did you?"

"No, she did not." Bella ratted me out. I groaned. I couldn't believe she was actually going to try and force me to eat!!

"I won't eat it." I stated firmly, trying not to sound pissed. I didn’t need an argument before school.

"Yes you will." Robin stated. "Because if you don't, I'll shove it down your throat for you."

Robin was someone who usually did what she said what she would, and with the tone of her voice, I didn't doubt she would try that. So the question was, was I willing to take that chance?

"I would eat if I were you." Bella said.

I wasn't willing to take the chance of having a sandwich shoved down my throat, so I opened the bag and pulled it out. I stared at it for a bit to try and figure out an estimate of calories, but it was hard to tell. Maybe 500? Just to be safe? I didn't know. Peanut butter was super calorific, so it added up quick.

"Go on." Robin pushed. "You're supposed to eat it. Stop looking at it like it's gonna eat you."

Don't eat it!! Pig!! Throw it away!

I would've thrown it away if it had come from someone else. But Robin didn't have much money to spare, and wasting money would just be cruel. So I went against Diana, and took a bite. It made me feel even worse that it actually tasted really good. Peanut butter and jelly sandwiches were my ultimate weakness and Robin knew that.

Robin had me finish the whole thing by the time the bus came. Eating that made me feel so damn tired, and had completely ruined my mood. And it didn't make things any better when she forced me to eat lunch, supper and a snack later on in the day. Totalling at 2100 calories!! 2100!!! I was going to be gaining weight for sure now!!

By the end of the day I was furious with Robin. One day of eating "normal" was ok. Everyone fucked up every now and then. But two days in a row? Possible even multiple more days in a row?? This wasn't ok! But no matter what I argued, Robin kept pushing for me to eat. She really wasn't going to let this one go. She was determined to keep me stuffed all day long, and that didn't change for a while.

--