Darkness controlled half the sky by the time the Lavenmore came into sight. Children raced each other down the street while men and women stood outside chatting. Some spoke of their plans for that night while others relayed in whines the frustrations of the day. Delightful smells wafted from every building, which bolstered the last of the strength Lydie's wobbling legs contained. She should have stopped an hour ago. Two hours even. Blackness not caused by dim light flickered at the edges of her vision as her stomach once again burned with a ferocity to match the pain in her head. The hope that the next store she entered would be the one had been the driving force behind her ignoring what she shouldn't. Unfortunately, disappointment after disappointment after disappointment demolished her energy as much as it did her optimism. Truly, Kenth had been a miracle all day. He hardly fussed, hadn't yet cried, and didn't appear to mind the long day strapped to her back. Lydie tried to point out his cooperative attitude to one prospective shop, and the daft worker simply scoffed and said there had to be something wrong with a baby so quiet. She had walked out of there with haste.

Boisterous music and powerful chatter slammed into her as soon as she cracked the door to the inn open. Walking inside threatened to blast her over, so when she caught Vertinac's eye while rushing to the stairs her chest grumbled fiercely in reluctance at him waving her to the bar.

"Lass, if you're plannin' on staying more than a day, I need to know. Payment is needed before 5, but I didn't go ahead 'n throw your stuff out seeing as how you seem new to Rydan."

"I'm sorry," Lydie apologized. She realized now she hadn't told the innkeeper any part of her plans, "I'll pay for three more days now, although my intention is to stay for a week."

"Why don't you pay in full then? If you leave early, I'll give the money back. I'm not gonna cheat you like that."

"Just like you didn't try to cheat me yesterday?" she questioned back with a raised brow, "In any case, the only money I have is money enough to pay for a week's stay. I need to hold onto a little something in case of an emergency."

"If your pocket's hurtin' that bad, maybe ya shouldn't be selfish and wasting your money on clothes the boy don't need yet and an infused trinket for you." Vertinac rebuked.

He spoke it so loudly several men at the bar gave agreeing nods and one even chuckled into his mug with a most terrible comment about women leaving his lips.

"How dare you call me selfish?!" Lydie didn't hesitate on snapping back even louder than him. Her patience gone, she glowered with flushed cheeks and no tamper on her tone, "I don't have any place to belong nor anyone to turn to! Someone attacked me and took away everything, and it's by one healer's sheer generosity that we weren't dumped onto the streets with absolutely nothing! I haven't spent a piece of the money he gave me on anything but the room here! The clothes and bracelet were given to me out of sheer pity by places rejecting my employment, something I've spent the entire day madly trying to find! It's rather difficult though, you know, when you have a baby...if people aren't making up bullshit excuses to blatantly charge you more they're shoving you out the door with disgust on their face or patronizing you when they have no damn idea what they're talking about!

The area around the two grew impossibly silent. Most men drinking kept a steady gaze on their tankards while a brave few glanced meekly in her direction. Patrons in the dining area ceased their conversation to turn around as two workers from the kitchen peeked their heads through the nearby door. Lydie, however, kept her glowered lock on Vertinac. Her hand dug out three of her precious coins and slammed them on the counter.

"I hope you're a better person than you've shown yourself to be with me. Otherwise I can't understand how you stay in business swindling your customers and belittling them in front of others. Those are the traits of despicable men."

Countless eyes watched Lydie stomp to the stairs with her head held high. She cared not for them or any response on the innkeeper's part. His expression had fallen and his jaw constricted tightly. Maybe she'd pissed him off completely. Perhaps she'd put him in his place for the second day in a row. Either way, Lydie firmly decided as she rushed to her room that she held no love for the man in her heart. The tears streaming down her cheeks the instant the room's door closed behind her proved that definitively. She could hardly stumble to the bed, and her fingers fumbled with the knots on the cloth carrier. Her sore back too tortured throughout the day received little relief from Kenth's release.

"Kenth, please, I'm sorry. I just need a moment." she spoke in gentle sobs when he reached for her after he was placed on the ground. He willingly took the toy she hurriedly searched out from the bag, and with her baby content she buried her face in the pillow she glued to herself with shaking arms. The pain of everything- all she'd lost, all she was missing, the unending agony in her body, the weakness from hunger, the harshness and rejection of others, and the knowledge Adina had been very much correct...it poured out in a poorly contained fit. Lydie could stop not her tears, shaking breaths, or quiet whines. She mumbled out a hopeless beg for a mother and father she could only hope existed. They had to be out there somewhere. She had to have a family. Even merely thinking there wasn't one nearly broke her.

In her misery Lydie wallowed. Despite her aching head, demanding stomach, and parched throat, she couldn't get herself off the bed to bother with any of them. The sky darkened completely, Kenth entertained himself by crawling underneath the dresser and then out again and again, and the chatter from down in the street dimmed. An hour passed. More time went by after that, but Lydie couldn't say how much. Her heavy eyes closed, and the next thing she knew knocking on the door jolted her out of a weak rest.

"Who is it?" Lydie, sitting up, mumbled the call as her gaze desperately sought out Kenth. He sat on the floor having snuck her shoes from the dresser. A mismatched pair rest on the wrong foot.

"It's me, hun." the barmaid from the previous night answered.

"You can come in. I forgot to lock the door."

Impressively, the middle-aged woman easily opened the door and stepped inside while carrying a large tray in her hands. She sat it down on the nightstand without waiting for permission. A plate of chicken and capper apples as beautifully prepared as before sat surrounded by a bowl of fluffy rice, a mixed salad, double the amount of bread, two slices of pie, and a pitcher of what appeared to be warm cider. Several smaller bowls contained what had to be Kenth's dinner.

"Vertinac's attempt at an apology. I told the man he needed give you words as well as food, but the man loses his nerve once embarrassed. It's not often he gets put in his place in front of all his customers. Hasn't happened for years now, so his foolish mind has forgotten to keep his tongue in check," the woman explained, fond remembrance in her eyes, "I hope you don't mind that the chicken is the same. You did seem to enjoy it last night, and we weren't sure what else you would like."

"It's more than fine. Tell Petrin I love it," Lydie managed a smile, "Thank you."

"Of course. Just let me know if there's anything else I can help you with. You do look so pale, hun. It is clear your life is not giving you many breaks right now. If you don't have much money, I'll see if we can find some through other means. People say there's no help to be had in such tough times, but I don't believe that."

"Do you know any places that would hire me even though I have Kenth?" Lydie questioned once more.

"None off the top of my head, but I'll keep an ear out and ask around. There'll be someone out there who will take you. In the meantime, you rest for tonight. Eat up, and I'll be back to collect your dishes when you're done."

"Yes, ma'am." Lydie accepted the order with gentle amusement.

"Good girl," the barmaid smiled, "And let's see what we can do about Vertinac in the morning. He usually is quite amicable to everyone. Only gets testy when people are being unreasonable. I think it might be the fact that you remind him-"

"Remind him...?"

"Ah, it's not my place to say, I suppose. If you want to know, you'll have to ask him," the barmaid spoke before laughing at her pout, "I thought as much. I'll leave the matter up to you. See you in a bit."

Lydie nodded goodbye, and the older woman left. Kenth slowly crawled over, her shoes far too large for him hindering his process, yet Lydie momentarily ignored him to shove the chicken and apples in her mouth. Taste once again didn't hit her tongue until the meat, rice, and half the pitcher of cider were gone, but Lydie could have cried from happiness simply from the delight of having her stomach full. The salad proved troublesome to get down, all she could manage of the pie was a few mouthfuls, and the bread was again wrapped for breakfast the following morning. Kenth eagerly ate his portion after that, and Lydie let him have more of her dessert than she probably should. She was prepared to collapse for the night then. Her back, however, demanded steaming hot water. The barmaid snuck in and out when the tub was full, politely providing small containers to keep the uneaten food in. Having no other material, Lydie read the book of the Justiciar as her muscles relaxed in the water that went from a smidge too hot, to comfortable, to bearable enough. Kenth received a wipe down before being cuddled in his nightclothes. The steam from the wash room filled the area with a mild sticky humidity, prompting her to crack open the window to let the spicy night air waft inside.

"If there's no proper way to do this..." Lydie mumbled to herself. Her fingers laced together slowly as she rest her elbows on the windowsill. Her eyes closed, her breaths deepened, and she thrust all distracting thoughts from her mind, "Please keep Tomald safe. I don't know what he thinks of his life, but I am grateful for it. He deserves to come home, and if he feels he doesn't have one maybe we can find one together. I wish for the fighting to end soon for his safety, the other soldiers' safety, and for the security and peace of mind of families like Julik and his mother. There's little I can do to make any of this better, but I will help in whatever way I can. All I wish is for the ability to stand on my own feet and not be reliant on the charity of others. Finding my family, learning who I am...that can come later. I make no demands, just these humble requests."

The wind blew quietly against her cheek. Glittering stars twinkled in the obsidian sky while the peace of the night soothed the worries, fears, and anxiousness sitting in her chest all day. For now, that was good enough. Lydie gave Kenth another chance at accepting the crib, sighed in relief when he conked out instantly, and snuggled deeply into her blankets to await what she hoped to be a better day.