When meeting someone, sometimes you know when you may have some type of connection with them, whether it be a negative or positive.

A negative connection makes you feel uncomfortable. It feels as if you are walking on tiptoes just to get through a conversion with them. Silence is unbearable and everything becomes forced and awkward.

For a positive connection, you may feel a tug. A tug where you want to know more. Want to keep engaging and finding similarities. Nothing feels forced, it is comfortable where you can sit there with nothing to say but still talk about everything just by looking at one another.

The scary thing, you don't know if you yourself are a negative or a positive connection to someone. 

And what's even scarier… secrets pour and walls crumble. Vulnerability becomes your best friend and worst enemy.

…………………….

“Lt. Mala, you have a call from your mother on line 4.” Sherry announced on my desk phone intercom.

“Thanks Sherry.” I quickly finished what I was working on, and answered the phone. “Hey Ma.”

“Hey baby!” she sounds very cheerful.

“You sound really good today.” I smile. It makes my heart feel better knowing she is getting better.

“I feel good, baby. What about you? How is life with a partner? It's been what a month now?”

I sigh and rub the bridge of my nose, “It's fine. Just… different.”

“Different? How?”

Well, for starters… he is very open. Does not shut up. Literally. He always smiles at me and says cringy and nice things that make me uncomfortable. He wants me to meet his girlfriend.. I mean, The fuck? We aren't friends.

“Ah, just a bit more talkative than I am used to.”

She laughs, “Sounds like me when I met your father. Never shutting up, even when clearly what I am saying makes him uncomfortable.”

I laugh a bit, “Well, what's the reason you called ma? Everything okay?”

“Oh! I actually met with the real estate agent today. We should have the house on the market here soon!”

My smile fades. “That's uh, that's great ma. Anything I can do to help?”

“Actually, when we sell the house, I will need you to get the rest of your stuff and help me pack mine. I'm still finding somewhere new to live but I haven't found any places I like.”

Hearing mom talking about how she is moving on makes me hurt yet I am happy for her.

“That's great ma, but listen I need to finish up here. I will call you soon. I love you.”

“I love you more, sweety. Go save the world or something. Eat a donut and have a cup of coffee.”

I snorted, “Ma, you know I don't eat that shit.”

We laughed and hung up the phone and I sighed. Rubbing my temples, I lay my head on my desk.

“This is the 3rd time you canceled lunch with me.”

I look up at the voice of Chelf. I glance over and see the same face he gave me the first day we ran into each other. Eyebrows pushed together, blonde hair in a messy bun, face red...

“Bridgette, please. We haven't seen each other…” he sighed and rubs his forehead. “Fine. I love you too. Bye.”

I walked over and leaned against his desk. “Rough day?”

He looks up and smirks. “You could say that. My girlfriend canceled lunch with me for the 3rd time. I have not seen her much in the few months I have been here.”

“Ouch. Sorry man.”  I stood there awkwardly. “Well, I guess I’ll get back to work.” I turn to leave and feel his hand catch my arm.

“Actually I was about to leave to get lunch with her, but since she canceled, wanna join me?”

“Uh…” 

“I'll pay.”

I grin, “Sure why not.” A harmless meal won't hurt.

“Great.” He smiled and grabbed his wallet.

We walked out of the office and toward his car. “So where are we going?”

“Ah it's a diner. I think it's called Oliver's.” He said unlocking his car.

“Dude, that's like 3 blocks we can walk.”

“Oh. I didn't know.” he shrugged and closed his car door then locked it. “Show me the way.”

We walked quietly to the diner. We would bump into one another every now and then but for some odd reason, it was a comfortable silence. I don't like it.

We were still quiet when we arrived, and quiet as we were seated. We sat in silence until we ordered our drinks. Why is this so comfortable yet, awkward.

“Ever been here before?” Chelf asked while looking at the menu as we got situated.

“Yeah, I used to eat here all the time about a year ago.”

“Oh really why is that?” he asked looking up.

“Oh the po boys are really good. My favorite is the spicy chicken.” Naw, I gorged myself here after the break up.

“Hmm. I think I'll get the shrimp po boy.”

We ordered and sat in silence until our food came. Of course it looks delicious as usual. Good pick Chelf.

“Dude.” I looked up and saw him making a very… sexual face. “Okay, that's almost better than sex.”

I smiled, “Told ya.”

“So what more can you tell me? You obviously know food. Tell me more about you.”

“Like what? There's not much to tell,” I bit into my sandwich. Yep still just as good.

“Why not play 20 questions and whatever you ask you have to answer.”

I rolled my eyes. “What are we high school girls?”

He gave me a smile.

I grinned back. “Shoot.”

“Okay, how old are you?” he takes another bit of his sandwich.

“I'm 27. You?”

“25.”

I ate a few fries, “Uhm. How long have you been on the force?”

“3 Years. I started in Mane, then transferred here when I met Bridgette.”

“ 7 years for me. Joined straight out of high school.”

“Do you have a military background?” he asked, placing his sandwich down.

I looked at him, “Sadly no. I wanted to join the Air Force, but my eyesight was not to their standards.” I waved my hand in front of my face as if I was blind. “I wear contacts but my glasses are like granny glasses. Thick as fuck. Besides, my girlfriend at the time hated the idea and shot it down real quick.”

Chelf laughed and nodded. “Well, it was not her decision to make,” He took a bite of his sandwich, “Anyways, I wear readers sometimes. Depending on font size. Anything under 14, cant see it. But I do have a military background. I joined the Army out of high school.”

“Is there a reason for so soon?” When he didn't answer I glanced at him. His face was frowning and his face looked sad. “Ah, sorry if that was a bit personal.” He hummed but didn't respond. Maybe it's a topic for another day. I froze. Another day? Dude, you're already in a bit more than you normally are. Stop. 

We sit in silence for a moment. The tension in the air could be cut by a knife. I coughed, “Uhm, You turn.”

He took another bite out of his sandwich thinking. “Favorite thing to do?”

“I love to bike.”

“As in like cycling?”

“Yep. It started less than a year ago. I had a rough break up with my ex girlfriend, and the fridge became my best friend. I put on over 100lbs in less than two months. And when I finally snapped out of my spiral, I hated myself. So I went to the gym, found out I hated weight lifting. So I tried a cycling class. Never looked back. Dropped the weight, and viola.” I gestured to myself.

“Ah, I get that. When I was a kid, my relationship with my dad was.. Rough. Hint why the military. Anyways, I lifted weights to ease my mind. So I understand where you are coming from. Any ways, what happened between you and your ex?”

I froze mid bite. 

I looked up at him. “C...can this not be one of the questions please. It's still a tough subject for me. Besides, you need to answer your question.”

“Okay. That's fine. No pressure,” he thought for a second. “I like to hike. I'm originally from Tennessee, so we have the mountains. On weekends we would go hiking. Me and my mom and dad. Then he left.”

I gave him a sympathetic look. “By choice or…”

“Choice. He left when I was about 17. Said he didn't want to continue a fake marriage with my mom. So he up and left. He wanted to stay in contact with me after I turned 18, but I didn't want to. So he stopped trying.”

I pondered for a minute. “Well, what about now? Why not reach out to him. He may have stopped because he knew you wanted space, not that he didn't want you.”

“I'm not going to push to talk about your ex, so don't push about my dad.” he said with a growl.

I put my hands up and surrendered. “Sorry. It's just… the night we ran into one another my mom told me that she was selling my childhood home. My dad and her bought it with everything they had at the time. He helped me after my break up, and he was the main reason I came out of my funk,” I laid my head on my hand and leaned on the table, “He was my best friend.”

“Was?” I hear Chelf ask.

“Yea, was.” My mind slowly slipped into the last memory I have of my dad.