But it didn’t take, as Eddie had known it wouldn’t. His mother loved a good party. And the lure of actually meeting Eddie’s friends was too sweet for her to let go.
Eddie could acknowledge the fact that he was freaking out. For once, he really would like a cigarette, but there was never a stone-faced, black-cotton wearing mute around when you needed one.
He was walking towards the flat. He’d had a whole three days since Cress had sent an email with the message that she hadn’t been able to gracefully decline the invitation. The only vaguely silver lining was that most of the team wouldn’t be able to go, since they had their own family commitments. But it would have been far too much to ask that the core team would have other plans. Laurel and Bren and Christian wouldn’t have gone home anyway, and naturally Richards and Cress would be there. The only others were Em and Strawberry, who had said they would come but only stay the one night, instead of all three.
So Eddie had to face the horrifying fact that his friends and his family would be mingling for three days and nights. The thought filled him with horrified terror. Keeping his worlds apart had never been a problem before.
Again, he blamed Altruism.
If they ever found out who Eddie really was, it would be all be over. The Great Show, the fun vacation of college. The merry carefree life of Eddie.
He was spared the immediate threat of having to face Laurel and her glee because of the opening, which took enough of Eddie’s time to be legitimately absent, but he could feel her eyeballing his back, and the glimpse of triumph hanging around the corners of her mouth. On the night itself, he found that beyond actually organising the thing and making sure it ran smoothly, he couldn’t find the enjoyment in it he’d been anticipating. The heaviness of dread was too present. When Bren asked what was eating him, he laughed it off and said he was tired, knowing it was a feeble lie but unable to think of something else.
Em found him at the bench that had become his habitual retreat in recent months. Since they had restarted their acquaintance, their odd little meetings had become so familiar to him now that he half expected to see Em there before he arrived. Though Eddie never banked on it. Em wasn’t very predictable beyond the fact that he always had a smoke available.
“Have I ever mentioned how odd it is, that you come here to smoke with me?”
“I can leave.” Em replied.
“Then where would I get my nicotine fix?” Eddie remarked, trying for levity but it came out sour.
Em didn’t leave though. He never sat down but always stood next to the bench where Eddie sat with his legs crossed and one hand buried deep in his pocket, because the cold was really biting now, especially at night. Eddie had forgone the suit he’d planned to wear for the night in favour of skinny jeans, a warm cotton top and sheep's wool lined jacket, to protect against the chill. He breathed deeply anyway, letting the crisp air enter his lungs and whoosh out again, carelessly letting the cigarette turn to ash in his hand.
“Sorry for wasting it.” Eddie said, tapping the long ash off and stubbing it out.
Em didn’t reply to that, and Eddie glanced at him. “Thank you, though.”
“What’s bugging you?” Em rumbled.
Eddie fisted his hands in his pockets. Em was, as usual, annoyingly perceptive. Although even Brendan had noticed something was up. Eddie wished he could conjure up his buoyant façade, but it kept sliding away, and keeping it up was getting harder.
“I’m not too excited about you all attending Thanksgiving with my family.” Eddie huffed out eventually.
Em didn’t react, so Eddie assumed he had known this already. “Would you prefer me not to come?”
Eddie laughed. “I’d prefer all of you not to come.”
“I can say no.”
Eddie felt a half-hearted smile arrive and fall off his face. A quirky reply was not forthcoming. And if Em had offered this when he had first found out the news, he would have taken it gladly, Eddie found he wasn’t too eager for it now. The calm bubble of silence Em carried around with him felt like something he might need, when the time came.
“Uh...no. It’s done now after all. They have the guest bedroom made up and everything.”
“A month in advance.”
“My mother would leave nothing to chance.” Eddie said wryly. “She loves any opportunity for a soiree.”
-8-
TBC
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