Blaire Hawthorne describes himself as a ‘twenteen’ year old Filipino horror author who’s too scared of everything and anything to be taken seriously. Blaire’s works have had a lot of success on Webnovel, and now Blaire has launched his works on Tapas as well. We sat down with Blaire to talk about novel-writing and creation.

You’re a well-read author, and I know you have many inspirations for your work from Nabokov to Stoker to Jose P. Rizal. What’s one book that you keep returning to over and over again to re-read and why does it keep pulling you back?

Lolita by Vladimir Nabokov. I loved how this book made an otherwise simple but depraved story into a complex piece. I aspire to make a story like this in the future.

Dracula by Bram Stoker, a mandatory read for horror writers, in my opinion.

House of Leaves by Mark Z. Danielewski, this book alone is the reason why I wrote Megachurch the way it is now.

Boyhood by Charlie Samuya Veric, this book told me that you can be who you want to be.

El Filibusterismo/The Reign of Greed by Jose P. Rizal. It talks about the hopelessness of fighting against your oppressors and the tragedy of being powerless in a system made to silence you. The book singlehandedly created a revolution. ICONIC!

What made you start writing?

Nothing, really. I lived in a dirt-filled, poverty-stricken life where people would rather drink and shout than to read or write. Writing, to me, is just an inherent spirit sleeping inside me ever since I was born. My mother is too busy to teach me, my school is too much of an oppressive place for me to create an interest for writing, and my environment in general is just a place where creativity would never be fostered. But I still somehow started writing when I was just a little caterpillar, and I'm still writing now that I'm a blue butterfly!

Writing, to me, is femininity. I was raised a boy, I grew up as a boy, I went through my childhood in preparation for my manhood, but femininity still came to me, and I just lived with that. Writing is just who I am.

Megachurch is an interesting novel and not like many that are found on Tapas. Can you tell us a bit more about it?

So, Megachurch. At first it might seem like a critique of religion, but really it's not. It's more about the "mega" rather than the "church." Style wise, my inspiration is House of Leaves and Dracula while the story itself in an amalgamation of many, many stories.

But I guess my biggest inspiration is life itself. I know, too cheesy! But our reality truly is humanity's greatest story. Megachurch is inspired of how capitalists used Pride to sell products at a higher price because it has rainbow on it. Megachurch is inspired of how identity and trauma is used to make you subscribe to a premium membership. Megachurch is inspired of how much people will use what makes you an individual so you could be loyal to their brand. In a biblical sense, Megachurch is inspired of how Jesus threw capitalists out of his temple because they're using god to sell and swindle. Megachurch is about how the capitalists uses a group's identity to sell merch.

TL; DR: Megachurch is inspired of the capitalists' exploitation of identity.

How does your identity interplay with the novels you write? Especially as you’ve chosen to write in the horror genre, was there any particular reason for that?

My identity has many driving factors for the themes I write. I talk about identity and capitalism a lot, even though I'm not really that passionate about either! I feel like I would be writing completely different things if I weren't a part of the LGBTQ+ community. Of course, I talk a lot about my experience more, and that involves a lot of gay things I had been through! I have 0 idea how to ‘act straight’, so I have no idea how to write those, and I think it shows!

And I felt like queer identity as a theme for a horror novel has never been tapped enough in literature, even though LGBTQ+ people experience all sorts of horror in their day-to-day life--starting from their homes and ends to the streets. It just saddens me that the best way we can truly read horror stories now where LGBTQ+ identity is the focal point is through biographies.

See, I am not a very optimistic person. I think it's scary how people look at queer people these days, especially when big companies started to cash in on it. I feel like everyone's identity is now being used as a commodity. This very freedom we fought for is the very same reason why companies are now earning billions. I think that's scary. And I wanna write about that. Hopefully, other people shares my same fear.

What things do you wish platforms or websites would do to support LGBTQ creators?

I say this sentiment directly to platforms, websites, and brands: Don't use the LGBTQ+ movement as a commodity to earn your dough if you're not really supporting the movement. Identity and expression is not a commercial. Your support is great enough and allowing LGBTQ+ voice to thrive in your platform is already a huge support for us. But you don't need to sell a T-shirt with words saying, "We support the gays!" to be a part of our cause. That's helping YOU, not the community.

What is the representation that you’re dying to see?

I just want to see more LGBTQ+ bad guys. I know this might not be a popular opinion, but I want to see them DONE RIGHT for once! I want to see LGBTQ+ villains who aren't bad because they're gay or whatever. One of my main characters is a trans woman who clashed with my other main character due to political differences, so she became the villain in his POV. And I see no problem with that! No, really. It's okay to make LGBTQ+ villains. But, like every character ever, do it right.

We can actually make LGBTQ+ villains due to reasons that made sense and not because 'gay man bad.' It's okay to make your gay, lesbian, transgender character the villain of the story. It's really, really okay to do that. Just DO. IT. RIGHT. Be thoughtful about it. We don't want to see another Baron Harkonnen. Be original. Red gay Satan gets old really fast. People love how iconic Frank-N-Furter is, but I just feel like people are too afraid of making queer-coded villains because they're afraid of being labelled as homophobic, biphobic, or transphobic. I just feel like this silence is just as harming to the community as any other form of silence is.

And I will FLIP if I see another one of those 'straight gay' people who are only gay for this one person because it wouldn't be good TV if they're shown being too gay. I don't ask them to make promiscuous and effeminate characters to make them gay (that's also a huge problem), but don't make them literally just a straight person who so happens to be in love with the person of the same sex.

What’s the best thing about being a webnovelist?

Having a platform to speak out my mind as freely as I can without any men-in-black out there to stop me is actually more than enough of a positive experience for me. The existence of platforms that allows me to be who I am without reservation and to reach out to people who hopefully like the content I produce is already a huge step from where I was years ago.

The friends and other LGBTQ+ people and allies who understand me and my thoughts while also respecting my art form and the stories I make is 100% the biggest positive thing I've ever experienced, and this happened to me very recently. I've met a lot of great people whom I adore and respect simply because of my passion. It's funny how the most thoughtful, kindest, and respectful people I've met are those who are otherwise viewed as blasphemous and disgusting in the past and in other current cultures. The love I've received as an LGBTQ+ creator for just being frank and straightforward is more than anything I could have ever asked for, and it makes me so much prouder of who I am and the people with me.