Sans had a terrible night.
Or morning.
Or evening.
Whenever it was, he fell asleep to more disturbing nightmares.
It was fortunate that Papyrus wasn’t home at that moment. He was sure he screamed. He didn’t want to trouble his uber cool brother more than warranted.
Sans stared at the swirling tornado of trash at the corner. Sighed.
The happy ending won’t last forever.
The trash won’t last forever either.
Sooner or later, he’s just going to be reset back into the Underground.
Again.
He’s aware of that much. A part of him wanted to just stay in bed and give up.
But, the prospect of another nightmare did not sound good.
So Sans moved from the bed to the couch. He lay down there and started his own coping routine: brainstorming.
Pranks.
Jokes.
Puns.
The little stupid things that made his dreary existence more amusing.
Sans being Sans, had a mental roulette of friends in his mind.
Who?
When?
What?
How?
Just watching that wheel spin made him grin.
The result ended with ‘Alphys’, ‘her computer’, ‘rig it to trigger during her anime time’, with ‘Digital Lesser Dog’. Make that image extend its neck until it flooded the screen.
At first he chuckled at himself. Then, it turned into another sigh.
Ah, dammit. It’s the same gimmick.
Can’t believe I’m gonna use that twice in a row.
Bepis.
Eh, whatever. I’m a sad sack of bones anyway.
It’s decided. Sans lifted his pet rock to reveal a hidden ‘memory stick’. The human world’s data science was way ahead of his society, much to his pleasure.
Using one of his many ‘shortcuts’, he snuck into Alphys’ lab. She was not home. Most likely hanging out with Undyne and Papyrus. Though, sometimes she had to perform maintenance on Mettaton.
Her brand new PC was always on. Most of the time it was to torrent subbed anime.
At least Alphys was prudent enough to put all her real work into a different PC. Locked and passworded to prevent prying eyes.
Speaking of prying eyes, it didn’t take long for Sans to figure out that Alphys installed a keylogger.
Heh. Trying to cover your bases, eh?
Not bad.
But it’s still rather… beta.
…Forget about the dog prank. Let’s see what you’ve been writing.
Sans and lazybones go hand in hand. Until a subject piqued his interest. He’d then study that to the fullest, sometimes to the point where he’d retain that skill.
He won’t remember the ‘when’, but he’d remember the ‘what’. Quantum physics was one of them. Now it’s silly programming stuff.
He accessed the keylogger data and started scrolling down the pages. It was full of anime searches, blog posts, review ranting…
Oh, fanfiction about Toriel and Asgore. Always a golden find. Sans decided to wait for the finished result. Now that he knew Alphys’ username, he can search for it at his own leisure.
Then all the funny stuff stopped at one sentence.
‘Legal custody without permission of original parents’.
Sans felt a bead of sweat forming on his bony forehead.
He scrolled down further.
It got worse.
‘Familial Law’.
‘Adoption Process’.
‘Foster family’.
‘Time required to approve new legal rights’.
‘DNA testing’.
‘Self defense laws’.
‘Accidental death laws’.
‘Kidnapping sentence’.
‘How to avoid getting kidnapped’.
He almost lost his ketchup-lined insides at the last line.
Well, shit.
This ain’t Alphys.
Think, Sans. Think.
Put that quantum noggin to use.
The equation ended at ‘Frisk’. Repeat infinite times. The search choices were so blatant, even Papyrus might figure it out.
Sans selected the entire controversial entry by mouse.
Right-click.
Delete.
He was lucky that the keylogger only recorded keyboard strokes.
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