The week passed and Friday arrived again. Sarah had avoided Castiel all week, but it didn’t make her happy. Every time she looked away or turned on her heels and headed to another direction, her heart ached more, and the dark clouds in her head got heavier. She felt terrible. Arthur noticed her bad mood, but she didn’t want to talk about it with him. She just wanted to forget. It’d best for everyone.
Castiel and Leon were spending their lunch break in the basement which they usually used for their band practice if music room wasn’t free. They were sitting on the floor, leaning against the cold wall. Neither had said a single word.
Leon observed his friend with concern. Castiel had been on a terrible mood for the whole week. Their band training hadn’t worked out either and it had made things worse. Sarah and Castiel hadn’t talked all week, and this was the result. They were both miserable.
“So, you don’t talk with her anymore?” he asked. Castiel turned to look at him.
“With who?”
“Sarah of course.”
“Not really. But the project is over so why would we need to talk?”
“I dunno. Maybe because you like her?”
Castiel stayed silent for a long while.
“I do like her. But I don’t know what she thinks. She’s hard to figure out.”
“I’m pretty sure she likes you too.”
“Really? She’s avoided me all week.”
“She might just be shy. I think she likes you, based on what I’ve seen. You should ask. Dawdling doesn’t solve anything.”
“Are you giving me relationship advice? You took ages to make a move with Amanda.”
Leon blushed slightly.
“I know. Which is why you shouldn't do the same. She won’t wait forever.”
“I know, I know.” Arthur would probably make his move soon. Castiel was convinced the guy had his eyes on Sarah. “I just… I don’t know what to do. I tried on Monday, but I couldn’t say anything sensible. I think I pushed her away. I’m such a coward.”
“So, are you gonna wait that Sarah makes the move? Because I think she thinks you aren’t interested. You’re drifting apart.”
“I know! It’s killing me, but I don’t know why I can’t do anything. I want to do something but I… Maybe I’m scared the same thing will happen than with Rachel.”
Castiel leaned his head against the wall. He had thought he had got over that break up but apparently it still haunted him. He considered himself quite self-confident but just thinking about Sarah made him crumble into a pile of uncertainty and doubt. Was he good enough for her?
“She isn’t Rachel though,” Leon reminded. It was hard to see his friend like this. Castiel had supported him when he struggled with his feelings towards Amanda. He wanted to help the same way now.
“I like Sarah,” Leon continued, “she’s kind and nice, a level-headed person. Amanda thinks she’s cool as well. Definitely nothing like Rachel.” While Rachel had been more like Castiel; bold, independent and stubborn, she had also been impudent and selfish. Leon was sure Sarah could or would never hurt Castiel the same way Rachel had.
“You’re probably right. Sarah isn’t the same as her,” Castiel said.
“You should make your move, honestly. You have nothing to lose but everything to gain.”
“Wow, you’re getting poetic, aren’t you?” Castiel grinned.
“Well, I am a songwriter. Poetry is basically my second name.”
“But you’re right. Nothing will come out of it if I just wait. I’m gonna talk to her today. I don’t think I can take another weekend without knowing what’s going on.”
Leon patted his friend on the shoulder. “It will go well. Me and Amanda are cheering for you.”
Thanks,” Castiel smiled. He was sure he’d need the support.
The last class of the day finally ended. Sarah swiftly packed her history book and notes in her bag. Other students gathered in their friend groups to discuss their weekend plans. Sarah’s plan was to go home and study, maybe watch a movie or two, and then study more.
“Sarah.”
Sarah was closing the zipper on her bag but froze on the spot. She felt a tingle of nervousness run down her spine. She straightened herself and turned to look at Castiel.
“Yes?”
“I… I’d like to talk. Do you have time?”
Sarah’s heart started beating faster.
“I have.”
“Cool. Maybe we could talk outside?”
“Sure.”
Castiel hurried outside. His face was burning red. He needed time to mentally prepare himself. He hadn’t expected Sarah to agree so easily. What on Earth would he do now?
Sarah finished packing and headed out of the classroom. Her heart drummed in her chest. Was it a mistake to talk with Castiel? What if she got her hopes up for nothing? But it would be nice to be able to talk with him. All this avoiding made her uncomfortable. Maybe they could still be friends. She could forget her feelings. Probably. Leon and Amanda watched her go. They hoped everything would work out. It was painful to watch Castiel and Sarah do nothing to their feelings. It hit too close to home.
Sarah hastily buttoned her coat and walked outside. She noticed Castiel leaning on the wall next to the doors. A little smiled climbed on Sarah’s face. Castiel spotted her and perked up. As they walked across the school yard side by side, they caught the attention of the other students.
The silence lasted until they got out of the school gates. The biggest crowd of students dispersed, and they had more privacy for talking. Sarah focused on the pavement to keep her head and heart calm. Sometimes their arms brushed against each other, and every time Sarah nearly jumped out of her skin, like her body had been electrified. Castiel looked at her, gathering courage and trying to figure out what to say. Maybe it’d be too straightforward to blurt out everything right away. They hadn’t talked in a while so it could be weird.
“Umm, would you like to come for a walk?” he asked. “With me and Ares?”
“Oh? Umm, well…”
“Ares misses you a lot.”
“I guess in that case I have to,” Sarah smiled. “I miss Ares too.” And you, she wanted to add but didn’t have the courage. She was happy Castiel had asked her. Maybe he didn’t hate her.
“Do you want to come right now?” Castiel’s heart thumped in his chest. Please say yes, please say yes.
“Sure.”
“Nice.”
And they fell silent again, but the air around them wasn’t as heavy anymore. They were both able to breathe more freely and relax a bit.
They got to Castiel’s house. She quickly glanced at the upstairs window that belonged to Castiel’s room. Her stomach tingled. She decided to wait outside. The snowy yard calmed her nerves.
“Oh, do you want to leave your bag here? So, you don’t have to carry it around?” he asked at the door.
“That’d be easier.” Sarah jogged to Castiel and gave him the bag after taking out her phone.
“I have to warn you that Ares might come with force. I might not be able to hold him.”
“It’s alright. I’ll brace myself,” Sarah smiled. Castiel returned the smile and unlocked the door.
Sarah backed a few steps so Ares wouldn’t jump on her straight from top of the stairs. She heard barking and scratching behind the door. She took a deep breath.
When the door creaked open, a black snout immediately pushed it ajar. The door slammed against the wall, and Ares dashed out. Sarah’s heart jumped to her throat. Castiel tried to hold on the leash but it slipped from his hands.
“Watch out!” he shouted when Ares charged towards Sarah.
She jumped to the side and managed to avoid the collision. Ares tried to stop but slid on the snow. When he finally stopped, he spun around and ran towards Sarah again.
“Stoooop!” Sarah shouted while lifting her hands and closing her eyes. Ares skidded on the snow and tumbled against Sarah nearly knocking her out of balance. It took him a second to recover, and Ares started to wiggle and squirm around Sarah’s legs, trying to jump up to lick her face. Sarah couldn’t hold her laugh when she crouched and got her face covered in wet kisses.
“Oh, did you miss me? I missed you too,” she said and tried to avoid Ares’s tongue getting in her mouth. She grabbed his head between her hands so she could breath for a second. Ares stared at her with tongue licking air, trying to reach Sarah’s face. He nudged forward, knocking Sarah on the ground.
“Silly boy. Stop it,” she laughed and tried to cover her face when another barrage of kisses started.
Castiel’s sharp whistle got Ares’s attention and he jogged to his owner. Sarah was panting as she stood up. She wiped her face on her coat sleeves. Her heart drummed in her chest, but in a good way. She was happy to see Ares. The dog sat at Castiel’s feet, tail wagging the ground clean from snow.
“Are you okay?” Castiel asked after picking up the snow-covered leash from the ground.
“Yeah. Slobbered but fine,” Sarah smiled.
“That’s good.”
Castiel was happy Sarah and Ares still got along so well, maybe even better than before. In perhaps a weird way it gave Castiel confidence. If Ares liked Sarah this much, she had to be a good person. The dog had never been a huge fan of Rachel. It had taken a good while for him to warm up towards the girl even though Rachel had really liked Ares.
“Shall we go then?” Castiel asked.
Sarah nodded and they headed to the familiar park. Castiel hadn’t been there often during the past week. It had somehow felt odd to go there alone, even though he and Ares had visited the park regularly before meeting Sarah. Instead, they had been doing a lot of running, trying to get rid of all the extra energy Ares had and the frustration and anxiousness that built up in Castiel when he welled in his thoughts about Sarah.
The walk to the park passed in silence as many times before. They both wanted to talk but couldn’t find the words. Talking became harder the closer to the park they got, and in the end, they just sat on the bench quietly while Ares ran around and brought sticks he found to Sarah. She tried to have a little tug with Ares for the stick, but the dog easily beat her and ran around celebrating victory. Castiel watched the play amused. He was happy to see Sarah smiling. The past week, every time he had seen her, Sarah had looked sad and lonely. It had grated his heart but the courage to talk to her had been missing. It avoided him even now, when he had the perfect opportunity to talk without being interrupted.
Castiel heard approaching voices of people and noticed a group with four dogs walking to the park. Two women walked standard sized salt & pepper coloured Schnauzers while the men, husbands or boyfriends of the women Sarah guessed, had a black Labrador Retriever and a Dalmatian. They stopped at the gate as they noticed Ares and glanced at each other. Ares tensed up as well when he noticed these people. His ears perked up and tail wagged. Castiel clipped his dog in the leash.
“Come in. We’re leaving,” he said and stood up. He pulled Ares behind the bench while the group walked towards them. All four dogs barked at them and pulled against their leashes while Ares stared at them intensely and wagged his tail furiously. Few times he tried to get closer to them but Castiel’s had of tight grip of the leash. When the dogs and their owners had almost walked past, Ares let out one loud bark. The women flinched and tugged the leashes of their still shouting dogs. The man with the Dalmatian looked at Castiel. Castiel returned the look, almost like he was challenging the man to say something, but the man remained silent and followed his friends, pulling his barking dog along.
“Let’s go,” Castiel said to Sarah, who still sat on the bench. She jumped up and followed Castiel.
Sarah glanced back at the park gate and saw the women staring at their direction. When Ares and Castiel got to the street, they let their dogs off their leashes to play.
“Did you see them?” Castiel scoffed as they continued their walk. “Oh no, there’s a big scary Rottweiler. Our precious babies can’t come in. They might get eaten,” he said with a high-pitched voice.
“Ares behaved better than any of them,” Sarah said. He had been standing so patiently while the others barked at him.
“I know right? But they don’t notice that. I bet they’re talking right now how the horrible dog barked at their darlings.”
“Well they’re stupid then. Ares is a good dog.”
“It pisses me off when people judge him just because he’s a Rottie. Those rat looking dogs, chihuhauhaus or whatever the fuck they’re called are way worse. They’re pure, concentrated evil.”
Sarah couldn’t hold back a laugh. She didn’t like those dogs either. They made her uncomfortable with the constant shivering and their bulging eyes that looked like they might pop out at any moment. Some of the ones she had seen looked like they might sink their teeth to the nearest person at any moment.
“It’s just ridiculous how they overbreed some dogs. So many breeds where you can’t find a single healthy dog, or at least need do some serious searching for one. They’re basically born with health issues and still people buy them and think they’re amazing. It’s disgusting. Don’t they care about the well-being of the animal at all? Like, bulldogs for example sound like they might stop breathing after walking a bit, I doubt they could fight against a single bull anymore. They probably collapse if they have to climb stairs. And if you see pictures of the original bulldogs, you wouldn’t recognise them as the same breed anymore. They’ve changed so much because humans are idiots and can’t do anything in moderation. Everything has to be ruined by overdoing it. I mean sure, rottweilers have some health issues too, I won’t deny it but they’re still healthy breed compared to all these ‘adorable babies’ people carry in their handbags and dress up in stupid clothes.” Castiel finished his talk with an annoyed huff. He was slightly embarrassed about this random outburst about dogs.
“You’re right. I don’t really know much about dogs, but I don’t like seeing all the ones with short snouts and big eyes. They don’t look very happy.”
Castiel nodded along. He agreed. He might’ve just imagined it, but he felt like the dogs had this suffering look in their eyes, especially if they were unlucky enough to have short snout and really big eyes. Usually they went hand in hand, but some breeds leaned more towards one or the other. Castiel felt sorry for those dogs.
Before Castiel realized, they had arrived back to his house. The walk was over. He hadn’t been able to talk about what he wanted to. While Castiel was slightly more confident that things went better with Sarah, he didn’t want to push this back any longer. There was a chance he couldn’t muster more courage and waiting for another day was risky.
“Umm, would you like to come in for a bit?” he asked as they stopped at the front door.
“I don’t know… It’s getting a bit late,” Sarah said. The nervousness started to build up in her again.
“For a little while? Ares would like it.”
And like he wanted to help Castiel, Ares nudged himself against Sarah’s legs and looked at her with his big brown eyes. Sarah couldn’t help but smile.
“Maybe for a little while,” she said.
Castiel smiled as he opened the door and they walked in.
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