The next day, Peters got a call from the Corporal on Reception. “I have Captain Hayes here, requesting to see you for a moment if possible.”

“Certainly, send him up.”

Hayes came in looking apologetic. “Sorry to bother you, sir. Can I talk to you for a few minutes, unofficially? It’s just that you’re the only person I can talk to about this.”

“Of course, Hayes, come in and have a seat.” Peters got up and came around his desk to one of the three chairs grouped around a small table that he used for casual meetings. He set the privacy seal on his door.

Hayes looked as if he hadn’t slept. “Maybe I’m stupid, but I have no idea what Danyel wants me to do. I don’t even know if he likes me anymore. Sometimes I think he hates me. This is all so new to me, I don’t know what I’m doing wrong. Last night, he got really angry with me when I apologised, I thought I was doing the right thing but obviously not.”

Peters considered for a moment, trying to walk the thin line between interfering and offering help. He was also extremely conscious of not betraying either man’s trust. “I don’t want to tell you what to do, but—. It sounds to me as if you’ve tied yourself up in knots, trying too hard to rationalise everything, and please everybody else. Perhaps it’s as simple as being true to yourself. Sort out what are the most important things in your life and then pursue them. I’m not saying it will be easy—simple can be hard—but at least you’ll have a clear purpose instead of this... this almighty fuckup!”

He smiled and Hayes gave a reluctant laugh. “You’ve got that part right!” He thought for a moment. “I think that actually makes sense. Maybe I just need to think it through, one step at a time.” He stood up and shook Peters by the hand, “Thank you, Peters. You’ve been very kind to me. I hope I’ll see you again in the future.”

“I’ll see you at your wedding, won’t I?” Peters asked deliberately.

Hayes winced involuntarily, and caught himself. “You know what? I don’t think you will!”

“Be true to yourself.”

The first decision Hayes made, was that he had to cancel his marriage. He was sorry to let Fiona down but it wasn’t what he wanted any longer, and he didn’t think he would be able to meet her expectations in any case. Not now he had been with Danyel. He was the only one he wanted to have sex with. He started the long difficult process by arranging a meeting with the heads of both families; Ser Becker and his sister Serra Becker, his own grandmother and his uncle.

He began by asking them all if they were happy with the contracts that had been negotiated. They all smiled and agreed that they were, providing the perfect opening for him to slip into.

“You don’t know how glad I am to hear that. There’s no reason then to change them too much, because I have something rather difficult to tell you.” He looked at his grandmother, wondering for the millionth time whether he should have told her separately, but they had never been particularly close.

“I’m withdrawing from the marriage. I won’t be marrying Fiona.” He waited for all the exclamations and protests to subside and then said, “Officially, the reason is that I’ve changed my mind and decided that it’s unfair to ask Fiona to be the wife of a Patrol captain. The truth is that it’s not appropriate for me to marry any woman. I’m homosexual. I’m telling you the true reason in private, but it’s possible it may become public. If it does, we’ll just have to deal with it.”

He looked at Ser Becker who seemed frozen with shock. “I’ve already told Fiona. She was kind enough to offer to continue with the marriage but I’ve decided it’s not fair to either of us.” It went downhill from there but Hayes stuck to his guns and politely but firmly refuted all suggestions that he should get counselling, get religion or take a new experimental drug for impotence. His grandmother had come up with that one. Unexpectedly, his uncle came to his aid and eventually he managed to convince them all he was in earnest.

“There’s no point going over this again. If Adam tells us he’s homosexual, then he is. Better to know now than after the wedding, I would think!” He looked around at the others. “I agree with him that the contracts we have negotiated are good ones, worth keeping whether the marriage goes ahead or not; there are clear benefits for all of us. Are we agreed?”

At long last the meeting ended and Hayes was able to escape, thanking his uncle on his way out. “Ah well,” his uncle said softly, “Don’t tell your grandmother, but your cousin Dean thinks he might be an om as well. It must run in the family.” He winked. Hayes felt considerably cheered. Perhaps there was someone in his family he could relate to after all.

Then he cancelled the wedding.

The actual process took several days, there were hundreds of people to be contacted and many required a personal communication from him. Fiona refused to take his call; she had evidently been told the news by her father and was coldly furious. He stuck to his prepared story that he’d simply changed his mind, but it didn’t take long for the rumours to start. His favourite was the one that he’d joined an ancient religious cult and decided to become a monk. How anyone thought that would be possible as a Captain of a P-112 space ship was beyond him.

As soon as he’d got the formal notifications and arrangements out of the way, he was going to visit Danyel. He wanted to give him the news in person.

Danyel King heard the news from Peters. Peters had received one of the standard communications Hayes sent to everyone whose invitation had been due to their positions, rather than a personal connection to the couple.

When he heard that Simon was cancelling his wedding, Danyel felt jubilant. Yes! Now Simon would tell him that he wanted him. He waited, trying not to be too impatient. The hours passed in agonising silence. Finally, a whole day later, his wristcom lit up with a message. Feeling a stab of disappointment—after all, he had hoped Simon would come in person—he read it. “Transfer successful. Please report to P108 Samal at 14:00 tomorrow. Major Paterson, Patrol HQ.”