There was a time when I sought every wonder in the world. I wanted to see every sight, taste every food, hear every sound. It was a ridiculous fantasy, but I couldn’t help but dream of the days lost in the clouds. I thought I would give anything to make those fantasies become my reality.

Turns out I was wrong.

When I discovered happiness, I found that I didn’t need those dreams. What I had, what we had, was all that mattered. I could have lived every experience that the world had to offer, but it was trivial compared to our life together. My dreams had been replaced by love and comfort, a blend of reality that followed me to sleep. I loved nothing more than those days from long ago.

I wished I had realized that they could disappear just as quickly. The one I held so dear never fell to teeth or swords but from a cruel turn of fate. When days ago we held each other with abundant affection, it was suddenly gone. I never expected this to happen without warning, without some sign to say our goodbyes. But that’s not always the case, as I learned.

Alone, those happy days turned to ashes. Those expressions of love, those tiny things that I cherished, those comfortable afternoons, our experiences that we never had the chance to face, now gone. My dreams had changed once again, but now they were truly unachievable: I wanted to bring those moments back, to keep our story moving.

As I would learn again, that’s not how things work. Those days I held in my heart were forever gone, and I was stuck with what remained. But still, I couldn’t help my dreams, no matter what reality tried to tell me.

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The air smelt rich. Thick wafts of lavender and cinnamon choked the room filled with smartly dressed guests. Tables with platters of delectable dishes lined both sides of the massive ballroom, adding to the suffocating odor. All around me, men and women were adorned in luscious jewels, glistening suits, and sleek dresses, talking of matters so incomprehensible that it made my head spin. It took my best effort to resist gagging.

Deino and Enyo had disappeared into the crowd, chatting with important people as if they were casual friends. Father had immediately sought out a man in a crisp white suit. I had seen this man before; he’s the head of the most important Dust supplier in all of Remnant, the Schnee Dust Company. Jacques Schnee, my father’s boss. Father works as head of Dust transactions between the borders of Atlas and Mistral, which makes him regular acquaintances with the Dust Company CEO. That’s also why my father has so much Dust in his basement: ‘generous gifts’ to a ‘valuable member’ of the team. No one mentioned the fact that my father is enraptured by a renowned Huntress whose whole career is heavily dependant on Dust, and these ‘generous gifts’ have led to free access of limitless amounts rivaled by no other Huntress or Huntsmen.

It was the girl behind Jacques that took me by surprise. I had never seen her before, but her white hair and expensive dress with the Schnee motif instantly identified her as Jacques’s daughter. What was her name again? I believe it’s Winter, or at least that’s what I heard my father say one time. From what I could tell, she’s about my age, give or take a year or two. What’s her life like? Does she live in euphoric bliss from her father’s luxurious wealth? How much does she smile while her father loves her, laughing all the while? Does she sleep soundly in a cozy bed every night and dream without a worry? How come she got so lucky to be in such an important, respected family? Why does she get to have money, reputation, and a whole family? Why does she get that? I can see her father smiling while bringing her closer. Why does she get love like that when I… It’s unfair.

Winter’s eyes found a spot near the far end of the ballroom. An expression somewhere between disappointment and fright flickered over her features before quickly being restored. I followed her gaze to a table topped with various wines and champagnes. Outside of the usual crowd, a woman bearing a striking resemblance to Winter was downing a glass of deep red liquid. Then another. When she finally set the glass down, two bottles had been emptied.

I returned to Winter, whose eyes had never left the woman that was now swaying as she walked. The young girl looked to her father, who made a subtle movement with his hand. A server offered Miss Schnee his arm, guiding her out of the ballroom. Jacques’s eyes followed her. I noticed the tightening of his hand that was clamped on his daughter’s shoulder. I noticed her wince but keep her composure. My shoulder stung in sympathy where the bruises were concealed beneath the strap of my dress, my Aura working to heal them. Red and white, both bruised.

Yeah… it really isn't fair… is it?

“My dear, what are you doing over here?”

Her voice made every hair on my body stand on end. The guests, the music, the overwhelming stench vanished. For a second, I was lost in a void, afraid of where I’d land.

“Dear, will you speak to me?”

The sounds, colors, and smell came crashing back. As calmly as I could, I faced the owner of that horrible, silky voice.

“There you are! Why are you hiding your pretty face over here?” My stepmother asked. “Do you not want to be here?”

“O-of course I want to be here, mother,” The taste of that word made me nauseous. “I was just feeling a bit faint, so I needed a break.”

“Oh, that’s good. I wouldn’t want you to be pouting when you were offered such a generous invitation. Wouldn’t that be a shame, my dear?”

“Yes, it would be, mother.”

My stepmother adjusted my dress with nimble fingers that pressed harshly against my sides. “All better. Wouldn’t want you to look any less than perfect.”

As she drew back, Pemphredo Porpoise rose to her full height, standing over the heads of every woman present and even a good majority of the men’s. Silverly-metallic hair braided with silver links, chrome toned dress shimmering, silver wire jewelry expertly selected, eyes that shone like mirrors, Pem was a figure chiseled out of moonlight. She was so stunning that every eye that found her lingered as if mesmerized by her mere existence. When they discovered her remarkable reputation as a Huntress, they treated her like royalty, which she relished. At every party, she was the queen amongst her subjects. Her beauty undeniable, she was the focus of the spotlight.

And when the spotlight was gone, the nightmare beneath that beauty dug its claws into me. Every time I saw her made ancient bruises ache as if new.

“Please make sure to enjoy yourself, won’t you dear?” Pem asked, sweet as candy. “Remember, I always have an eye on you, so I’ll know if you’re uncomfortable. If that happens, I’ll take you home right away. Okay, dear?”

Guests within hearing distance smiled affectionately. Why wouldn’t they? We were the loving family that had come together after tragedy. When my mother, a Huntress, lost her life during an eradication mission, it was Pemphredo who picked the shattered pieces of our family and wove them into her own. She was our savior, the new mother of a girl who had lost her own.

Why would they need to know that if we left early, this angel would bare her fangs and sink them into me? Why would they be aware of the blows that would rain down before we had even shut the door? What did it matter to them? That would never happen, not from the astonishing Huntress, slayer of the Creatures of Grimm. She could do no wrong, even at her worst.

I took her hand in my own even as my skin crawled at the contact. “I’ll be fine, mother. I just need a moment.”

Pem smiled affectionately, caressing my head lovingly. “Of course, my dear. Take your time. After all,” Her hand cupped my cheek, the pressure increasing unnoticed by watching eyes. “We wouldn’t want you to be distressed. If that happens, I’ll be by your side in an instant.” She withdrew her hand. “I’m going to meet up with your father. Enjoy yourself. I love you.”

I didn’t hesitate. “I love you, too.” I wanted to vomit.

Pem was assimilated into the wealthy crowd, but I couldn’t miss the flashes of moonlight. Tears pressed against my eyes, but I refused to cry. I couldn’t afford to cause a scene. Instead, I forced myself to walk around the ballroom.

Pieces of art were hung up along the walls. I passed by a few, looking without processing, making light conversation with those that approached me. I observed without learning for half an hour. When I was nearing the end of the paintings, I was surprised once again.

That girl, Winter, was staring at a painting tucked in the corner of the room. She stared at the piece of art as if trying to drag something out of it. She seemed to sense me since she turned her head and saw me. The wondered look vanished from Winter’s face as she disappeared back into the throng.

I took her place in front of the painting. The first thing I saw was an orange leaf. For a moment, I thought that’s all it was, a leaf surrounded by shadows. It was the splash of white that made my eyes see the rest. The tiny stem of the leaf was in the hands of a demon with horrible teeth and wicked claws. It stared at the leaf as if it were the only thing in the world. The plant seemed to glow as if in a halo of orange light. It’s presence softened the demon, made it seem friendly. It wasn’t threatening, just mesmerized by a leaf.

I noticed that the painting wasn’t right. Something in the top right corner was off. When I shifted my head to try and get a better look, the entire painting shimmered. After turning my head this way and that, I realized it wasn’t a painting at all. It was one of those pictures whose image changed depending on what angle you viewed it from. When I adjusted my position to see the whole picture, my heartbeat flared.

The leaf was now withered, breaking to pieces in the demon's claw. The monster’s appearance was horrendous, so disgusting that I wanted to turn away but I couldn’t. Its maw was stretched wide, almost splitting its head in two. Blood stained its teeth, a brilliant red against the dark background. Disturbingly detailed lacerations coated the entirety of its limbs, so lifelike that it was as if I was staring at open wounds. The creature's back was bent, spines erupting from its skin. And it was smiling, that bloody abomination was smiling as the only living thing it held turned to dust.

Without that leaf, it was truly something so terrible that I wanted it to be erased without a trace. When I looked back, the picture had shifted and the leaf had returned, but I could no longer see that friendly demon without also seeing the creature it was when the leaf eventually died.

I heard laughter behind me. Pem’s arm was interlocked with my father’s, the pair laughing with Jacques, Deino and Enyo laughing along, while Winter stood a few paces away, still within arm’s length of her father.

Before all of this, it was simple. I would help my mother in the garden if she wasn’t off on a mission. My dad would read to me until my eyes grew heavy and I couldn’t stay awake any longer. Mom and dad would cheer me on when I trained, wanting so much to follow in my mother’s footsteps. And when I had a nightmare that made sleep an impossibility, my dad would sit with me until the fright receded. We would go on picnics in the garden, walk into town just to pick up groceries, swim in the lake when the summer was hot, huddle around the fire when the winter was cold. They would hold me as we snuggled underneath a massive blanket, drinking hot chocolate.

In a blink, those times had been replaced with a coffin being lowered into the ground. The groceries were delivered from that point on. The books of fairytales gathered dust as that sat on the shelves, the magic extinguished. I found no comfort when I had frequent nightmares, so I sat in my bed as sleep evaded me. The warmth had died with my mother, the dad I’d once known following her into the grave. The world lost color as the clock ticked without meaning. All magic, all light was lost.

When her silver light had entered, the demons had emerged.

As I stared at the four of them, I wished for nothing more than for the leaf to never wilt. Let the demon be something else. As long as the leaf was here, he never had to obtain that horrible face. The leaf held that monster at bay, so it needed to live! I need it to live!

A tear had fallen onto my dress. Pem shot a glance in my direction, frowning, before carrying on the conversation without disruption.

I would pay for that. I dried my eyes as carefully as I could. I can’t let myself break here. I rebuilt my composure, separating myself from the girl who was crying right now. I don’t need her right now. I wish I never did.

For me, the leaf was gone. And in its place, the demon had found a lynx, but it wasn’t the same. I felt both of their fangs and their claws. I bore pain that I never would have had to experience if my mother had been alive.

I want her back. I want her to save me.

But destiny can’t be denied, so I’m trapped.

All I can do is smile, and hope that the bruises will heal soon.