"A bathroom tap, you say."

Nakamura struggled to keep the formal smile on his face. Kojima Yoru looked him over with those arresting grey-and-pink eyes, completely unconvinced. "That's quite a nasty bruise for a mere bump into the tap while spitting out toothpaste," Yoru said. "I'd know. I'm an expert in bruises."

"I was dancing, too," Nakamura said, ears on fire as he dug himself a deeper hole. He'd been so shocked at being asked about his bruise that he'd spat out the first sequence of words his brain put together. "...right," said Yoru, raising an eyebrow.

"Ah! I'll take that." Nakamura grabbed the bag of clothes Yoru had been reaching for. "You're not supposed to be straining yourself."

Today was the day Yoru got discharged, five days after Kei had found him beaten senseless by his father. Much to Miriko's irritation, Kei had spent all those days at Yoru's side, going home only at night to sleep. He'd wanted to take Yoru home too, but work had called him away, prompting him to leave behind his second-in-command to take Yoru home. Nakamura had also been instructed to stay with the Kojimas until Yoru moved into his new home to ensure that no more accidents happened.

The ride home was understandably awkward. They'd never been formally introduced to each other until today. What little Nakamura knew of his friend's fiance came from Kei's gushing, and the infatuated oaf hadn't been lying. There was elegance in every movement of Yoru's, and it took only one glance at him to sense the tremendous personal strength he had. And while he was no model, he was still a very beautiful man who carried his albinism with panache.

"Er, Kei told me you weren't good with strange men," Nakamura said, trying to make conversation. "But you don't need to worry about me. I have a wife and two little girls."

"Oh! I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable, I am fine with you," Yoru said with a small smile.

"Really? Even though we only met today?"

"Kei wouldn't assign the responsibility for my safety to an unscrupulous character."

Nakamura smiled to himself. Yoru might not reciprocate Kei's growing affection, but he did hold Kei in the regard the alpha deserved. "Thank you," Nakamura responded, and it wasn't just for Yoru's trust in him.

"You said you had two girls. I was surprised - you look really young."

Nakamura's smile grew into a proud grin. "Oh, they're still toddlers," he said. "My eldest is three, and the little one is just eighteen months old."

"Wow. Lucky you. I'm sorry you have to stay away from them for so long because of me."

"It's alright, my wife understands. The job calls for long periods of time away from home."

Yoru shifted in his seat, suddenly uncomfortable. His baseless fear of all good things going away hit him in full force, and now he was worried that if Kei left, he wouldn't come back. "Er, Mr. Nakamura," he said, "when you have to leave for a job, how dangerous is it, usually?"

"Worried about Kei?"

"I know danger comes with the job, but I'm unable to come to terms with it nevertheless. Besides, I'm scared of being alone."

Nakamura nodded in understanding. "We're a pretty small, nondescript group," he said, "so we usually don't run into serious trouble. Well - we were, but Kei's expanding. Recently, our territory tripled and numbers doubled. Naturally, that means making enemies. But Kei's cautious and conciliatory by nature, so it's not as bad as, say, Ito."

The house was silent when they arrived. Miriko was staying with her aunt to recover her nerves and Yoru's father had pulled one of his week-long disappearing acts. After an awkward welcome, Yoru pointed Nakamura's room out to him and settled onto the couch to read. Nakamura had barely put down his bag when his phone rang and his worrywart boss's name showed up on screen.

"Everyone's in one piece," Nakamura drawled without any greetings.

"Please keep it that way," Kei responded. "There's only eight days left, but it feel like a lifetime."

"Don't worry, Kei. I won't let this slip from your hands."

God knew he'd allowed enough to slip away. As Kei's childhood friend, he'd seen Kei grow up into a gentle, simple, ordinary guy with a skill set as far removed from the oyabun's seat as a pig was from the Prime Minister's. He'd carved out his own door to the civilian world and had a bright future ahead of him. And all Nakamura had done was watch as Kei had thrown it all away in a heartbeat. All his friendships, his professional network, a beautiful girlfriend he'd adored - everything was gone in an instant. 

It was tragic, really, to have thrown everything away only to die a criminal.

"...mura? Hey! Nakamura! Did you fall asleep?"

Nakamura jumped. "No, I'm here," he said. "How did the talk with Suda go?"

"He wasn't expecting me to show up with an invite."

"Don't tell me we could've not invited him and been fine," Nakamura groaned.

"Of course not. He would have used that as an excuse to fight us in an attempt to recover the port. He still thinks he can weaken my position by showing up at my wedding in front of all our allies, but that's not going to happen."

"Yes, yes, your common enemy strategy. When are you going to tell me what you've been cooking in that brain of yours?"

"You'll see."
*
The Next Day

"Interpol? We're trying to save our group from slaughter, and your bright idea was fucking Interpol?!"

"Calm down," Kei's voice drawled through Nakamura's phone speakers.

"Calm down? Calm down?! You double-crossed your boss's fucking boss!" Nakamura yelled.

"You probably shouldn't announce it to the whole planet," Yoru piped up before turning his attention back to the TV, where a man was being shoved into a police car. "So that's Kei's boss, huh? He's short."

"Boss's boss," Nakamura corrected. "So let me get this straight, Kei. You allowed the biggest shipment of heroin in history to get unloaded at the docks and transported out of our territory, then helped fucking Interpol in their fucking drug bust? They even took the cash we were to be paid as fees!"

"That's actually really smart," Yoru remarked. "I'd have allowed the drugs to reach their distribution center. Once the delivery's done, our job is complete and nobody suspects us."

A long minute of stunned silence followed. "...and that is why I'm marrying him," Kei finally said appreciatively. "Fortunately, my dear, the transporting was not our job this time. We oversaw the unloading and that's the end of it. The suspicion lies within the ranks of my superior's own group."

"And you think that's enough to protect us?" Nakamura asked, irately.

"Well, yes. Because the traitor is within their ranks. Remember what I'd told you about oyabuns betrayed by their wives, Yoru?"

"It was his wife? Really?"

"Yes. She was the one who alerted Interpol. All I did was go up to the agent in charge and tell him I would pretend I knew nothing as long as they conducted their bust after my job was done."

"A house divided, huh," Yoru mumbled thoughtfully. "Dangerous stuff."

"Dangerous indeed. If anyone gets the wind of Kei's antics, he's going to get killed."

Yoru's heart sank. "Right," he said. "Occupational hazard."

"I'll be fine, Yoru," Kei said. "I'm not the traitor, so I'll be fine. It's that woman I'm worried about."

"And what about Suda?" Nakamura asked.

"For him I orchestrated a close shave. Got Miyoshi - that's our computer wizard, Yoru - to mount a very ostentatious, very untraceable attack on all banks where Suda keeps his money. His account numbers were sent to Interpol before the virus was detected and disabled. He didn't lose a dime, but he's on Interpol's radar now and his accounts are frozen temporarily."

"What if someone realizes that Kei is the only thing in common between the attacked groups?" Yoru asked. "And who's Suda?"

"Suda...is Ito's boss," Kei answered hesitantly. "Yoru, I don't -"

"What do you think you're doing?" Yoru snapped harshly. "First Ito, now Ito's boss! Don't bite off more than you can chew. If you get killed because of your recklessness, it's the people left behind who'll suffer."

"Okay, calm down," Nakamura interrupted. "He's doing this to ensure your safety, Yoru. You have a point, but you should also know that Kei never acts without due reason."

"We all need to calm down," Kei observed. "The loan your father took was from one of Suda-gumi's enterprises, Yoru. If his loan sharks attack you again, it will count as an attack on the Tsunoda group and cause preventable violence. That's why I went and informed Suda about our marriage. And as for anyone noticing my being the common factor - these attacks were timed to coincide with Interpol crackdown on the groups in Chugoku and Kansai."

"I still don't see why you had to go after your boss and Suda," Yoru said, a tad sourly.

"Suda wants to come to our wedding," Kei explained. "That's a problem - Suda-gumi is an enemy group. As for my boss's boss - Yasutake-kumichou - he's a scumbag who managed to turn his whole group against him. I simply killed two birds with one stone by putting those two in their place and creating a formidable, common threat. Since I suffered losses too, I have perfectly good reason to offer my wedding as a good guise to discuss this new threat together - which prevents my superiors from doubting my loyalty, which is what Suda wants."

Yoru exchanged an uneasy glance with Nakamura. "I still feel like it's too unsafe," he said. "And it's too late to ask, but is it okay for me to know all this?"

"It is," Nakamura answered. "The oyabun's wife always knows everything about the group's proceedings."

"Hey, you two could afford to compliment me a little, you know," Kei whined. "I did pull of something smart."

Both Yoru and Nakamura rolled their eyes. "This is the moron you're marrying, Yoru," Nakamura said. "There's still eight days left if you want to reconsider."

"Hey!" Kei protested.

"Nah, no wise man passes over such a delicious biscuit," Yoru said. "I'll take my moron, it's okay."

The only sound from the phone was an indistinct gurgle. "There's other biscuits on the market," Nakamura continued. "Tastier, softer, richer, prettier-"

"If you don't shut up, Nakamura, will give you a shiner on the other cheekbone too!"

Nakamura winced. Yoru raised an eyebrow. "Bathroom taps and dancing, huh?" he teased.

"Don't believe a word he says," said Kei as Nakamura began to shuffle out of the living room. "The morning after you were admitted to the hospital, he told me here was a serious issue with the wedding. It nearly gave me a stroke!"

"What issue?"

"He said there was no way for people to tell that he was the best man!"

Yoru's eyes widened in shock before he began to laugh helplessly, gasping occasionally as his ribs hurt. "Come back, Mr. Best Man," he called. "If you get me a few things, I can fix the problem for you!"

"Don't pamper him!"

"You be quiet!" Nakamura reappeared behind Yoru. "Do you know how busy I've been since you two became unavailable? On top of running the group I've had to taste cake and pick flowers and taste cake and check seating arrangements and taste cake and pick ribbons and sample spoonful after spoonful of mushrooms to make sure the damn fungus is the perfect consistency! I've had it with weddings! I'm never being best man again!"

"Good thing you have only one best friend then," Yoru piped, simultaneously cowed and amused.

"Well," Kei said, "if you look at divorce statistics of the country -"

"You be quiet!" Yoru and Nakamura yelled, together.
___
Fungus: Yes, the mushrooms we eat are a fungus. They're related to brewer's yeast, toadstools and the organisms that cause ringworm.

Biscuit: The British ones, not the American ones. Though both are scrumptious.