Self-defense? Why did he want to know if I knew self-defense? Was he going to have me mugged? Or better yet, was he giving me a warning that I shouldn’t keep my guard down in front of his son?

I didn’t like where this conversation was going to at all.

"A little...?" I swallowed. My lips went dry.

"Great.” There was a bang in the background.

What if he was at a shooting range? Cocking a gun whilst he was talking to me?

“Do you have lots of chinaware back home?"

I was probably sweating profusely then.

"Yes, why?"

"You're gonna need it."

But why? So I can fight back the goons he has waiting for me at some dark alley? It would be quite dangerous (and heavy) to have a couple stored in my backpack. But hey, what else do you need a piece of china for?

"You may or may not have noticed it but Brett is bipolar.”

Obviously.

“He tends to be," he wracked his brain for the right words, “moody.”

"I'm sorry, but I don't get where this is going Mr. Boyce." In other words, just give it to me point-blank.

"I don't mind if it's you...” he chuckled, “good enough to pass our future genes too..."

What the heck?

He seemed to be exaggerating a sob now, "please dear... you are my only hope... if he goes on with a temper like that, he may never bear me grandkids!"

Again, what the heck. Do I look like a baby-making machine to you? No. My point exactly. These Boyce people are a completely new level of cray-cray.

He must have taken my silence for an answer.

"You can put up with that right?” He wheezed, or at least to me it sounded like a wheeze with his labored breathing. “I doubt he'd even dare lay a finger on you without your consent," he paused, assuming I needed a couple of seconds to let that sink in, "He does have feelings for you."

He’s joking. That doesn’t make any sense at all. Yup, crazy. A total nutcase. A bunch of looney tunes.

Why would he like me anyway? That’s just disgusting.

"He was never serious with girls... In fact, he always hated them. I always thought he'd be, you know, gay... Then one night one of the house cleaners gave me a picture of you, she said she found it under his mattress... I've never seen that kid's eyes glimmer like that... that burning passion...” I shuttered at the thought. Talk about TMI.

"Don't worry Brian will be there to help you" he clicked his tongue. By the way, could I speak with him?"

He didn't even have to ask, the next thing I knew I was phone-less.

Brian... Brianna or whatever her name was, nursed my old-fashioned Nokia by her ear.

She nodded a few times, answering when necessary in hushed tones. She nods her head vigorously this time, looking like a fan beating to a rock song before slapping it shut.

“Looks like we’re going to be best friends forever! Hug me!”

She spread her arms out ready to pull me in.

“I’m not much of a hugger.” I laugh, backtracking my steps rather conspicuously.

"Enough crap” Brett, shoves a hand at her, it was comical really, the brunette extending her hands like a zombie coming for my brains and Brett, wrenching her forehead back, who knew a slight height difference could make a difference.

I couldn’t help but laugh.

“Let’s go" He was now hauling me off my feet. At some point during their endless bantering, I was laughing my butt off).

"Hey, let go of me!" We dragged on, my pleas continuously ignored. We passed the 4th year’s ward until finally, we stopped by a corner leading to a secret passage between the 3rd year and 2nd year's ward.

"Steer clear from him.”

I mean aside from blindsiding me with his (or her? I’m still confused as I took all of this in) advances, I don’t see anything wrong with Brianna… er... Brian.

"Why?" I challenged. Somehow, I felt the need to defend her.

"He's weird that's why!"

"She's cute." I badgered, not because it wasn't true and I wanted to piss him off but because it was true and I really wanted to piss him off.

"Are you that much of an idiot? I swear how did you get in this school anyway? Brianna is a guy. He also likes to cross-dress. It’s his kink.”

I don’t know what's wrong with that. We live in a new age, to each his own.

“Once he likes something he won't stop until he gets it."

"I see it runs in your bloodline." I scoffed, which must have set off a switch because his nostril was fuming.

"Focus you fool.” He practically growled, shaking my shoulders, “What did my dad say?"

"That's a secret..."

He inched forward toying with the top button of my uniform "do I have to strip it out of you?" he cooed, I felt like a doe caught in the headlights.

"You really want to know?" I teased attempting to turn up my charm. Okay that sounded wrong, but anyway, it worked! Two can play in that game; it’s time for Paige Angelina Levine to shine and have the upper hand in this master-dog relationship!

He nods flashing me a wolfish grin.

Huh, Mr. Boyce was right he was a sucker, either I could use that info as an advantage or barf at the sick reality: that faith can be such a bitch, and that love moves in every freaking mysterious way. In this case, Boyce junior was a sadistic passive-aggressive stalker.

I shivered at the thought of him staring at a stolen picture of me.

"Come closer," I whisper, urging him to close the gap between us.

He obeyed the command.

For some reason, I’m pumped that my sorry excuse for turning up my charm worked. I tittered, curious as to what expression he'd make if I'd cunningly breathe against his skin just to taunt him - which to my delight did wonders in making him flush beet red.

"What's so funny?" He raised a brow, eager for an answer.

"Nothing" I burst out with laughter.

I’m having a fit. I couldn’t help it. His expression’s hilarious! The way his forehead wrinkled, and his eyebrows of his furrows into one big worm. I should have taken a snap when I had the chance.

"I know you're hiding something” He’s jiggling my shoulders again, which makes me laugh even harder. “Spit it out, Levine!"

"Not telling," I mocked closing a zipper over my mouth and threw the invisible key.

We stared at each other, daring the other to speak. But I guess I lose this one. His piercing gaze was pretty threatening, wouldn’t want to anger the lion now, would we?

"You really want to know?" I pursed my lips, my final attempt to humor this ongoing charade.

"Yes!" he retorted still shaking my shoulders.

Somehow, I was feeling bold, I guess it would be a mistake I would later regret, but I was just drawn by the sudden rush of adrenaline.

I snaked an arm out for his neck, this was the only time I’ll be doing this so I best make the most out of it. Pulling him close, my leg kicks up, maybe I should have toned it down to his knee or thigh or something... but too late for that now. He could murder me for his inability to bear children later, but not today.

Sweet victory, here I come!

"You'll regret this Levine!" he cursed under his breath, and that’s my cue to skedaddle, but who would want to miss a chance to dance in one’s triumph?

Snapping a selfie with the still crouching student council president, I kind of, maybe accidentally sent it to Jason (What? A and U was just a couple of vowels away?). The MMS was actually meant for Mr. Boyce and Justin, but I guess this would also clear the air between Jason and myself.

Dangling my phone over him, I muster a final pint of courage.

"Levine one, Loser zero" and stuck my tongue out. He groaned. I felt sorry for a moment but realized he was Brett. I shouldn't feel sorry for kicking the guy in the balls. He deserved it.

Yeah, that's right, I tried to convince myself, he deserved every once of it.

Feeling a little too energetic, I ran off before he could come to and catch me.